jersey shore cast

JWoww ShamWow and Snooki were celebrating Cinco de Mayo in Miami whilst filming scenes for the new season of Jersey Shore.  With all the grease and oil that’s all over them you’d assume the lime would just shoot out of their mouths like a bullet.  I’m glad that JWoww is wearing her token sombrero, but […]

Well.  As if we didn’t already know that JWoww ShamWow smelled like a mix between packaged ham, Sex on the Beach test tube shots, and burnt skin, we can finally add Misty 120’s to that list of scents as well.  I mean, it’s like her future perfume line invents itself. JWoww was caught by the […]

Well now this IS bazaar and bizarre all wrapped up and held together with the elastic band from tanning goggles.   Snooki, JWoww ShamWow, and Sami SweatStains all became elegant “ladies” for a photoshoot with Harper’s Bazaar magazine.  Uh, maybe Nell Harper’s. The pigs in heat all got etiquette lessons from Lizzie Post and put […]

Wanna try and punch Snooki in the face again?  Well good luck getting through two layers of tan and Real Housewives of Orange County inspired fingernails.  Oh that’s right, Snooki is putting up quite the defense this season.  I also like how Snooks is being proactive in regards to her red highlights she’s added to […]

It’s like all of a sudden saying that the birth of Jesus took place in a bedazzled stainless steel manger in the sunny Caribbean.  You just can’t rewrite history like that.  Well the same goes for the trashmasters over at the Jersey Shore.  People (i.e me) were dumbfounded when they heard that Snooki and crew […]

Refreshed with a stack of sombreros, Snooki is doing her best Speedy Gonzales impression in caliente South Beach, Miami.  See what I’m doing with all the Spanish references?  I may be over it already.  Anygtl, Snooki Gonzales met up with her other cast-mates like JWoww ShamWow, who is slowly channeling Charo in that dress (coochie! […]

What would you do if I told you that you could help the children of St. Jude’s Hospital AND become a juiced-up-GTL-Guido all at the same time?  I’m sure you’d say, “But IBBB!  It can’t be so.  How can I achieve all of my life’s goals in one quick shot?”  Well, I’d reply back to […]

I can hardly wait until the new season of Jersey Shore starts up.  To keep myself entertained I’ve been collecting dust bunnies from my apartment and gluing them together with 2 parts chewing gum to 3 parts sugar water and making an “instant poof” that I place on top of my TV so that I […]

Ugh.  Why always the pointing with the fingers?  Who do you see, Pauly?  Just tell us for Christ sakes.  Use your words, Pauly, use your words. A lifelike Troll Doll, Pauly D from Jersey Shore, made a red carpet appearance in Vegas the other night to attend the premiere of “She’s Out of My League” […]

Honestly, all I see if a floating head.  The Rhea Perlman of our generation, Snooki Polizzi, and her boyfriend, Emilio Masella, are officially in love and probably will be until the new season of Jersey Shore starts filming.  Snooki’s boyfriend told People, “We both started feeling it at the same time.”  I assume he’s referring […]

I know this is 2 days old, but I can’t get enough.  The D-Bag Brigade that is the cast of the Jersey Shore showed up on the Tonight Show again to try their tanned hands at a little Jaywalking.  As always, my iced coffee straw could get more answers right than this crew, but, as […]

Well Harper’s Bazaar just fell into the dumpster and hit every female cast member of Jersey Shore on the way down.  First of all, why is that the way “Bazaar” is spelled?  Is that the correct way?  I don’t get it.  Eh, I’m not checking.  Second, according to detective work that may have been done […]

It’s the dream just won’t end.  The cast of The Jersey Shore stopped by The View yesterday to chat with the ladies who all seemed like they were pissed off just because they all had to show up to work.  However, Barbara wasn’t there for the interview, which is probably great for us because the […]

When I was in Catholic school in the 90’s, the nun would NEVER let any of us get the haircut that Grandpa Sitch is now sporting.  No, I’m not talking about the gel’d spikes, I’m talking about the two (and sometimes three) shaved lines on the side of his head.  Yeah, we all wanted to […]

Help Me Work For “The Soup!”  Join the Facebook Group Here! Read Past Jersey Shore Recaps! What do you do when your fist pump suffers from frostbite?  Well, you pack up your tubs of gel, stash your Nads and tweezers in your duffel bag, and ship two cases of AquaNet to Miami because, according to […]

One of Ellen’s favorite games (no, her other favorite game) “Know or Go” got a little extra grease in it’s levers when Snooki, Grandpa Situation, and Pauly D stopped by for a visit on The Ellen DeGeneres Show.  To my complete surprise, Pauly D was actually pretty smart.  Well, I don’t know if “smart” is […]

As the Douche-Bag Press Tour continues to criss-cross applesauce all over the United States, one of the next stops for the Jersey Shore cast is on ABCs “The View.”  My little Snooki, JWoww ShamWow, Grandpa Situation, Pauly D/Ellen Travolta, Sammi SweatStains, Ronnie the Stump, and Vinny are all scheduled to appear on the Feb 23rd […]

See what I did there?  You know, the baggage?  Yeah?  You with me?  I made Pauly D pull Farrah’s baggage?  Right?  Good, right?  Ok, well not the worst I’ve done.  Anywax, rumors spread like the wild-fire between Lindsay Lohan’s crotchtastic legs late last week that Jersey Shore’s Pauly D and Teen Mom’s Farrah were now […]

Hey America!  It’s your girl….Snooki!  During Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live (or “SNL” as “the kids” call it), we were visited again by the one and only Snooki from Jersey Shore.  This time, however, Snooki (played by Bobby Moynihan) got it right by going from a dark tan (from the last time he played […]

Ever struggled with your faith?  Well struggle no more because Jesus Claus does exist and he has come in the form of JerzifyYourself.com.  A friend of a friend of mine actually created this website where you can simply upload your face, adjust your tan, and presto, you’ve turned yourself into the best Grandpa Situation or […]

JWoww ShamWow and Grandpa Situation showed us exactly what it takes to get on a television series in the United States.  JWoww, the self proclaimed Guidette, points to exactly where she had to place something in order to get cast on Jersey Shore and Grandpa Sitch wanted to make sure that Jesus was as close […]

Your favorite Jersey Shore skunk-head, JWOWW (which stands for Janky Weave on Whitetrash Woman) may have shown her rack and bumbum and those photos are reportedly being shopped around right now.  I’d like to make an offer of three easy installments of $19.99 if she is willing to keep her yellow shirt on permanently.  Haven’t […]

Those wild and crazy kids from the Jersey Shore are in yet another magazine.  This time they’re playing dress-up and headed out to the Ritz-Carlton in NYC for an InTouch Weekly spread.  Haha, spread.  It was “opposites day” on the set so everyone got “dressed up” in their Sunday best.  This means that the guys […]