• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer

IBBB

  • Teen Mom
    • Teen Mom 2
  • Top Presents
    • Gifts For Women
    • Gifts For Men
    • Mom Gifts
    • Dad Gifts
    • Teenager Gifts
  • Winter Fun
    • Cheap Snowblowers
    • Oprah’s Favorite Things
    • Flannels
    • Snow Boots
    • Wine Time!
  • Toys
    • LOL Bigger Surprise
    • Scruff a Luvs
    • Hatchimals Mystery
    • LOL Doll House
    • Pomsies
    • Fingerlings Untamed
    • Fuggler Dolls
    • Reviews
    • Shopping Guide
  • Tech
  • More Gifts
    • Cheap Presents
    • Best Toys 2019
    • Tech Gadgets
    • Kids Gifts
    • Last Minute Ideas
  • Fashion
    • Mens Jeans
    • On-Trend Sneakers
    • Cologne in 2019
    • Mens Dress Shoes
    • More Men’s Fashion
    • Mr. Porter
    • Grooming & Skincare
  • Deals
    • Wayfair
    • Nordstrom
    • Walmart
    • Zappos
    • Sephora
    • Home Depot
    • Target
  • Sales
    • 4K TVs
    • Bed Sheets
    • School Supplies
    • Christmas Sale
    • Mattresses
  • Promo
    • Macys
    • Best Buy
    • Minted
    • EyeBuyDirect
    • Dermstore
    • MattressFirm

The Hills Season 5 Preview: Scripted Punches, Scripted Tears, Scripted Hugs. Scripted Scripts.

Last Updated: February 24, 2009 By ibbb

0
SHARES
ShareTweet
Follow

the-hills-season-5

 

 

So yeah, uh, I’m playing it cool.  I could care less that I just saw the teaser for The Hills Season 5.  Yeah, who cares, right?  That show totally sucks.  Ok, now that that’s over.  I’m completely pumped that The Hills Season 5 is going to start soon and after seeing the ridiculousness that is this preview I am counting down the days until I can recap this crap.  Just from this 2 minute and 18 second clip I’m already pee’ing myself laughing.  Here are just some of my favorite parts, some:

  • Lauren takes her moustache to see a “psychic” and the “psychic” tells Lauren mysterious visions of her being betrayed in the past and how there was someone who took her friend away from her. Wow.  Someone must have spit-shined her crystal ball!  How on earth (Us Weekly and MTV) would this “psychic” ever be able to know these things?!  Seriously, my mom doesn’t even watch The Hills and even she knows about Lauren and Heidi’s past.
  • Lauren’s surprise birthday party was on a yacht and they might as well have lit fireworks around her because when “the douche bag gang” yelled “surprise!” LC almost did stinky-bottoms in her pants.  Either that or they actually yelled “surprised!” when Heidi walked into the floating party.
  • Meanwhile, Steve Sanders faux-flirts with some random skanky bartender who “will always be known as the girl who flirted back at Steve Sanders and his Santa pubes beard.”  Sorry, sweetie, you might as well start etching this onto your tombstone because this is your claim to fame.
  • Heidi flies out to see one of my favorite people in the whole entire world, Darlene “the Ugly Crier Montag in one of my favorite places in the world, Crested “Heidi’s Horse Should be Shot” Butte! Whilst speaking with Darlene I’m pretty sure Heidi is sporting a beret with a giant snowball on her head.
  • Steve Sander and the boyfriend of Sandy Sanders get into a “dance off fight” at the bar.  Steve Sanders is slapping at him like an Italian grandmother chasing her no-good husband around the kitchen table with a slipper in her hand.  Brilliant.
  • Finally, Heidi and Lauren have a cry-off and hug it out (bitch).  While Whitney isn’t on the show anymore, I’m pretty sure she wrote the lines that Heidi is saying while she’s crying to Lauren: My favorite stories are my stories with you. My favorite memories are my memories with you.  She should have finished it with: My favorite table-readings were my table-readings with you.  My favorite cue cards were my cue cards held by you.

Can’t wait for this crap.  Please, please, please don’t let me get a life before the new season starts!

Facebook Comments

And This Too:

  • The Hills Final Season Preview: The Role of Heidi Montag is Apparently Being Played By Teri Hatcher Wearing a Walgreens Fright Wig
  • Yay! A Heidi Spencer Murder Suicide?!
  • MTV The Hills: Are Lauren & Heidi Friends?
  • The Hills Season 3: Good Times

Filed Under: the hills, the hills recap Originally Published: February 24, 2009

Primary Sidebar

Get Social

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter

Oh Hey!

IBBB hopes you love these product recommendations. When you choose to buy our editorially chosen picks, we may earn affiliate commissions from the links on this page. It helps keep the lights on around here! Read more here.

So Hot Right Now

Mens Colognes Everyone Loves
The Best Smelling Perfume Ever
Chic Briefcases for Men in 2018
Super Trendy Mens Shoes in 2018
Our Favorite Christmas Gifts For the 2018 Season
Cute Fingerlings Monkeys for 2018!
Emergency Last Minute Christmas Presents

Footer

Info

Contact Us
Privacy Policy
Ad Partner
Ad Policies
Affiliate Disclosure
Sitemap

Trending

New Must-Have Men’s Sneakers
Killer J. Crew Sales in 2019
The Latest Trend in Mens Denim Jeans
Killer Sunglasses For Guys That are Affordable
5+ CBD Edibles to Help With Anxiety & Sleep
Top 10 Nerdy Eyeglasses & Frames
Best-Selling Watches for Men
25+ Mom Gifts at Mother’s Day She’ll Love
Best On-Ear Wireless Headphones in 2019
Find the Right Coffee Maker for You
The Hottest Womens Perfume
Popular Gifts for Him This Year

Gift Guides

BFF Approved Best Friend Gifts 2019
Most Popular Subscription Boxes in 2019
Top Gift Ideas for Your Sister She’ll Love
Beauty & Makeup Monthly Subscriptions We Love
What to Gift the Tech Lover in Your Life
2019’s Guide to Gifts for Her She Legit Wants
Cool Holiday Gifts for Men They’ll Want to Actually Use in 2019
The Most Popular Christmas Toys Now
Good Wife Gifts For Her Today!
Top Selling Subscription Boxes Online

Copyright © 2019 IBBB (ImBringingBloggingBack.com)