Fine, so this recap is late. Sue me. The Hills episode āSecond Chancesā really delivered this week and by ādeliveredā I mean āmade me lapse into a pleasant and restful coma.ā Hereās how I lost more braincells:
- I love seeing Audrina and Lauren working out at Equinox gym. What the hell are they doing? Why are they lifting one 3 pound weight in the air?
- Is Laurenās personal trainer retarded? Just checking.
- Jason called Laurenā¦..only because the script told him to.
- I have a question. Why does Heidi want to get a promotion at āworkā when she makes $25,000 an episode on The Hills? I mean, at that point do you really need the promotion? As a side note, why does Heidi dress like a newscaster at work? This still puzzles me.
- How much time does Steve Sanders spend on his āAppleā laptop and his āApple iPhoneā and his āApple iPod?ā Yeah we get it. Apple has given you a crap load of money to use their products.
- Yeah! Itās date night! Laurenās date āDerekā and the other dude are both equally mentally challenged. They are talking about mullets before Lauren and Audrina show up. Ok fine, that was cool.
- āDerekā spends 20 minutes talking about his 40 cent t-shirts. This kid canāt get worse.
- Ok, he can. āDerekā then tells Lauren at Le Deaux that he likes her more than any girl heās known and then he said he murdered some people. Hey MTV, can we grab a quick background check? Thanks.
- What are Whitneyās actual responsibilities. I want to see her job description. Wait, what is Laurenās job responsibilities? She is just taking clothes off of a rack and placing them elsewhere on the rack. Where can I get a job like this?
- Again, why does Heidi want this job? It must pay minimum wage and she makes $25,000 an episode. Sheās getting close to āFriendsā money.
- Loās new nose has arrived. Why is Lo the only one who brings up Justin Bobby?
- Congrats. Heidi got the promotion. Elodie is going to have to move out of her apartment and live in a dumpster. She can share the space with Steve Sanders. Itās great the Heidi can elevate her ādouche bagā status on an episode by episode basis.
- Lauren meets up with Jason for āscripted coffeeā and it makes me miss Cami from Laguna Beach. Is that a normal reaction?