Poor Whitney. She’s been basically MIA all season. Is it because she isn’t quite as douchey as the other girls? Is it because she is a high-powered intern manager now at Teen Vogue? One may never truly know. Here’s how the latest episode, “Rolling With the Hills” went down:
- Ok no joke, in the opening scene with Lauren and Audrina I honestly have no idea what they are talking about. Something about Justin Bobby, something about Steve Sanders, and perhaps the war in Iraq.
- Alright! Heidi is filming a scene back at her office, Bolthouse! Is it normal that at their company meeting Heidi’s boss, Brent Bolthouse, asks her if Lauren and Brody are going out again? Is that really something would be on the meeting agenda? Also, why is Heidi dressed like she’s a newscaster for the 5:00 news?
- Can Audrina please stop talking about her helmet that was left at Brody’s BBQ? I feel like Audrina’s helmet is the 3rd roommate. Ok, the fourth. Her teeth are the 3rd.
- Is Steve Sanders growing a white beard? A few more weeks and he’ll actually have Santa’s beard. Actually that will be perfect for the Christmas episode and it’ll make more sense once I start calling him “Sanders Claus.” Brilliant.
- Oh. Time to go to apparently the only bar/club in LA: Les Deux.
- AWESOME! Lauren’s friend, Ryan, is there. No clue who this dude is, but the fact that he literally has the same hairdo as Sideshow Bob makes me like him already.
- Lauren seems shocked that she saw two girls making out in the bathroom. Isn’t Heidi and Steve Sanders making out technically “two girls making out?” Oh! Stop me if you heard this! Try the veal! Tip your waitress.
- I’m glad Lo is back from the dead. Although I’m a little pissed that she isn’t in the opening credits. I mean, she’s basically been in every episode this season. And, I’m glad that we live in a world where to people like Whitney and Lo can coexist.
- YEAH! Whitney is back and she and Lauren are actually doing “work.” Whitney and Lauren stay real busy by having a full on conversation about what they would do if their names were Tiffany and Crystal. They even change their voices to act like Tiff and Crystal. Do they get paid to work? Just checking.
- Audrina is getting ready to go to dinner with Justin Bobby. What is that tattoo on her neck? Is it of her teeth?
- Sweet. Justin Bobby’s car is a throw back to the 60’s. That’s perfect for his laid back persona. These two star-crossed lovers have a little dinner at Toi. Does Justin Bobby do drugs? My favorite part is when he tells Audrina he doesn’t like to put “statements” on things like their relationship. Doesn’t he mean “labels.” Come on, think Justin Bobby, think!
- Justin Bobby continues to ramble about society and their friends putting pressure on their relationship. Yeah, it might just be their friends putting pressure on their relationship. I think society is too busy trying to figure out who Justin Bobby is and what Justin Bobby does for a living more than if he and Audrina are officially girlfriend and boyfriend.
- Uh-oh the girls are fighting. Steve Sanders and Brody are bitch-fighting over the phone. Steve Sanders tells Brody he has no loyalty because he hangs out with Lauren. At one point Steve Sanders says that Brody is his enemy and then hangs up on him. Can you be in your twenties and technically call someone your enemy? Arch Nemesis maybe, but “enemy” not so much.
- Please enter my favorite scene so far this entire season: Jen Bunney’s nose job.
- Heidi and Jen Bunney have a little breakfast in LA and something is very different. Jen Bunney’s nose is almost completely gone. No joke it’s like they cast a completely different Jen Bunney. Basically it’s like that time that Bewitched cast a different “Darren” or Roseanne cast a different “Becky.”
- Jen Bunney looks waaaaaay better with less nose. Good for her. The only thing is that her voice sounds a little different, almost like she has a cold. Hopefully she does have a cold or that would suck. I mean it would all be worth it, but still kind of suck.
- As a sidenote, are they eating literally in the middle of a major intersection?
- Their conversation, of course, is about whether or not Heidi and Lauren will be friends again. Blah blah blah.
We are halfway through the season and still no Lisa Loveless. What a waste. Anyway, I’m not really sure what this episode was about. Until next week….