Heidi: The Fugly Mermaid

I wanna be where the chins are. I wanna see, wanna see Heidi dancing. Walking around with those -what do you call ’em? Oh – fake boobs! Flippin your nose, you don’t get too far. Talent is required for singing, dancing. Up where she walks, up where she runs. Up where she sells-out all day in the sun. Talent free. Wish I could be, part of her world!

Bonus points if you got any of that. Heidi and Steve Sanders got their Halloween costumes off the rack in the Halloween aisle at Walgreens. I can almost smell the plastic and felt from here and I’m not even talking about Heidi’s nose and boobs. Oh! Stop me if you heard this!

Heidi looks simply beautiful with her little mermaid outfit and Steve Sanders looks like the real spider man! It really is a special day. I mean, Steve Sanders clearly permed his hair for his costume and Heidi clearly washed up on shore for her Halloween costume. The saddest part? At some point these two both looked in the mirror and said, “Perfect. Let’s go.”