Teen Mom 2 Recap: Please Tase Him, Bro!Author: Patrick Varone Updated: April 9, 2014 30 minutes until the #TeenMom2 Live Tweet! Go tell your garbage bag friends to follow me! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Once again it's a proven fact that poor people love painting entire rooms dark blue #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Why bother painting when Suzi is most likely going to crash through each wall of the house within 2 days #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Oh snap Mother Mary is totally South Dakotian flirting with Adam right in front over Chelsea! Keep it in yo pants! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014We is drinkin' fruit punch out of wine glasses, y'all! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014If Leah gets a divorce she should immediately start working on her 4th kid with her 3rd husband, y'all! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014This is NOT what the Bible meant. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Does Leah really love Jeremy or is she just seeking approval from a male figure b/c she didn't have a dad? Yep, I'm dissecting #TeenMom2— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Oh Jace should totally be taking karate class. I mean, why not just have old Amber teach it. And then everyone can just snort Jace #TeenMom2— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Yeah so is that karate instructor a red dot on any online public maps by any chance? #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014My money is on two weeks before Jace body slams Barb onto the Walmart deli slicer #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014P.S., it's "hi-yah" not "Kia." Dumb kids. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Chelsea and Megan are like God-damn Siamese twins and fused together via their Halloween fright-wigs. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014"Oh hi, Jenelle." #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Jenelle argues with Nathan over zombies? Zombies is code for "abortions" #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Barb is laying the smackdown! "Why won't he speak to me, Jenelle" #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014"Every guy you've been with has sucked u dry." I'm pretty sure if Jenelle sucked them dry she wouldn't have got pregnant. Hey-oh! #TeenMom2— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Love how Peach drove Kail to hospital. Sorry Kail but your baby is in another castle! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014I also love how Kail is giving birth with a side ponytail. The Cowardly Lion had a cub named President Lincoln #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Please. Leah is meeting up with Corey in a parking lot to give traditional parking lot handies #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Speaking of Lincoln, how's Corey's Emancipation Proclamation beard? #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Four Score and seven babies ago, y'all! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014For real Corey talking to Leah is like a girzzly bear trying to break into her car via the passenger window #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014I still hope Leah and Corey get together again. Ross and Rachel forever. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Please it's South Dakota. Chelsea doesn't need to be certified. She can spray tan you on the side of the highway I think #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Yes! It's like we're watching COPS! Nathan arrested and TASERED is everything #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014It was like Darth Vadar telling Nathan he was under arrest #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Something tells me that wasn't the first time some guy was on top of Nathan with handcuffs. WINK #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Can't we all relate to planning painting the baby's room around your baby daddy jail time? AMERICA! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014WHAT?! Suzi was caught drinking? NEVER. Seeing Suzi on a bender is my bucket list #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Uh, these girls are like 3 years old. Where are they cheering?! Stop sexualizing children, West Virginia! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014The best and most obvious solution for the Leah/Corey/Jeremy situation is a Polygamist Sect. Get the paper dresses ready, y'all! #TeenMom2— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014No, it's YOUR sex life .org #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Uh, have we ever seen Adam's mom before? I mean, she's no Joetta. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014"Don't break her neck!" That's Barb's job! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014The cops couldn't prove Nathan was drunk. They just assumed a grown man w/ dyed blond hair had to be under the influence. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014All this constant jail talk is like nursery rhymes to Jace #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Jeremy has been talking for upwards of 1 minute. I have legit no idea one thing he just said. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014I mean let's be honest, Jeremy, there isn't an office job in the world that would take you. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Shame on you #MTV for not filming the drunk tweets from Suzi. Shame on you! #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014Thanks for playing along, y'all! Until next time. #TeenMom2 #MTV— IBBB (@ibbb) April 9, 2014 More IBBB Favorites: Teen Mom 2 Recap: Jenelle's 8th Pregnancy In Under 5 Episodes (Drink!) Teen Mom 2 Recap: West Virginian Bacon Face Slaps Teen Mom 2 Recap: Jenelle and Nathan are the Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin of Our Generation Teen Mom 2 Season Finale Tweet Roundup