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Nicole Richie to Burn in the Pits of Hell

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On this scripted season of the reality show “The Simple Life” Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton will be working as camp counselors at many different Southern California camps. One of those camps will be a “fat camp” that helps kids overcome their weight issues in a very healthy way. That “way” will all come to end when Paris and Nicole show up and really teach these kids how to shed those pounds by utilizing the following tools:
  • The ever popular “toothbrush”
  • The always handy “finger”
  • Prefect throat measurement with a “ruler”
  • The gotta puke on the run “pen”

Seriously, is this a joke? Sadly it isn’t. Why would someone listen to Nicole Richie on eating advice? That’s like me giving “nice lessons” to kindergarten kids. It just doesn’t make sense. That’s like having Tyra Banks give “humble lessons.” Ok one more. That’s like Fantasia Barrino giving “smiling lessons.” Yeah, that’s right. Smiling lessons. They exist.

There were so many titles I could have given this post, but let’s face it, “Nicole Richie to Burn in the Pits of Hell” is all encompassing. Now don’t get me wrong, I know I’ll be there too so save the hate mail. Like I said before as long as I can get a tan and an iced coffee every now and then I think hell will be a real hoot. I hope to interview Nicole while I’m there. The tough part will be finding a way to share that interview with all of you while I’m in hell. More than likely I’ll provide instructions on how to contact me via a Ouija board. Someone just remind me.

Who Shot Those Stick!?!

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