Lindsay is a little teapot. She’s a little freckled teapot. She’s a pale little teapot with freckles. And you know, you know, Sam Rotten is totally going to tip her over and pour her out when Linds gets all steamy. Yeah she will. Yeah she will. She’ll pour Lindsay’s tea in her Freddie Kruger hat. Yeah she will. Yeah she will. Ok, I don’t know what that last one meant.Lindsay Lohan, her paste white legs, her freckles, and Samantha Rotten enjoyed a nice and sunny lunch in NYC at Bar Pitti. After the meal Lindsay and Sam enjoyed coffee and a cigarette. And totally know that Lindsay must have taken a huge freckly dump minutes after the cigarette. The poor patrons at Bar Pitti. Speaking of which, have you have been to Bar Pitti? I’ve been 4 times. Technically I only ate their once, the other 3 times I couldn’t be seated for over 2 hours. Oh, and they don’t accept credit cards…or checks…or seashells. Good luck trying to pay the bill without money. They tend to not like that.
I wish I was at the table next to Lindsay, who was taking a break from filming Ugly Betty, and Sam. I would have just looked at them the whole time and tried to get into their conversation. I would have been like, “Hey, what are you guys talking about? Lesbian stuff?” Or maybe as they were talking I would have just interrupted and been like, “Dina what?” If none of that worked I would have picked up my cell phone and would have been like, “Hey Ali. Yeah, I’m good, how are you? I like the new song. Oh, hold on I have a beep. Hello? Hey Dina, what up!” That totally would have messed with Linds. Then when Linds asked who I was talking to I would just say, “Ugh. Can I just have some privacy please. I’m a person too, you know!” Wow I’m a tool.