Lindsay Lohan Fell Into a Cactus. So, Sounds Like She’s Doing Better, No?


Yawn.  Lindsay Lohan fell into a giant cactus when she arrived at a friends house in the Hollywood Hills the other night.  If I had a dime for every time I heard the phrase, “Lindsay Lohan fell into a cactus” I would have over $548,451.80. That poor cactus.  I would get it tested STAT!  Imagine Lindsay’s “freckle farm” falling directly on you?  I don’t care if it IS covered by a protective layer of cheap/thin leggings.  I’d get tested.

Luckily, Lindsay was with a friend who helped lift her out of the pile of pricks (once again) while the paparazzi did nothing to help but take pictures….which kinda does help because, let’s face it, Lindsay can use all the exposure she can get right now.  If she were smart, once she fell in the cactus she should have started dry humping it and then sued it for $100 million for sexual assault.  See?  Linds needs me on her team.

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