Itâs official. Lindsay Lohan is in the official child molester uniform, right down to the molester socks and the diddler shoes. Ok, so the the dress isnât too molestery, but the socks and shoes are definitely official. She looks like she should be driving a 1985 Oldsmobile and going about 5 mph around a school playground. Pervert. I know Iâve said it before, but if you have money, dress like it. I donât care if you are running to grab a coffee at 3:45 in the morning, you should be dressed to the nines, if youâre rich. If I was loaded and had to run out and didnât have anything good to wear I would just staple $100 dollar bills up and down my pants and shirt, just so people would know I had money. If Lindsay needs help with the staples all she has to do is let me know.
Moving on, Lindsay has recently said that she wants to be married by the time sheâs 30 and also have an Oscar by then as well. It must be nice to have dreams like that. Sometimes I dream that I win $5.00 on a scratch ticket or that it wonât rain tomorrow. I guess Oprah was right when she said that we should dream big. You know what, Oprah, youâre right. I will dream big. I dream that by the time Iâm 30 I get to throw eggs at Lindsay at the Oscarâs. Wow. It does feel good to dream big.