I love it when there’s an event so random that you get a complete mixed-bag of fauxlebrities. You can usually make an educated guess on how bad the fauxlebrities will be based on the host themselves. For instance, at the Red, White, and Blue Summer Oasis event that took places in Hollywood, CA the host was Christina Milian. Now I like Christina Milian especially after her record label gave her the major shaft, but let’s face it, if she’s hosting there’s not doubt in my mind that the following fauxlebrities made it out for the event:
- Omarosa: Clearly fresh from a long run, Omarosa made sure her right boob was placed much higher than her left. Sunglasses on her head really say, “I’m breezy and a bit of a douche…and I need to douche…..someone remind me later.”
- Tamera Mowry: Sister, Sister. Where’s the other one? I thought they were Siamese twins, no? What’s up with her face? Has she had some face work done? She looks Hawaiian. That remind me, I’m in the mood for Chinese. No idea.
- Stephanie Pratt: $10.00 you pull her wig off and it’s totally Spencer under there. Another $10 that you lift up her dress and Heidi’s swinging from his Donkey Kong Jr.
- Beverly Mitchell: If she’s not showing photos of Ruthie dancing sexy to Spirit in the Sky or if she’s not talking about the episode where Ruthie was dancing sexy to Spirit in the Sky I have no need for Beverly Mitchell to be there. Is 7th Heaven in reruns and, more importantly, did Beverly Mitchell literally just get out of the pool?
- Jamie Chung: Yeah, I didn’t either at first. Then I recalled that this was the chick from Real World San Diego that basically didn’t have a story line, except I’m pretty sure she discussed not liking her eyes and wanting to look more like an American girl. I’m not even joking. Are there any fact checkers out there? Someone find that out.