The Bravo A List Awards 2008. Sure.

Thanks to NYC event website I was given tickets to go to last nights Bravo A-List Awards. They filmed last night, but will be airing it on June 12th. Normally I don’t recommend things to watch unless it’s The Hills, but after the things I witnessed, I would definitely say you should check it out. Below is a bit of a recap of the night. I guess it’s a little spoilerish so if you are on the edge of your seat waiting to see who won, I wouldn’t read this, but trust me…who really cares.

  • Kathy Griffin was funny as always as swearing and giving the finger always cracks me up. If she had tossed in a fart or two I would have been on the floor. Kathy talked about showing a lot of behind the scenes things that other awards won’t let you see. By this she meant letting the cameras follow her into her wardrobe changing room to which she had 90 seconds to change outfits. Yup, she totally had the cameras follow her and we got to see her place this bag over her head and drop her dress while she was standing there in her bra and underwear as “workers” helped her get dressed. Good times.
  • They reunited the Housewives of NYC and the OC all on stage and it was awkward and not funny at all. They all tried to say cute little things that they were known for saying on their show and watching crazy-eyes Romona try to be funny was pretty much worth me going. As a side note, the Housewives of NYC got an insanely bigger applause than the Real Housewives of the OC. Interesting, yet not so.
  • So my whole reason for going was because Lauren Conrad was nominated for best female reality star or something and I figured this was my chance to either kidnap her or get on The Hills….whichever comes first. So they are announcing the nominees and when they say “Lauren Conrad: The Hills” I, like a 14 yr old school girl, shout out a “Yeeeeah!” all while the ENTIRE audience shout out a “Boooooo.” It wasn’t so much a “booo” as it was a “blahhhhhh.” No joke. I was shocked. Are people over LC and The Hills? They better not be….that’s my bread and butter!
  • Well, LC didn’t win her category. She lost out to Tila Tequila, who the audience was somehow happy with. I’m assuming Tila was trashed because she was a trainwreck on stage. She kept yelling into the microphone, “I still don’t know if I’m a lesbian.” And then she ended her “speech” by telling people to stop shoving their tongues down her throat when people meet her. At that point it was like “crickets crickets crickets.” As Tila exits the stage by Kathy, Kathy goes “Yeah congratulations Tila” and rolls her eyes. The audience lost their shit.
  • Spencer Pratt was also nominated for a reality award and was insanely boo’d when his name was announced. Sadly, he lost. Doh! All my “Hills” dreams for the night were ruined. Thanks Bravo.
  • Oh, the other thing is that the audience was legit like die hard Bravo fanatics. If someone from Bravo was on stage or if they showed someone who was on a Bravo show nominated for something the crowd completely lost their shit. It was insane. People were just literally yelling shit out while presenters and winners were on stage. I felt like I was sitting in the bleachers at Fenway during a Red Sox game. I almost started chanting “Yankees Suck, Yankees Suck.”
  • So when people from Project Housewives of the Runways Top Chef were on stage, again, people lost their shit. When Molly Sims comes onto the stage I clap and yell and everyone else couldn’t care less. I was sad for myself. Molly Sims looked really good, by the way. Recently she looked like she had something wrong with her face, but last night she looked hot. Although, I was sitting about 3,000 rows back. I called them my “Titanic Seats” meaning that if the place were to “sink” I would be the first to die.
  • Oh, and then while Kathy was making fun of Dina and Ali Lohan for blowing off the awards about 3 hours before they started, she decided that, like Ali, she was also going to release her own hip hop album. She starts rapping and, for some reason, Lance Bass comes out dancing and they reenact the Janet Jackson/Justin Timberlake SuperBowl performance and Lance rips of Kathy’s shirt and she has a fake rubber boobs hanging out. Sure, and old bit, but rubber boobs? Priceless. To return the favor Kathy rips off Lance’s pants and he’s standing their in his underwear. Again, the insane audience lose their shit.
  • I’ve already discussed the insanity that was Lauren Hutton during the show. Click here to read that mess again.
  • Finally, I also want to mention that the people who won the awards literally thought they were winning an Oscar. Some fashion chick that looks like Margret Cho, no joke, gave her thank you speech for about 6 minutes….minimum. Every person who wasn’t really a celebrity gave a speech like they had won the lifetime achievement award. I didn’t know who more than half the people were. I should expand my horizons.

I’m not sure how much of what I discussed will be shown since they taped 3 hours and will only air 90 minutes. So don’t get all pissy and send me hate mail telling me I’m a liar if you don’t see everything I wrote about. Geesh.

In conclusion the experience was a good one and there were some laughs. However, I won’t lie. By the time this event was over I wanted to go home, have a beer, pick up a hammer, build something, watch something on ESPN, and check out some porn. I needed to make sure I really still did have a penis. Just saying.

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