Nicole Richie Rehab: Why???

Why in the hell would Nicole Richie ever have to cart her ass to rehab? She seems totally fine, why? Oh I get it, she’s skinny. My friends at E! Online (they don’t know me) are reporting that Nicole’s publicist has said:

“She is working with a team of doctors and specialists whose focus is nutrition,” says the rep. “It is important to Nicole that she achieve this goal in a healthy way, [but] this is not a treatment for an eating disorder.”

What do they mean she can’t gain weight? Does crack keep the pounds off? Who knew?!?! Now, I’m definitely not a doctor or a nutritionist, but I have read multiple medical books and I guess there is some new treatment out there on how to add some weight to your body. It originated in a secret jungle and is now making waves in the United States. It’s called “food.” I know, odd. I guess what you do is you eat this substance called “food” and there are many different types of “food” to choose from. A doctor friend of mine told me that you put this “food” in your mouth and then use your teeth to chew the “food” and then you swallow it. I guess you’re supposed to repeat that process multiple times per day. I just hope that Nicole has the connections to the doctors and medical books that I’ve learned this information from.
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