So, as you can see, I’m disappointed in you. Your best bet would have been to show up at your press conference completely shit-house, wreaking of tequila, and swearing into the microphone. Bonus points if you attempt to pull off the Donald’s wig.
In conclusion, I hope you make better decisions for yourself in the future. Have a couple drinks, make out with Paris Hilton, show off a little of the stanky putanky, THEN go to rehab. Ride the wave baby because we’re already starting to forget about you.
Pasquale (Career Advisor to the Stars!)