Hey Stupids! Gotta Question for IBBB?

gottaquestion

 

IBBB is proud to present you with another installment of “Hey Stupids! Gotta Question for IBBB?” Here’s how this works. You have a question or need advice, you send me an email. I read it. I advise. Sometime, depending on my mood, I advice as well. Here are some recent questions/comments I’ve received. The names have been changed to protect the trashy.

Dear IBBB,
Even though you write an entertainment blog, I would love your take on the current recession and how we get out of it.

Signed,
The Economy

Dear The Economy,
Recession?  Recession!?  What country are you living in? Because if you live in the United States of the Americas you would know that not only are we not in a recession, but there is no such thing as a recession.  “Recession” is just a word that is made up by the people of Hallmark to sell greeting cards during Valentine’s Day.  At least, well, that’s what I’ve heard.  Now I’m not sure if the following numbers are accurate, but the homeless guy who lives outside of my building told me that 99.98% of people are out work and there are only 3 businesses left in the USA (Spencer’s Gifts, Red Lobster, and Brookstone).  If this is true I think I have a very simple solution for all Americans (sorry Canada) to follow.  Here goes it:  Either try to get a job or start your own business.  There you go.  Done and done.  Get creative when thinking of your own business to start.  You should think, “what is it that people need?”  Well, people need air.  So maybe start up a business that sells that.  Or maybe lease air to people.  I hear that’s how Bill Gates got all of his money.  What else?  People like sex still, right?  Well, sell sex.  Set up a lemonade-like stand and just stand there naked with your naughty bits hanging out and when someone drives by, just yell “sex for sale!”  I really think these things will get us out of a “recession” if we are in one.  You’re welcome.

I Should Own 55% of Your Business,
IBBB

 

Dear IBBB,
What are you going to dress up for this Halloween?

Signed,
a Ghost

Dear Ghost,
I’ll be dressing up, once again, this year as your mother.

Never Write Me Again,
IBBB

 

Dear IBBB,
You should be your own reality show.  I love your blog!

Signed,
IBBB Fan

Dear IBBB Fan,
That’s not a question.

Learn From This,
IBBB

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