Chase Crawford, Urine Laced Hair?

Hey ladies, ever wonder how your favorite Chase Crawford gets his hair so stylish, stylish and highlighted just right? Well the secret may be in the urine and the feces. However, before you ask your husband to take a dump on your head (again) you may want listen to this story first, Dirty Sanchez.

So, in the same night that me and my friends ran into Brody Jenner at STK in NYC on Friday night we also saw Chase Crawford come into the restaurant as well. He rolled in around 8pm, which was kind of early since we were all making fun ourselves for having the early bird special. Anyway, he was surrounded by a ton of girls and a few dudes to which we will later see him eating dinner with just at the bottom of the stairs that take you up to the bathroom. What’s odd is that upstairs there are a few private rooms, so good for him for sitting with the rest of us second class citizens.

Anyway, my buddy Mike and I head up to the bathroom to which we are talking out loud about a plan to get into a brawl with Brody Jenner and get ourselves on the cover of Us Weekly. Let me tell ya, after a ton of vodka and wine it really sounded like a brilliant plan. When we were putting this plan together we were alone in the bathroom with the exception of the bathroom attendant (who was laughing with/at us and our plan)…..and Chase Crawford who comes out of the side bathroom stall while we are washing our hands. He legit stands in front of the mirror for a good 10 seconds and keeps playing with this hair and rubbing his hands down the sides of his hair…..and he turns around to leave….without tipping the bathroom attendant….OR washing his hands. I followed him down the stairs hoping that I would have the chance to ask him if he was doing number 1 or number 2, but no luck. I’d assume # 2 b/c what dude goes in the stall for # 1…..unless you’re Lindsay Lohan and getting your fix of coke. Just pondering. Look if you’re not going to wash your hands, that’s your deal but if you’re famous and you know 2 drunken retards are not only looking at you, but are also crafting a plan on a way to get into Us Weekly, don’t you think you’d at least rinse one hand under the faucet?

As a side note, there’s a little thing call bathroom etiquette. Sure you don’t talk to someone while they’re going to the bathroom, but if you’re both at the sink area a simple head nod is customary….as is not rubbing piss in your hair. Maybe I’m just old-fashioned. I love living in New York. I’m hot on your trail next, Olsen Twins!
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