Charlize Theron Keeps Em Locked

Where in the sweet trenches of hell has Charlize Theron been lately? I’ve missed her. I was concerned. I forgot about her. Well she’s alive and well and attending the 2008 Seattle Film Festival recently and, from the looks of her, appears to be possibly doing a little “boom boom” in her dress and hoping no one notices. I’m fine with it. She’s hot enough that I’ll allow her to do Shasta McNasty in her dress and not even pass judgement.

Charlize was recently interviewed by W Magazine and stated, “I always knew that I didn’t want to get married….but always known that I’d be a mom from the time I was a little girl.”

Wait, really? How could she be a mom from the time she was a little girl? Doesn’t the tooth fairy have to show up at your house, let down her hair in order to see her shadow, and spin the dreidel on your forehead all while singing Christmas carols so that you can get your period in order to have a child? That’s how that happens right? That’s what the nuns taught me and nuns never lie….or shave their whoopty-doo! Ok, this post has gone right down the tubes. I’m done.
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