Carrie Underwood: Mean, Dumb, Yet Hot

I always thought that Carrie Underwood was dumb and hot, but now I can add “mean” to the list as well. According to some random that works for a country radio station Carrie Underwood could care less about dying children. So the story goes Carrie was supposed to be at the St Jude’s charity at the radio station trying to raise money for kids, but was in such a hurry that she just quickly read her line and moved on to the next radio station without taking any time while she was there. Feel free to read the rest of the email at the bottom of this post.

In the meantime, I’m not a big country music fan and was horrified when Carrie Underwood’s song “Before He Cheats” made on to mainstream radio. I gave it a chance and listened to the words and here’s what I heard:

“I dug my key into the side of his pretty little suped up 4-wheel drive,
Carved my name into his leather seat…
I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights,
Slashed a hole is all 4 tires…
And maybe next time he’ll think before he cheats.”

Um, yeah you sound both crazy and dumb. Maybe he cheated on you because you’re a bit of a psycho. You’re not too smart either. Why would you carve your name into his leather seat? Now he totally knows it was you who did it and your name is tied to the scene of the crime. Dumb move, crazy. You also had a Louisville slugger, a key, and a knife. How the hell were you carrying all that crap? Didn’t anyone see you walking up the street with all these “weapons” in your hand? I don’t know if “he’ll think before he cheats” as much as “he’ll do a criminal background check before he dates.” I hate to say this, Carrie, but I’m going to have to make a citizens arrest. Just put down the knife and the bat. Luckily you’re still hot, so I can look past you being dumb, crazy, and mean. Carry on.

Read The Rest of What Carrie Did

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