Buy That Little Bitch, Bindi

Oh that little bitch strikes again. Bindi Irwin and her fame-hungry PR team are finding new and innovative ways to help Bindi pretend that her dad never died all whilst still raking in the cash. Coming this September now you, too, can purchase your very own Bindi Irwin doll! Move over Barbie because this doll comes dressed in khaki shorts, binoculars, a camera, and some other outback gear. What a treat. Oh and it gets better. Just pull on Bindi and she’ll even say the following phrases: “Crikey!” “Let’s Go Help Wildlife” and “You Can Make the World a Better Place.” Wow, isn’t that optimistic. Life sucks, bitch.

Thanks, but I’m going to wait it out until they make a Teri Irwin doll that comes equipped with a bowl-cut-mullet and cameltoe khakis. That’s where my paper route money is going. Finally something to spend it on!

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