Brandy is Alive and Hasn’t Killed Anyone Today. It’s a Good Day to be Brandy.

Brandy, you’re a fine girl, what a good wife you would be. But, my heart belongs to the sea. Anyway, it’s about 8:47 AM and Brandy has yet to kill anyone. Not ready to laugh at vehicular homicide jokes so early? I don’t blame ya. Brandy was at that God-forsaken “American Girl Place” right here in sunny NYC yesterday looking for a doll with a five-head like hers. Ding ding ding! She’s found it.

Did you know Brandy also has a new single out? She does. Why would I say it if it weren’t true? Her new song is called “Right Here.” You should buy it at your local record store. Perhaps buy the tape of it so you can listen to it in your tape-deck or on your walkman or something.

To me, Brandy should just keep singing “Sittin’ Up in My Room” and “The Boy is Mine.” She shouldn’t sing anything else. Just those two songs.

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