I don’t know when this became the official “The Hills” blog, but somehow it has. According to a random drunken source via US Weekly, Lauren believes that it was Heidi Montard and Steve Sanders (yes I still refuse to use his real name) who started this rumor. Apparently Heidi Montard was the only cast member who didn’t reach out to Lauren after the sex tape rumor started. Lauren has said, “This has literally been, like, the worst week ever, and someone who’s supposedly my friend didn’t even call or text me.” Yup, she actually said that. I envision some head bobbing and “z-snaps” incorporated into that quote.
Steve Sanders then reached out to US Weekly to say, “It’s sad someone would make up something like that, and even sadder people think we had anything to do with it.” Yeah, that is sad. It’s also sad that you perm your hair and have 343 teeth in your mouth. That makes me sad too.
I say, if there’s a sex tape where are the receipts? Oh, and bonus points if you know where that is from. Seriously, let’s see the sex tape. With our luck it’s probably of Lauren’s sister, Breanna, or “Mask” as I like to call her.