Heidi Montag put on her biggest tightest cuffed jeans and trotted her horse ass on a little shopping spree at Elyse Walker the other day in sunny LA. It’s so odd how every store that Heidi trots into allows the paparazzi to come on in too. That’s nice of them. Usually the paparazzi are forced to stay outside, but not when Heidi Montag is involved. I bet she could solve that pesky Middle East crisis all with a touch of her chin.
Does anyone else think that Heidi is going to rot in hell? No really, anyone? Because I do. I mean, I’m sure to see her there, but she’s totally going to be there. I bet her hell will consist of blond weaves that are placed just a little bit to high for her to reach and she’ll spend eternity jumping and trying to reach them. Whilst doing this her fake rack is likely to knock her out. She’ll come to (giggity) and start jumping again…knock herself out….come to….start jumping. Lather, rinse, repeat.