


Product # 4 – That’s right you tell ’em! And when you do tell ’em make sure you’re still smiling. Now, thanks to the magic of pumps, tubes, and a rubber hand you can let everyone in your life know just what you think of them. Simply place the ridiculous hat on your ridiculous head and place the ridiculous pump in your ridiculous hand and ridiculously squeeze. Through this patent-pending technology you will be giving everyone the middle finger! That’s sweet. Now for those of you out there that can’t really tell what this hat is trying to do because of the big “censored” sign that they’ve placed over it… that would be the middle finger, which is an American tradition and symbol that basically says, “Hi neighbor! Would you like to come over for lunch?” You should try it out. Kids, wear it to school on “dress down day” and give a big salute to your douche-bag teacher! Now let me ask. What do you do with the pump when the finger is not in use? Does it just dangle off the side whilst your walk around? And how long is that tube because it’s nowhere near the hat. I mean, regardless of those two questions this is, most certainly, a very practical hat and well worth the money. Do me a favor, though, once you purchase it. Put it on, stand in front of the mirror, and squeeze the pump. Invite yourself over for lunch!