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That’s My Nana Lohan!

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So time to confess. Who tuned in to watch “Living Lohan” last night? You know you did. So did I. While most people were ready to trash it, I was ready for it to be my summer filler until The Hills comes back in August. Here are my thoughts on what went down on the first crapisode of “Living Lohan” which I will now be calling “That’s My Nana Lohan!”

I’m not going to lie, I’m sorta not impressed with their house. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice, but I figured they would be in this gaudy mansion that was filled with gold and marble and funded by Lindsay. It’s kinda like an extra large house decorated in 80’s chic. We learn a lot about Dina in the first 5 minutes, such as she has big nostrils, has a personal assistant, and reads the tabloids every morning because “she’s forced to” so she knows who to sue.

Why is everything in this episode blurred out? Everything on the kitchen counter is blurred out, the TV shows they’re watching are blurred out, the magazine Dina holds up is blurred out, the websites they’re looking at are blurred out. Legit, everything is blurred out…..everything except, Nana Lohan, who is my new favorite character on TV. I wouldn’t F with her. She’s like Yo Jong Kim…..only tougher.

You know how Tyra makes it a point on her show to always talk about herself? Yeah, well this show is sorta like that, but instead of talking about themselves they all constantly being up Lindsay. Constantly.

So is anyone going to mention that Ali looks like Helen Hunt or should I just do it? I don’t care that she’s 14…..she’s annoying. Her voice is killing me just when she talks so why would I want to hear it sing? Ugh, and listening to Dina confront the “record label” who also co-produce the show “Living Lohan” makes me want to slap Dina with a dead fish across the face. Ali wants to sing hip-hop and Dina wants to basically bang Jeremy the “producer” who she also manages and by manages I mean “does dirty boom boom with.”

Speaking of “Jeremy” what the hell was Dina talking about when she said she was online and he just randomly IM’d her and had no clue who he was. Uh, do you know how IM works? I doubt he just”guessed” Dina’s IM screen-name, although I’m sure it’s on every bathroom stall across LA and Long Island. This show is so staged. It really is like The Hills!

We get to follow Dina out to a restaurant to eat with some random judge, follow Dina taking random items out of her car such as cases of water and a bag of groceries, and basically just follow Dina around her life. Oh, and Ali is kinda in it to. For me, the highlight of the entire episode was when they announced that they Google themselves every day and read all the blogs. The good news for me is that IBBB is the #1 image search in Google when you Google “Nana Lohan.” Score! Hopefully Dina will be reading this and if she is, I love the show and want your IM screen-name. Can I interview Nana Lohan? I love her. How many freckles does Lindsay have? Why does Ali sound like Tony Danza? These are just some of the questions I would IM to Dina and ask Nana Lohan.

Oh, and other stuff happened in the show, but it’s pointless to write about…kinda like the show.

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