Paris Hilton Drunk = Useful Paris Hilton

Ah now here’s the Paris Hilton that really makes a difference in the world.  The sluttastic whorefaced drunken skankenheimer (allegedly) was celebrating the weekend in Brazil and doing a little liquor promotion when she apparently got bit my the “drunk bug.”  Odd.  I’ve never pictured Paris acting out of control.  She kinda looks like the […]

Hey Everyone! Paris Hilton Built a Website!

The Audrey Hepburn of our generation, Paris Hilton was all wonky eyes and Twister-like poses on the red carpet at the Vanity Nightclub at the Hard Rock Hotel in Las Vegas over the weekend promoting the launch of her new website ParisHilton.com.  Before I even go to it I’ll assume it’s all pink with diamond […]

Paris Hilton Heads to Social Studies at Immaculate Conception Grammar School

I must start this off, of course, by tossing in the photo of Paris slutting by the sign that said “Public Parking” and pointed right at her “gentlemen greeter.”  Jesus Claus totally has a brilliant sense of humor. I remember when I was in Catholic grammar school the nuns used to spend the majority of […]

Ugh. Like Sylvester Getting Full Custody of Tweety.

Someone get PETA on the horn because Paris Hilton and her boyfriend, DouK Reinhardt, purchased a couple of parrots whilst at a pet store in Hollywood, CA.  Terrible.  Why do I have a feeling all you’re going to here out of these two birds is, “Heyyyy betch.  Cawww.  You look good betch.  Cawwww.  Sure I’ll […]

Paris Hilton Still Thinks This Look is Cool, Even at Age 27

That is all. www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

Hi There Other Countries! Of Course You Can Bomb Us. I Understand.

Reason # 6,671,993 why other countries hate us. Paris Hilton, dressed in a blue dress with white stars all over it (trust me the missing red color was under her dress….trust me) showed up to spend a little time with David Letterman because, at the end of the day, Paris Hilton has the right to […]

This Time Last Year: Paris Hilton and Halloweenie

Happy Friday and welcome back to everyones favorite lazy segment called “This Time Last Year.” This Time Last Year will take a brief look at what was going on in the celebrity world…this time last year (go figure). Oh, and also I’m lazy so this is pretty easy to do on a Friday. Here’s what […]

I Dream of Herpes

Do do do do do do do. Do do do do do do do. Do do do do do do do do, do do do do do do do, do do do do do do do. Ba ba ba bum! Paris forgot she was 27 years old and dressed like this while at the Diesel […]

This Time Last Year: Paris and the Mini Whore

Happy Friday and welcome back to everyone’s favorite lazy segment called “This Time Last Year.” This Time Last Year will take a brief look at what was going on in the celebrity world…this time last year (go figure). Oh, and also I’m lazy so this is pretty easy to do on a Friday. Here’s what […]

We Almost Lost Paris Hilton

This Clip is in Quicktime. If You Don’t Have Quicktime, Too Bad. You really find Jesus at a time like this. Folks, we almost lost our national treasure (besides Heidi Montard) as Paris Hilton was leaving the Kate Somerville Skin Care Experts Salon in LA yesterday and almost fell down a flight of stairs. She […]

This Time Last Year: Paris Hilton

Happy Friday and welcome back to everyone’s favorite lazy segment called “This Time Last Year.” This Time Last Year will take a brief look at what was going on in the celebrity world…this time last year (go figure). Oh, and also I’m lazy so this is pretty easy to do on a Friday. Here’s what […]

Mr Miyagi Alive and Well!

Looky eye, always looky eye! Mr. Miagi of Miyagi-do Karate is alive and kicking and is ready to apparently live the simple life with Paris Hilton. He may have taught Danileson how to do the crane technique, but he’s moving on to bigger and better things such as teaching Paris how to not squint one […]

Paris Hilton Shoe Shopping Cameltoe

Ah good times. Clearly, it’s time to play everyones favorite game The ImBringingBloggingBack Cameltoe Rating System…to the Stars! You know the rating system, you can be awarded up to 5 camels. Paris Hilton and one of the male versions of The Olsen Twins were out and about doing a little pointless shoe shopping when all […]

Breaking Paris Hilton News

Breaking Paris Hilton News: Paris Hilton has now officially had everything in her mouth. What an accomplishment. After Paris’ trip to Shanghai for MTVs Style Gala she stopped by a restaurant to shove some more things down her throat. Paris was later quoted saying about Shanghai that the city “looks like the future.” Wow! It […]

Paris Hilton is F’n Stupid

Sorry, I couldn’t think of a better title then that one. Does Paris Hilton’s t-shirt say “I Heart Hoe Bags and Boys?” I guess it’s good to have self acceptance and, clearly, she is a Hoe Bag…or ho bag…whatever. At this point Paris is a caricature of herself. Besides being a consistent douche-bag or “bagadouche” […]

Happy Skankerween!

Happy Skankerween! A walking STD never looked so spookstacular! Paris Hilton has the most creative Halloween costume. Ahoy, whories! The SS Hilton is sure to go down at every house she stops by this Halloween season. Being on her knees bobbing for apples as never come in handy more than for this time of year. […]

Paris Hilton Just Keeps Giving

When I see Paris Hilton I typically think, “Now there’s a giver!” I also get itchy. Anyway, Paris Hilton wants to use her powers for good, not evil so she is carting her flat ass to Rwanda! While she’s there, Paris Hilton will stop by some schools and some health organizations for about 5-days during […]

Paris Has a Reverse Poshtoria

This may be old news by now, but is Victoria Beckham’s hairdo the new “Rachel?” Seems like it is. This time Paris is tackling that mess and really making it her own by taking basically the same style of our beloved Poshtoria and just reversing it and wearing it to the left. It’s great. It […]

Hey Look! Paris DID Make Your Little Girl Into a Whore! You Owe Me $50.00. Pay Up.

I don’t know how I missed this last week, but Paris Hilton was at the debut of her own denim and sportswear crap she made at Kitson in Beverly Hills. Now I’m not sure if this is the little girl from another country who actually made the clothes for about 13 cents an hour and […]

Celebrity Skanked Out F’d Up Report Card

A spin-off from everyones favorite game, “The ImBringingBloggingBack Celebrity Cameltoe Rating System…to the Stars” I am proud to present a new game called, “The ImBringingBloggingBack Celebrity Skanked Out F’d Up Report Card…to the Stars!” Current messed up celebrities have been chosen, categories have been determined, and hot dog clipart has been discovered. Mix all of […]