Why Does Britney Always Look Like She Itches?




That’s always something I can’t seem to figure out.  It’s like she looks itchy or looking at her I get itchy…something.  Her boots also look like they’re soaking wet on the inside and smell like the inside of a bowling ball.  Why can’t she ever seem to get it together?  More importantly, why do I care?  I’m going to see a therapist about this right away and by “therapist” I really mean “toilet.”

Britney Angela Mary-Jo Phylis Viola Spears was out in Calabasas, CA getting her nails done and a quick frozen beverage from Starbucks (who you know are thinking, “please just go to Dunkin Donuts” when she walks in) the other day.  Britney is still going strong with her 1995 Real Housewives of Orange County fake nails and Jennifer Aniston sweater pokies.  Eh, all is right with the world, I guess.  Well, except in Haiti.  That place is still a disaster.  Oh wait, Britney’s hair looks like Haiti.  Sweet, I’ll stop now.

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