It wouldn’t be a new week without a new “Britney Wants to Take a Dirt-Nap” rumor. This time around, Britney was allegedly suicidal last week following her custody battle over her two kids, “What’s His Face” and “The Other One.” It’s like a black cloud follows Britney. Maybe the bad luck is that bird hat that she’s always wearing. All Italians know that birds are bad luck. All Italians. I’ve polled all of them and they all answered…and they all said, “yes birds are bad luck.”
So the rest of the article about Britney is even funnier because “a close friend” claims that she is going to try to get back with KFed so he drops the custody battle and if that doesn’t work she’s going to take the kids and flee to Cuba. Ohhhh I totally hope it’s the second option. I’d love Britney to be in Cuba. Oh, or Greenland. That would be great!