At some point the crazy-train always makes its final stop in New York City. Well CHOO-CHOO! It is rumored that Britney will be relocating to NYC and may be buying a $9 million loft in the West Village. Great! Maybe I’ll see her. I mean, I’m sure my $14.00 studio apartment will be located somewhere near her. Hell, I’m within walking distance to Lindsay Lohan’s new apartment. Therefore I have a message for all the ex-drinkers and “gentlemen greeter” flashers of the world. I can smell you from here. I’m hot on your trail. You want to try to escape the paparazzi and the stalkers of LA? Well best wishes because you’ve just been added to my list. You think the Olsen Sluts walk through this city without looking over their bony-malnourished shoulders every 2 blocks? Doubtful. Welcome to NYC, Britney, I’ll be looking for you. And you can be sure as hell that you’ll help me sellout by getting pregnant with my bastard child. Cheers!