“This current spate of reunions has given us ideas. Despite what people say we are all still really close. A couple of weeks ago Beyonce did a show in Los Angeles and asked me and Michelle (Williams) to join her on stage for Survivor. It was a real tearjerker. The fans were crying and going nuts. I’d definitely like us to do more stuff like that. As ever, Beyonce and I will spend Christmas Day together. It will be a real family affair.
Yes, Kelly, you will be joining Beyonce for Christmas Day, but I would double check your plans because I believe that Beyonce has hired you for service. Probably clean up and food prep. Eh, it’s not that bad. At least you’ll get to work in a mansion and rub elbows and mustaches with Tina Knowles.
I’ll be waiting for the announcement of a Destiny’s Child reunion. In honor of that I will play “Say My Name, Say My Name” on repeat in my CD player and will sing “Bootylicious” to every fatass that I see on the street. You’re welcome Kelly, you’re welcome.