America’s Next Top Model: Paint & Poses

Please welcome back America’s Next Top Model resident recapper here at IBBB, Jenny. Here’s what J-Dog said went down on last nights America’s….Next….Top….Model.
  • What does Claire’s tank top say? Does it say I love Labor Labor? Or does it say I love Gabor Gabor? I can’t make out the first letter.
  • And here is Benny Ninja, all lit up in his ridiculous glory. Honestly, this show is getting a little de ja vu. Honestly, this show is getting a little de ja vu. Can’t they dig up some new nuts in the fashion world?
  • Cue the obligatory fight over the phone. Blah blah blah, I need to talk to my kid. Blah blah blah, you’re disrespectful. Blah Blah blah, you’re a racist. Down by the shores of the hanky panky…where the bullfrogs jump from bank to banky….because that has as much significance as anything else here.
  • The girls head to Brooklyn and meet up with super model Vendela. It’s a pose off. Is that a thing? Oh even better. It’s like a dance battle. Head to head….How Electric Boogaloo.
  • Claire is the individual pose winner. She wins a trip to Bora Bora. Her team wins overall. They win swag. Oh but it’s good swag, like sunglasses, purses, jewelry. Not typical office swag, like you won a sales contest so here’s some leftover mugs with the company name and a lame ass mini rubber chair to put your cell phone in. Oh and don’t forget these pens that say President’s Club 2001.
  • When the girls get back to the house, Fatima continues to practice posing. Other girls are drinking 40’s. Do people still drink 40’s? I think the last time I drank a 40 was in 1993 before a local carnival. There’s nothing like drinking a 40 and riding the thunderbolt while “Stroke Me” blares.
  • It’s photo shoot time! This week’s shoot is close ups. But it wouldn’t be a Tyra shoot without some nonsense. So, they squeeze and dump paint on the girls’ heads. I say kick it up a notch. Throw these girls on a pottery wheel and turn them into spin art.
  • After a painful deliberation (painful for me, not the judges) Marvita is asked to go home. Are we surprised, really? Do you think she’s pissed that she let Tyra give her a mullet, only to be sent home? Some things to think about…
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