Isn’t American Idol quite the wholesome family show? The singing, the dancing, the audience applause. Well you sick rat bastards did you know that one of your favorite American Idol contestants, David Hernandez, used to show his dingleberry and bum for money? Yup. Rumor has it that David used to work as a stripper at “Dick’s Cabaret” in sunny Arizona and would “do the lapdances” the kids like on a mostly male crowd. Now, no judgements but didn’t Frenchie Davis have pictures of herself in a bra that also doubled as tarp at Fenway Park on a website and she got the boot for it? There is no word yet if this rumor is true or if David gets the boot, but I’m thinking that American Idol may take part in big boob discrimination, one of the earliest types of discrimination I believe. Supposedly there are pictures of David out on the Internet, but that’s just one Google search I’m not ready to perform. I’ll stick to cameltoe, hoo-ha flashes, and the occasional upskirt, but dingleberry postings is a line I’m not ready to cross.
Oh by the way, my favorite line of the article that I found this information on was an interview by the strip club manager that said, “Bryan said he was aware that Hernandez was a vocalist, but that Hernandez never sang at the club.” Really? He never sang? Any strip club that I went to always had the girls belting out tunes, as that is what most people there are there for…no?