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Back by popular demand is another fresh segment of IBBB’s “Am I Wrong?” Sometimes it’s nice to stray away from reality shows and really think about some stuff. Yeah, stuff. Deep. Plus, as a thank to all of those who took part in the Celebrity Twitter Bomb, it’s the least I could do. Sorry, in advance.
- Why are there alarmist commercials about daring to mix Allegra with orange juice? Seriously, the dude in the commercial is awkwardly trying to save the life of the Allegra user by basically knocking the glass of orange juice out of her hand. He’s like, “You KNOW you can’t mix Allegra with orange juice….RIGHT!?!” I mean Jesus she’s not trying to down a cup of poison. And what did orange juice ever do to you? How come suddenly orange juice is the new “high fructose corn syrup” scandal of 2010? It’s like, how dare you try and take you allergy meds in the morning with orange juice, like an animal! I take Tylenol with beer. Am I wrong?
- Someone like Aaliyah is never coming back, but someone like Lohan keeps grabbing the brass ring. Am I wrong?
- “Think about the earth before you print this email.” Why do people feel the need to add that to their email signature? Who the F is printing out emails? That’s why it’s “email” and not hand delivered mail. If I wanted a hard copy of the stupid chain-letter about National Gas Out Day that you sent me I’d ask you to write it in your best cursive, toss a stamp on it, and throw it in the mailbox. And, not for nothing, are you the boss of my body? I’ll print what I want, when I want to, and how many I want to. In fact, I might print it in color and then just shred it for the hell of it. I’m crazy like that. And while we’re on “helpful suggestions” in our signature, I might add “think about my health so wash your hands after using the bathroom.” Am I wrong?
- Know what I’m not good at? “Points” when you go food shopping. I have no idea how this works. It’s some math formula that only NASA can decode. All I know is that the cashier angrily asks me if I’m collecting points in a complete rage every time I’m at the grocery store and after like 2 yrs of scanning this card in over 400 visits they’re finally like “You wanna use your points on the bananas?” And I save 49 cents. Meanwhile they now have enough personal info on me to assume my complete identity. Am I wrong?
- “Check this out! This girl killed herself after her dad posted this on Facebook about her! Click here to see it!” Really? You know what, I’m going to take a pass or, perhaps, the physical challenge because if this shiz even is 1% true and this chick dirt-napped herself why the hell would I want to see it? Is this like one of those things from the late 90’s where they claim if you email it to 12 of your friends the Taco Bell dog will appear on your screen and do a quirky dance? If so, I might be in. Am I wrong?
Well that concludes another segment of “Am I Wrong.” Am I Wrong was brought to you by “Pitocin” and the letter “burp.”
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