Oprah Opens a Second School; Has Cameltoe


Blessed Mother Oprah Winfrey has opened up a second school in South Africa, which is an environmentally friendly school and an Oprah friendly school. I don’t know what that means. The school which is named, “Seven Fountains Primary School” was funded by her Angel Network. Oprah declared, “The Seven Fountains School is an example of what schools in South Africa can become.” Yeah, they can become that if rich and famous talk-show hosts build them. No pressure Ricki Lake.

As Oprah opened the school to a packed audience teachers and students chanted, “Long Live Oprah, long live!” No joke, they actually said that. The skies then opened and God raised up Oprah, pushed aside Jesus and allowed Oprah to sit “at the right hand of the Father.” God then hi-fived Oprah and she taught God how to “z-snap” just like Tyra Banks. Heaven must be a real hoot. I’ll fill you in on what hell is like…eventually.

Seriously, as much as I want to joke, this really is a great thing that Oprah has done. She’s a great example of what someone with money can do and not be afraid to do. She literally is making a difference in so many peoples lives. I mean, not mine, but whatever. However, just because Oprah is doing these “good deeds” does NOT mean that she can escape my “IBBB Cameltoe Rating System….to the Stars!

Nice try Oprah, but you’ve been captured with “the camel” all the way over in South Africa. Seriously, this must be the richest cameltoe alive. Am I a bit jealous? Sure. I give this 3 out of 5 camels. Oprah really made this one her own.

As a side note, is it ironic that in the picture of Oprah with her hands up consists of dark black storm clouds over the children, yet bright and sunny skies directly over Oprah? I don’t think so. I told you she has some type of deal with God!

As a second side note, a friend was text messaging me while I was writing up this story and when this friend asked me what I was doing I replied, “just adding camels to Oprah’s cameltoe.” Seriously, who says that? Nobody. I guarantee that sentence has never been said before. Ever.

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