More Mindless Stories on ‘whitney houston’
Oct
19
19
If Whitney Is Back, Where Are the Receipts
Posted by IBBB
whitney houston 
If Whitney Houston made a comeback last night where are the receipts? I wanna see the receipts. Let me get one thing straight, Diane, comebacks are cheap. I don’t do comebacks. Comebacks are cheap. Comebacks are whack. Ok I’m done. Anyway, the original celebrity trainwreck, Whitney Houston, made a very top secret appearance last night at Swarovski Fashion Rocks in London. I guess it really was a big secret. They flew Whitney out of NYC and dropped her ass off in London and she made an appearance on stage to introduce the final runway show while her friends Patti La Belle and Sugababes performed horrific song, Lady Marmalade.
What a real treat/who cares. I’m sorry, but it’s not possible for me to see Whitney Houston without thinking of that kick-arse Diane Sawyer interview from a few years back and also that skit from Mad TV of Whitney “screwing up the hits.” See below…still just as funny.
May
14
14
Whitney Houston Back to Crack?
Oh I hope this is true! Nobody finds a sober Whitney Houston interesting. I certainly don’t. At Stevie Wonder’s surprise 57th birthday party in the Bahamas, Whitney Houston showed up allegedly looking stoned and her eyes were all red. I mean this was from one drunken source at the surprise party, but I’m taking that as the gospel. As a side note, people were wondering how Stevie’s wife pulled off the surprise and got him on a plane to the Bahamas. Uh…er…um…not to be mean or anything, but isn’t Stevie blind? How difficult of a task could that have really been? I mean, she could have told him that they were in the bathroom and really had been on the plane. Speaking of which, do people at a blind person’s surprise party even have to hide or do they just stand there in front of him and yell surprise? This gets me to thinking, I wonder if anyone ever had a surprise party for Helen Keller? I mean, she was blind and deaf. How would they surprise her? Maybe all the guests would just shake her arm or something. Hmm, that’s one for the great philosophers to ponder.
Anyway, back to the party. Other special guest besides an allegedly stoned (yet more fun) Whitney included: Janet Jackson, LaToya Jackson, Sean Connery, Spike Lee, Claire Daines (really?), Tim Allen (huh?), Gayle King, among others that I don’t feel like typing.
Jan
16
16
Whitney Wants Some of That Brandy Money
Posted by IBBB
whitney houston 
While Brandy was busy sitting up in her room (insert fake laugh here), her little brother Ray J was having a little dinner date with Whitney “hell to the broke” Houston. Some people are saying that they were getting very cozy while eating at Maestro in Beverly Hills (90210), but I think there is a much different story here. Whitney is kinda broke, or so they say, and Brandy is still collecting checks from old episodes of “Moesha.” I think Whitney is scheming to get her hands on some of that “Brandy money.” Now, before I get the hate mail on this, I don’t care that Whitney is 43 and Ray J is 25. I don’t care that she is older. I don’t care. So please, save the emails or comments to me that say I wouldn’t be talking about this story if he was older than her. Let’s get one thing straight here. I’m talking about this story because I’ve always wanted to reference “Moesha” on my blog and I finally got to. Good day.
Jan
09
09
Whitney to Rosie: Hey Fatass!
Even when Whitney tries to clean up her act, her crazy-ass past comes back to visit…and I’m grateful it does! Back in the day Whitney once told Newsweek Magazine that Rosie O’Donnell was a “fat bitch.” Seriously, I love that. I mean, it’s not because she’s attacking someones weight, but more so because it just came out of Whitney Houston’s mouth. I say, if she’s so fat where are the receipts?
Allison Samuels, veteran Newsweek corespondent, is writing a book titled, “Off the Record” and is claiming that Whitney called Rosie a “fat bitch” after Rosie once implied that Whitney had a drug problem. Allison Samuels and Newsweek decided not to use the quote at the time because they felt that it could damage Houston’s career and because she was “not in her right mind.” However, I guess they think it’s ok to use the quote now because there’s a book to sell. I say sell out and sell out big! That’s my motto!
Jan
04
04
Whitney’s Crack is Whack & For Sale!
Posted by IBBB
whitney houston 
Oh hell to the yes! Now you too can be just like Whitney Houston. According to Page Six Whitey is selling clothes, including some bras and underoo’s at an auction in Irvington, NJ next week. Looking for something a little more pricey than just the underwear that covered Whitney’s whack crack? You’re in luck because she is also selling her Dolce & Gabbana bra, a bunch of evening dresses (that probably have puke on them), and 16 wardrobe cases (that also probably have puke in them). She’s also selling some drums, pianos, and a slot machine! Oh yeah? If she’s selling all this stuff, where are the receipts? Bonus points for those of you who remember that reference.
