More Mindless Stories on ‘whitney houston’

Whitney Continues Her, “Eh, F*ck It” Tour

It’s the comeback that just won’t come back.  Well, it came back, but then it went back somewhere else.  Maybe  a crack den.  I’m not good with the map.  Anyrasp, Whitney Houston continues to butcher the classics and, at this point, it kinda seems like Whitney is in on the joke.  You can hear her singing like a bird who just drank a can of Coke and downed a packet of purple Pop Rocks whilst on tour in London the other night.

I believe it’s in the first 17 seconds that you can tell Whitney (and the crowd) is thinking, “Can you even believe this sh*t right now?  Ha hoooow!”  However, the real gem comes around 3 minutes and 45 seconds when Whitney is busy taking a few Hail Mary breathes as some random chick in the crowed starts yelling, “Come on, hit it.  Hit it!” and then it happens.  The moment we’ve all been waiting for during “I Will Always Love You.” And, well, Whitney doesn’t disappoint.  I mean she doesn’t come close to hitting that note, but at this point it would really be a disappointment if she did.

Me personally, I’d rather watch the Whitney below screwing up the classics:

Whitey Houston, Like Lindsay Lohan, is “Feeling Great!”

With recent news that Whitney Houston needed to postpone a bunch of European tour dates, there is a ton of speculation that Whitney has relapsed and this is the reason why she had to spend some quality time in a hospital in Paris.

Well Whitney is not going to take the rumors laying down.  Oh hell to the no!  She refuses to let the public look at her like the evil eyes that Bobby Brown painted on her bedroom wall staring at her.  Therefore, once Whitney was released from the hospital she told People Magazine, “I’m feeling great.  I’m just ready to move on and continue my world tour. My health is terrific…but this is a time when I get a lot of allergies.“

Right.  Allergies.  I get raspy this time of year too, Whitney.  I sneeze a lot and my eyes get all itchy and red.  I suck up a lot of snot since my nose runs like a faucet and I typically feel groggy.  However, due to your “track record” if this really is allergies, where are the receipts?  Show me the receipts.  I’d like to meet the person who claims they’re selling me $700,000 worth of allergy medicine.  Where are the receipts?  Owww owww!

If This is Whitney Houston at the Clive Davis Grammy Party, Where are the Receipts?

I’m not saying nothin’ about nothin’, but Whitney looks high as a kite.  Mama’s looking more like Sissy Houston and Dionne Warwick more and more each day.  Regardless (or “irregardless” depending on where you’re from), Whitney Houston was at the Clive Davis Grammy Party on Saturday night and was said to be in great spirits.  I’m sorry, but I can’t not look at Whitney and think about that brilliant, brilliant, brilliant, brilliant, Diane Sawyer interview.  You know, the one where she said that crack was cheap and she doesn’t smoke crack….and then Diane Sawyer said it’s rumored that she has a $700,000 drug addiction to which Whitney laughed and replied, “Haha oh yeah?  If I was doing all those drugs where are the receipts?  Show me the receipts, Diane.”  Awesome.

If This is Whitney Houston’s New Song, Where are the Receipts?

2 things leaked this weekend. Me. And Whitney Houston’s alleged new song with Akon that is likely to be released on her new album this fall. I say if this is Whitney’s new song, where are the receipts, Diane? I wish. I wish Whitney leaked her new song. Show me the receipts. That joke never gets old with me.

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Suddenly Dionne Warwick is the Voice of Reason?