More Mindless Stories on ‘nicole richie’
Mar
02
02
Nicole Richie’s Ring Makes Her Look Fat
Posted by IBBB
nicole richie 
Alert! Alert! Alert! Nicole Richie may be off the market and I don’t just mean supermarket, I mean market market. Like “singles market.” I don’t even know what that means. I’m tired. There are rumors being blown around like Nicole Richie on a windy day that she is getting engaged to boyfriend Joel Madden of Good Charlotte (no relation to Charlotte Church…I don’t think). Those two crazy kids were spotted at a jewelry store not too long ago and, while Nicole did by a necklace, they also looked at engagement rings. No fast forward to present time (or like 24 hours ago) and Nicole was spotted wearing this ring. Da-da-duuuuun. Seriously, this is the worst news ever. I mean, I don’t mean “bad news,” I mean like most boring news. I only decided to post this story for the following reasons:
- Ability to make a Nicole Richie weight joke
- Ability to make a Nicole Richie weight joke
- Ability to incorporate Charlotte Church into a story
- Ability to take my photoshop skills to the next level by “blowing up an image and making the border blue.”
- Ability to make a Nicole Richie weight joke
Feb
22
22
Is It Wrong When Mischa is the Fat One?
The title for this one was really hard for me. I mean, should I go with, “Is It Wrong When Mischa is the Fat One?” or should I have gone with “3 Bitches on the Beach?” There are just so many tough choices to make in life. Anyway, Nicole Richie and Mischa Barton were enjoying their long walk on the beach in Malibu with Nicole’s dog. By the way, what’s up with the Inspector Gadget hat? It always reminds me of something that Freddy Krueger would wear.
Mischa has had some tough breaks lately. First, her younger sister Britney’d herself into rehab and then shortly later Mischa crashed Nicole Richie’s car into another car. Ok, well not so much a crash as it was a bump, but “crash” just seems better. Mischa had just dropped off Nicole at the tanning salon when she bumped the other car and seemed pissed as she had to pull into a gas station to exchange papers with the other driver. Seriously if I was the other driver and Mischa Barton hit me in my car I would have either fallen out of my car or thrown myself through the windshield. That would have been my 15 minutes of fame. That’s it, the next time I’m in LA I’m just going to drive around all day and wait to be hit.
Jan
31
31
Is It Just Me or Is Nicole Richie Fat?
I actually would like to applaud Nicole Richie for doing her best “lollipop” impersonation. Wasn’t Nicole working on gaining weight? Maybe it’s the photos from “ParisExposed” of Nicole eating coke off of a plate that made her lose her appetite. Yeeeeah, I’ll go with that. Regardless of what type of lollipop head syndrome (LHS) that Nicole is suffering from, she and Paris spent some time at Mr Chow’s for a little din-din. In Paris Hilton news, Paris has filed a federal lawsuit to have “ParisExposed” shut down and she wants her junk back. She also wants her virginity back, but you can’t reverse that crap. You know what? I’m filing a federal lawsuit to have Paris Hilton shut down. I don’t mean the website, I actually mean her.
Who Shot Those Two!?
Who Shot Those Two!?
Jan
10
10
Nicole Richie Goes from 10 to 12 Yr Old
Posted by IBBB
nicole richie 
Nicole Richie really knows how to fill out a bikini….YOWZA! Woo-Hoo! For a minute I thought that was Anna Nicole on the beach, but “nope” it’s Nicole Richie! Ok, ok so I know I’ll get hate mail since Nicole is clearly trying to gain a few pounds. She definitely is looking better and I’m really happy that she’s taking her weight issues seriously. I mean, millions of little girls are looking up to her as a role model so I think she is doing a much better job at portraying a healthy body image. I wish Nicole continued success on her weight issues and speedy recovery!
And….End Scene!
And….End Scene!
Ok, so which part of the above commentary did you like better? The first part about Anna Nicole or the “positive feedback” on Nicole Richie? Yeah, being nice is definitely not as fun. I actually fell asleep halfway through writing that.
Have another hamburger, fatass.
Jan
05
05
Nicole Richie Matches Everything
Posted by IBBB
nicole richie 
When you’re rich, famous, and have a personal stylist it’s important that you match everything that you wear to everything around you. Wait, it is right? At first I was thinking that Nicole was just going for her typical “fortune teller” look, but then I realized it was exactly what she needed to color coordinate her surroundings.
In other, equally random, Nicole Richie news it’s been reported that Nicole has hired a Shaman to help get rid of her bad luck curse that she feels hangs over her. She has told friends that she feels all the crap that happened to her in 2006 were because someone “hexed” her. Oh crap, she’s onto me! So, in order to cleanse herself and her apartment, Nicole paid a doctor $1,000 to perform a spiritual cleansing. Now that is money well spent! Oprah spends her money on opening a school for girls to help change their lives and Nicole spends it on an apartment exorcism. Cool!
