Jessica From Laguna Beach Arrested

Posted by IBBB

Seriously, Jessica will still do whatever it takes to get with Jason from Laguna Beach. This time, she’s mimicked his arrest when she was busted on suspicion of felony driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Allegedly, Jessica crashed into an Acura on the Santa Ana Freeway and caused “great bodily injury” to people in both cars.

The reports that was filed claimed that her level of intoxication, unsafe speed, and wet roads caused the crash. Are they sure it was the camera crew in her car? Jessica is sitting in an Orange County jail on 100,000 awaiting her court date. I wonder if she’ll bring Jason?

Who Said That!?!

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Mar
06

MTVs Kristen Cavallari Thinks I’m Dumb

Posted by IBBB

kristen cavallari, laguna beach, mtv

…well she may be right. Yeah, I’m kinda dumb. Anyway, Kristen Cavallari of MTVs Laguna Beach was recently in GQ and, of course, the interview headed in the direction of asking all about Laguna Beach. Sweet! It’s not like the reruns are enough anyway. Before I even get into the interview portion I want to go back on the record of saying that Kristen is way hotter than Lauren. Now don’t get me wrong, Lauren is hot, but Kristen is hot in that sorta “I’m a bitch and am gonna kick your ass” kind of way. Wait, is the just me? I digress.

So, when Kristen was asked if Laguna Beach was scripted she responded by saying:

“I don’t see Laguna Beach as a reality show. The producers would say ‘Kristen come here at this time and have lunch with this person and talk about this. Ask him this specific question.’ In one scene my hair is short and then the next scene it’s down to here. How does anyone not notice that?”

Wait did she just call me stupid? I never really noticed that, but I did notice that about 90% of the show was just facial expressions and those facial expressions never really matched up with what the other person was saying. I just assumed the producers taped the cast performing over 1,000 facial expressions and then just edited them into the various scenes. Or…is that not what producers are responsible for?

Kristen continued on later in the interview by saying that, MTV came into Laguna Beach and corrupted it. Do you smell that Kristen? Yeah, that smell is the bridge that you just burned. I would NEVER do that to MTV or say that to MTV. Yes, my friends, this is where we bring things back to me. I would be the best MTV employee ever. You hear me MTV? BEST employee EVER. See me HERE.

Read the Rest of Kristen’s Interview

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Mar
06

MTV Family News: Jason Wahler Arrested Again; Less Known Laguna Beach Cast Members Jealous

Posted by IBBB

jason wahler, laguna beach, mtv

Jason Wahler of MTV’s Laguna Beach and several episodes of MTV’s The Hills was tossed in the slammer after he was caught drinking at a bar in North Carolina underage. The bar where the sting operation took place was called “Rumors” and poor Jason could not show the proper identification when police had requested it. Allegedly Jason began to shout swears at the cops and spent a little quality time in jail before he was bailed out on $1,000 bail.

I wonder if all the episodes of Laguna Beach in which Jason was seen drinking while high school tipped the cops off? Look I don’t pass judgement on this as we’ve all been there. Well, not in North Carolina, necessarily, but drinking underage at a bar. Although I’ve never been stupid enough to not at least have a fake ID with me. You hear that kids? Fake ID. Be smart.

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Nov
16

Laguna Beach 3, RIP

Posted by IBBB

laguna beach

R.I.P Season 3, R.I.P.

It’s graduation day for some of the kids of Laguna Beach and you know what that means! There are only a few more times that Cami can show her boobs. How sad. In the first 10 minutes alone Cami’s boobs were falling out of her tennis shirt. Later at graduation, Cami had on this “shirt” that basically just covered the lowest part of her boobs (just directly above her waist). Oh Cami, I can’t wait for next season when you graduate and you can put your tassel somewhere else besides your cap.

Graduation also consisted of Cameron and Kyndra getting into a fight about “standing up” and “cheering” for the graduates. Yeah, no that’s really what they were fighting about. I almost forgot to say my obligatory, “I’m getting too old for this shit.”

Next up, Cameron has a “beginning of summer” bbq that even included a slideshow. Really? Who does that? Kyndra fake cried and even more shocking was the Cami’s boobs actually were inside her shirt. Maybe they were sick?

Later, Breanna wrote Rocky a love letter basically blaming herself for the fall out of their friendship. Breanna basically begs for her friendship back. I hope Rocky says no. Breanna is boring and she looks like Mask. But, Rocky doesn’t take my advice and she goes to Breanna’s mansion. Then, it gets awkward. I wonder if Breanna wants to make up so she can get some more camera time next season. I would if I were her. Breanna is a girl genius!

Uh, yeah and Tessa didn’t take the news to well that Rocky and Breanna were becoming friends again. Rocky totally traded down.

Breaking news: Cameron and Jessica go to the beach and feeling “glum” Cameron asks if Jessica ever thinks she would turn into his girlfriend. Typically Jessica would be all dysfunctional and throw herself at him and then yell at him, but this time she said “no.” She didn’t think she would ever be his girlfriend. I think, I think that may be a sign of the end of the world.

In conclusion, Alex gave Rocky a ring that kinda looked like a cross between a seahorse and a lady bug. I have to be honest, I threw up a little in my mouth.

And so ends another season of Laguna Beach. I am dumber because of it. Thanks MTV.

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Nov
09

Laguna Beach Makes Me Dumb

Posted by IBBB

laguna beach

Yeah! 1 hour of Laguna Beach kills 25% of my braincells. It’s prom season for the gang of Laguna Beach, which means that all the guys must find new and inventive ways to ask the girls to the prom. Let’s see we have:

Burying yourself in sand and putting a gift box over your head
Adding your and your date’s name to the front of a movie sign
Dressing your dog up with a prom shirt
Tattooing the word “prom” across your chest
Placing “lays” all over the volleyball net with a bunch of red balloons and sign

Clearly these jackasses must have got confused and thought they were asking these girls to be their wives. Seriously, I’ve seen less intense marriage proposals. I mean, when I asked my prom date to go with me I just called her and asked her…and then told her she was pregnant. I really like to pack a two-for-one deal with these things.

Oh, did I mention the episode started with Tessa and Rocky rocking the ballet outfit cameltoe? Yup, it’s true. Do they still offer ballet classes to girls who are 17? Did they get kicked out of the “Brownies?” I literally cringed with embarrassment when I watched them dance.

Anyway, Rocky and Alex are quasi back together and are heading to the prom, which means that Rocky is going to need to add some extra white-trash extensions to her fright-wig that she’s rockin’. At one point it literally looked like Rocky had two wigs on…one wig on top of another wig. She doubled up on her wigs.

Perhaps the best quote of the night Cami was getting ready for the prom and she said she looked like a hooker. Her “good friend” Kyndra corrected her and told her she looked like a glamorous hooker. I would have said she looked like Miss Piggy in a slip, but maybe I’m not a great friend.

So the prom lasted about 15 seconds and then it was onto the after party. Rocky freaks out, cries, talks about being a princess and end scene.

Episode 2 is all about Chase’s band. Oh and Lexi’s dad takes the girls out on his boat, which includes Breanna (Mask), Lexi, some other randoms, and Cami. Yup, Cami. I literally did a double take because I couldn’t figure out why she was there. Maybe they were going to use her as an anchor. No one can know for sure. Later Cami and Kyndra hop in the Range Rover and head to LA to watch the band at the Roxy, but not before Cami sings “Barbi Girl” with (yes you guessed it) her boobs hanging out.

So the whole gang makes it to The Roxy to see the band play…well Tessa missed most of it because she had Derek’s tongue down her throat. I hope he doesn’t catch the allergy that put her in the hospital! Later the band gets signed to Epic Records. Seriously? Weren’t they just singing at Tessa’s birthday party? Damn it, maybe if I sang at her birthday party I would be signed to Epic Records. Oh wait, I can’t sing. Do you think Epic signs blogs? Yeah, I didn’t think so. So when the guys started telling people that they got signed to the record deal no one seemed excited at all. Everyone was like, oh that’s great. I would bottle my friends if they weren’t more excited for me.

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