More Mindless Stories on ‘kelly cutrone’
Look who’s playing all camera shy? Blessed Mother Kelly Cutrone (of the SoHo Cutrone’s) tried running out of the picture that was being taken of Peaches Geldorf at the Nylon Magazine Young Hollywood Party that was held at the Roosevelt Hotel in LA the other night. I have no idea what a Peaches Geldorf is, but I am (of course) pissed off that Kelly Cutrone was at another party that I wasn’t invited to. So rude. It’s like she doesn’t even know me any more. Well it’s almost summertime in NYC so I’ll be waiting for personal invites in the very near future.
Kelly Cutrone wasn’t the only one of your favorite MTV fauxlebrities that stopped by the Nylon party. Nope. Check out Whitney Port, Kristin Cavallari, and Stephanie Pratt below. You’re welcome.
…because she’s going to adding Youtube clips to her Pubic Revolution account until Bravo finally confirms a 2nd season of Kell on Earth. See what I did there? I made it seem like I had turned on Kiki Cutrone-trone, but I have nothing but love for her and her troop of sweatshop workers/interns.
This time around we get to see Kiki and Andrew Mugawhore quickly yell into the camera about clothes that they’ve bought and how they miss not having a TV show. They yell into the camera the same way my sister and I would when we were about 8 and 12 at a wedding reception in the 80’s. It was brilliant then and, well, it’s brilliant now.
Since Kelly and crew refuse to have me have anything to do with their show, perhaps they’ll reconsider having me split a 30 pack with them all while we tape it for YouTube to show the dangers of stalker drinking. And, well, if then I can convince them to knock over a 7-11 with me and pee on the street corner then all the better.
Blessed Mother Kelly “Kiki” Cutrone will, literally, be about 3 stops on the A Express Train from my apartment in NYC and assuming all restraining orders are null and void in the new year I may just go and see her. You see, My Little Kiki Cutrone will be holding a book signing on February 2nd at 7pm at the Barnes & Noble in Lincoln Center for her new book, “If You Have to Cry…Go Outside.”
Is this something that I should live blog? Is there an after-party I need to know about? Do I wind up in prison if I show up to this? I’m not sure of the rules. All I know is that Kell on Earth starts up on Feb 1st on Bravo and then Kelly Cutrone is signing books the next day just minutes from my apartment. Should I invite her over for a beer? A 30 pack?! It’s all coming together now! Maybe she’ll finally want to add me to her new show where I just follow her around all day giving her hugs and laughing at everything she says? Maybe she’ll put me in a headlock and we’ll take a picture? Sky is the limit.
If I can drag someone to go with me I just may have all my dreams come true. Oh, and by “my dreams” I really mean “Kelly’s nightmares.”
I mean it’s like she won’t ever invite me to anything! Blessed Mother Kelly Cutrone made a public appearance and showed up all smiles to the “Objects of Life” opening at the Robert Miller Gallery in New York City last night. Braving the frigid temperatures and howling winds, my little Kiki Cutrone sported her black hood and multi-layered black clothing to keep warm. Soon thereafter we got a little smile from the Kikinator 3000. Other celebrities in attendance were Jessica Lange, Michael Stipe, Calvin Klein, Patti Smith, and Not Me. So, well, thanks for the invite.
As popular as Kelly is from her kick-arse career and her time spent as the boss from the heavens on The Hills and The City, Kiko is going to blow up even more when her new reality show, Kell on Earth, begins airing on Bravo on Feb 1st. That’s someone else who won’t hire me. Bravo. Geesh. I mean Oprah tells me to dream big, but I’m having a hard time believing her!
Gather around your nap mats, boys and girls (and those with both a pee-pee and a wee-wee) because it is story time with IBBB. Let us mix my favorite things: Golden Books and Kelly Cutrone. Enjoy and rest your eyes if you’d like. I’ll wake you when it’s over.
Ok, eyes open everyone. Now get back to work.