More Mindless Stories on ‘jonas brothers’
Posted by IBBB
Fonzie would be beaming with pride right now at the Jonas Brothers. So, quick story. I made the mistake of running over to Starbucks yesterday to grab a coffee here in NYC at the absolute worst time ever. Apparently the Jonas Brothers (who I guess are a real live band and not a cartoon like I originally thought) were on TRL and there had to be a million screaming little girls in front of the Starbucks I was at waiting for the Joans Brothers to come out from the TRL side entrance. After elbowing about 1500 little girls with glittery posters and paint on their faces (I don’t care, they need to learn the lessons of the streets at a young age) I finally made it to get my shitty coffee. On the way back I actually saw these 3 douches posing for this picture while all you heard were people screaming. Apparently doing your best Fonzie impression all whilst wearing random ties is all you need to get some fans.
Seriously, looking around at all these little girls all I could think was how brainwashed they were. It’s like all the marketing tactics really work on these little girls. Geesh. I tried yelling out to them, “Go home and hit the books so that we’re not always behind the God damn Chinese when it comes to math” but no one could hear me as a Jonas Brothers chant began.
IBBB note to self: Wear bow ties and give people the thumbs up.
I never really feel that old. I usually pride myself on being pretty knowledgeable on all current events and by “current events” I really mean “stupid pop culture crap.” However I can honestly say I know nothing about The Jonas Brothers. Nothing. When researching things to post about on good old IBBB I always come across Jonas Brothers stuff, but never read it. From what I can gather, they are singers? Are they from England? I think they are. And how is Miley Cyrus involved with them? And, more importantly, who is Selma Gomez? And who is Demi Lovato? And why are these three names always associated with The Jonas Brothers? Are they all virgins? Is that the deal? Are they all the same person? Is it like the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montanna thing? Am I old?
I’m totally and utterly confused. Therefore I am reaching out to you, the IBBB readers, to explain to me exactly what The Jonas Brothers are. I feel that knowing this will “help me get in good with the ‘the kids.’” While you’re at it, tell me everything you know about Demi and Selma. I think I’m pretty up-to-speed on Miley. Her southern cackalacky twang and deep hick voice tells me all I need to know.