So Who Exactly Shows Up to a Jodie Sweetin Book Signing, You Ask? I know! I Know!

jodie-sweetin-book-signing-1

 

jodie-sweetin-book-signing-2

jodie-sweetin-book-3

It’s times like this that I’m glad the world hasn’t ended yet.  I’ve always wondered who showed up to a Jodie Sweetin book signing.  Now had I been in LA I would have, for sure, showed up and just started yelling out Full House references like I was a pervert with turrets.  However, I know I can’t be the only crazy who would be there and, well, I wasn’t wrong.  Check out the dude in the green t-shirt sitting Right. Up. Front.  In case you can’t read his t-shirt it says, and I quote, “Life is To Short to Hunt With an Ugly Gun.”  And you totally know he was sitting there with his hands down his pants and foaming from the mouth.  Now I can’t prove this for sure, but I’m almost certain the man in the left of the picture with the white (gag) ponytail (puke) that looks like it itches and smells like the ring-around-the-tub that Lindsay Lohan leaves is probably Papouli in disguise.  I know that son-of-a-bi*ch wasn’t dead.  I knew it!

Anyway, I hope to one day interview Jodie Sweetin for this here blog so, well, someone make that happen or never come around these parts again, ya hear!  In the meantime, check out some other photos of Sweetits from her book signing of UnSweetined at Barnes and Noble in LA the other day.

jodie-sweetin-book-4   jodie-sweetin-book-5   jodie-sweetin-book-signing-1   jodie-sweetin-book-signing-2

Follow Me on Facebook!  It’s All the Rage.

Getting To Know You: Jodie Sweetin Edition

stephanie-tanner-bee-outfit-costume

Time for another installment of Getting to Know YOU! Here we take a look at what words people are typing into Google and somehow landing on ImBringingBloggingBack. With the upcoming release of her new book, “unSweetined,” people arriving to IBBB with Jodie Sweetin or Stephanie Tanner references is at an all time high.  Brilliant. As always, I list out my favorites of the past week and add my own thoughts after. Enjoy it, but not too much.

  • jodie sweetin cameltoe (how rude! but if someone has the pics, please send)
  • was jodie sweetin on juvies? (i wish. maybe if there’s a relapse.  we’ll hold out hope)
  • when does jodie sweetin’s book come out (none of your business)
  • is mr bear in jodie sweetin’s book (oh god if he is I hope it’s like a lifesize pop-up book!)
  • jodie sweetin snorting meth on the today show with the olsen twins (i mean, who in their right mind thinks this actually happened?!)
  • buy jodie sweetin’s meth pipe (i smell a bewing business deal!)
  • jodie sweetin and kimmy gibbler doing drugs (leave kimmy out of this!)
  • how rude sweetin is a meth face (punctuation? any punctuation? no? fine.)
  • stephanie tanner walks in on uncle jesse and ant becky doing their taxes (rookie question. it was michelle tanner of course.)
  • what is jodie sweetin up to now besides drugs (she’s clean and sober, so watch your mouth or i’ll wash it out with cheap meth!)
  • does anyone know if jodie sweetin bought fake boobs? (guilty)

Jodie Sweetin's Book, "unSweetined," Will Be My New Bible

unsweetined

Praise Jesus Claus, Santa Christ, and the Holy Mr. Bear!  Jodie Sweetin has a new book coming out titled, “unSweetined,” which is a memoir of her life.  Now personally I would have called it either of the following: “How Rude: How Mr. Bear Got Me Hooked on Wine and Meth” or something catchier like, “I Never Got Over the Death of Papouli: The Jodie Sweetin Diaries.”

Moving on.  According to our friends (who don’t know us) at People Magazine, we can learn a lot about the demons that Jodie fought after Full House wrapped after 8 mind-numbing seasons.  For example:

  • Jodie got so drunk at Candace Cameron’s wedding that she puked and was carried out:  Oh shiz! Wait until Danny finds out about this!  Stephanie and DJ are going to have to come up with a song better than “Dad, Dad, Dad…He’s So Rad, He’s Our Dad” to get out of this.  Also, Jodie doesn’t confirm if by Candace’s wedding she meant the wedding to that hockey player or Uncle Jesse’s Greek nephew.  Eh, scratch that.  I’m pretty sure they got divorced by walking backwards around the kitchen table.
  • Jodie did ecstacy in high school and cocaine in college: More shocking that Jodie went to college? 
  • At the Olsen Twins premiere of their movie, “In a New York Minute,” Jodie was “high as a kite” on the red carpet and snorted meth in a bathroom stall.  Jodie brags, “I look at photos from that event and I didn’t even look strung out!” :  Impressive.  I wonder if Jodie was a little more strung out than she thought because I think she confused the “red carpet” from “In a New York Minute” with her “living room couch” whilst watching the direct-to-video of the Olsen Twins singing “I’m the Cute One.”
  • Jodie was adopted when she was 9-months old and her real mom abused drugs and her dad was killed in a prison riot:  Um, her dad was Danny Tanner and her mom died shortly after Michelle was born.  Drugs much?

I’m hoping Jodie’s book also is available in the audio version because I’d like to listen to it on repeat whilst I sleep.  Also, if Jodie is asking for my advice, and I think she is, she’s going to need a huge bomb to really sell the piss out of this book, similar to the way Mackenzie Phillips did. Oh, I don’t know…off the top of my head…uh….em…er….uh….ok, perhaps she had a consentual sexual relationship with both Papouli and Mr Woodchuck?  Did somebody say…..wooood?  Or maybe she used the one Olsen who wasn’t filming scenes that day, as a drug-mule?  Maybe she gave sexual pleasure to Comet?  Maybe she had a three-way with Kimmy Gibbler and DJ’s Spanish teacher that kissed Danny?  Sky is the limit, Sweetin, sky is the limit!

I would like to interview Jodie for this blog. Just putting it out there.

“unSweetined” comes out on November 3rd. Buy it, read it, buy it again.  Buy it for all of your Christmas gifts.  Buy it, read it, record you reading it, put it on iTunes, have Kandi from Real Housewives of Atlanta remix it, and then buy that song version of the book. 

unsweetined

Who Will Get Custody of Mr. Bear?

Oh Sweetin. Oh my little Sweetin. My little Sweetin, poor Sweetin, I’d love to brush that meth out of your hair.

Jodie Sweetin is totally trying to ruin my dream of her getting her own reality show and/or taking part in a future Full House reunion. Poor Stephanie Tanner is not allowed to see her 8-month old daughter without the supervision of one of her parents (Danny Tanner?). This is all thanks to her husband, Cody Herpes, who told a judge that Steponme Tanner is an unfit mother and even drove drunk one time with her daughter in the car. Is that a big deal? Haven’t we all been in the car with our drunk parents before? How else were we supposed to get to school?

I just hope that Mr Bear is never in harms way.

Well pin a rose on your nose. How rude! Have mercy! Cut it out! You got it dude! Well blow me down arg arg arg arg arg! Whoa baby! Hola Tanneritos!

Source It Up!

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

The Jodie Sweetin Divorce = IBBB’s Opportunity

After receiving an alarming number of emails from readers and phone calls from friends, IBBB has be alerted that Stephanie Tanner has officially split from her husband. According to a close friend, Mr. Bear is a two-timing bastard.

Jodie StepOnMe Tanner Sweetin has filed papers late last week in Orange Country, CA for legal separation from her husband of 16-months.

Seriously, this better not put a wrench in the reality show plans or I’m going to be really pissed. Perhaps this is just part of the reality-show storyline. Either way, I’m in the process of packing up my bags and heading out to LA to finally get my chance at (1) Sweetin (2) Be Part of the Reality Show (3) Kidnap Mr. Bear (4) Try to orchestrate a Full House reunion (5) Rub all of this in Kimmy Gibbler’s face.

If Stephanie Judith Tanner Chung ends up getting an actual divorce hopefully she’ll follow in the same footsteps of her chunky sister, DJ, and get divorced by walking backwards around the kitchen table. If it works for Greek weddings it should work for Jodie.

What a terrible time. Someone dig up Papouli and see if he can fix this crap. How rude!

Source It Up!

The Jodie Sweetin Book. IBBB’s Dream Come to Life.


Looks like StepOnMe Tanner is no longer the awkward duckling, as today she as transformed into an awkward swan. Magic. Jodie Sweetin, apparently sporting red car paint on her lips, was looking slim and trim on the red carpet of the 15th Annual Lint Roller Party (Best Friends Animal Society) in Hollywood, California. Surprising not her arm was Mr. Bear. I’ve put out an ABP on Mr. Bear and hope he returns safe and sound.

Us Weekly took a breath from blowing the cast of The Hills and decided to speak with Stephanie Tanner about what was going on in her life. Besides the possibility of a reality show (pray to Jesus Claus this happens) and her daughter who is starting to babble and has 4 teeth (who cares), Jodie has a book coming out some time in 2009! Sweet(in)! Oh crap, they should call it that!

How did Jodie lose all the baby weight you ask? NutriSystem and daily TV workouts. My guess? Back to meth. Ok, low blow. Oh, maybe blow?

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

Source It Up!

Someone Take a Brush to Sweetin



Jodie Sweetin, her rack, and her baby were all strange facial expressions and awkward poses whilst on the brown carpet at the “Celebration of Babies Benefiting the March of Dimes” at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills over the weekend.

You’d figure if Stephanie Tanner knew she was going to be photographed she would have brushed that rats nest of a hairdo. Although her rack was looking quite perky. It really balances out her chin. Wait a second. When you think about it, Jodie Sweetin is totally the original Heidi Montag. So this is basically what Heidi Montag would look like fast-forward 8 years if she never had any work done. Suddenly Heidi doesn’t seem so crazy anymore. Chins and racks. It’s the way of the future!

I can’t wait for Jodie’s reality show to get picked up. I don’t care if a network picks it up or not. Jodie, you can post Youtube clips right here on IBBB and I’ll still recap it. It’s going to be a great fall! I know, I know, I sound like a geek-burger with cheese. How rude!

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

Jodie Sweetin’s Reality Show: Jesus Claus Has Answered My Prayers!

Dust off the meth on Mr Bear because Jodie Sweetin and her husband, Cody, are in the process of filming their very own reality show. I’ve prayed to both Jesus Claus and Santa Christ that this reality show would, in fact, happen and it looks like we are so close to seeing it. The only minor problem is that a network hasn’t picked it up yet. Network schmetwork. Put it on YouTube and I’ll still recap the ever loving piss out of it.

According to Stephanie Tanner the show will follow Jodie, her husband, and their new baby. Sounds riveting. However, then Jodie really put the nail in the coffin when she said that her new show was kind of like “Tori and Dean” but with a little more rock and roll. Ugh. More rock and roll than Tori and Dean? Doubtful. Perhaps Jodie hasn’t seen Tori and Dean’s music video?

While Jodie is in talks with “many” networks, she did namedrop VH1 as one of them. Please just don’t let it be the Hallmark Channel. I made a personal vow to myself to never turn it on.

Hopefully this show will also show Stephanie Judith Tanner dressing up, again, as Connie Chung and dropping the “how rude” bomb every 4 minutes. Also, any way to incorporate Mr Bear, Gia, Gia’s makeout party, and possibly “The Jess Man” into the show will surely win it an Emmy next year. I. Can’t. Wait. To. Recap. This. Show. I am a complete loser and I love it.

So Who Shows Up to a “Bob Saget Roast?”





Everyone and their mother was at the Bob Saget Comedy Central Roast the other day. As a wise man once said “When you’re lost out there and you’re all alone, when life is waiting to carry you home. Everywhere you look.” I’m not fully sure what that means, but the words were part of the Full House theme song and Full House is my new religion so I believe whatever it says.

While random celebrities like Judy Tenuta, Alan Thicke, Cloris Leachman, Jodie Sweetin and many of the other Full House cast members made it to the roast, the Olsen Sluts were missing (as I reported yesterday). Well, the Olsen Skanks should count themselves lucky for missing the event because E Online is reporting that the Olsen’s were the butt of many of the jokes, including jokes about Bob Saget having sexual encounters with them while they were underage. Yeah, because that’s always funny. You totally know that Danny Tanner would make Michelle stick her thumb up his bum while she said, “You Got it Dude!” and gave the “thumbs up” sign. Pervert.

You can check out the roast on August 17th on Comedy Central. I’ll be watching because, to me, it will be like a Full House reunion and I can’t wait to see Uncle Joey completely bomb. You know he’s still using those “cut, it, out” jokes and probably still has that retarded woodchuck puppet with him. Did somebody say……wood? No Joey, they didn’t. Rot in hell.

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack

I’m Totally Watching This and Recapping the Ever-Loving Crap Out of It!

It’s Full House Monday here at IBBB! This may be old news, but guess what? I don’t give a Gibbler. I’m totally running with this story today. Brace yourself everyone. Jodie Sweetin is in talks to get her own….wait for it…wait for it…..reality show! Praise Santa!

Jodie was at the Maxim Extreme Sports party in LA the other day and told reporters that “We’re going to start shooting in a couple of months. We are in talks with a couple of networks right now. We have one picked out, but nothing is signed yet.”

Oh God. I can only imagine what network this is going to be. Why do I feel like it’s going to be like God-forsaken “Oxygen” network or like The Hallmark channel. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m already in progress of programming my TIVO. I know my TIVO is going to try to fight me on this too. I’ll program it and my TIVO will totally try to delete it.

Oh, and here’s the best part. When asked why they were going to do the show, Jodie said, “I think it’s sort of a fun way to show the other side of celebrity and a semi-normal life.”

Oh really? That’s cool. So, uh….er….um….er….what celebrities will they be showing on Jodie’s reality show? I. Can’t. Wait. For. This.

Source It Up!

www.myspace.com/ImBringingBloggingBack