You know how they say sometimes that “less than attractive” parents have beautiful children? I don’t know, I’ve heard that before. Well, do you think that really attractive parents will have ugly children? Personally, I think that’s the price they should be forced to pay (by law) for being so damn good looking. We’ll see what happens with baby Nahla. We’ll be watching you Nahla. We look forward to your awkward stage when you’re 15 yrs old and I’m 150 and still blogging. We’ll see who’s laughing then (it’ll be you, trust me).

Halle Berry, her boyfriend/possible fiance Gabriel Aubry, and their daughter out of wedlock (you know the official term), Nahla, were doing a little shopping whilst in NYC the other day. Doesn’t look like they’re shopping to me, but I guess I’m just splitting hairs…..whatever that means.

Halle Berry clearly dropped all of her baby weight, stuffed her rack-attack into an Obama t-shirt and hauled her ass out for a little shopping in Century City yesterday. Whatever Halle’s boobs tells me to do I’m totally doing. Get caught robbing a store? Simply answer “Halle’s boobs made me do it” and the police will quickly let you go with a soft pat on the back. Clearly Halle is voting for Obama. No word yet on who her cameltoe will be voting for. Perhaps a write-in.

In bitchy Halle Berry news, Halle has filed a complaint against the paparazzo who took pictures of Halle and her baby in the privacy of her own home. And investigation is now underway. Can’t this paparzzo just say that Halle’s boobs made him do it? I’d go with that defense.

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Me gusta Halle Berry. I do me gusta. Halle Berry was shopping in Malibu the other day and being courteous enough to stop and sign some autographs, which got me to thinking. Why do people want autographs? Besides the people that sell them for profit, the idea of autographs is baffling to me. Is that lady going to go home and tell her friends, “Look at this napkin. See those scribbles? That’s Halle Berry’s name. She spelled it all by herself!” Who cares really? First it’s autographs and the next thing you know this lady is in the bathroom stall next to Halle and asking her for her crap-stained toilet paper. Frame that shit and hang it in your game room. Just a thought.

Halle Berry was at the Revlon Walk/Run for Women in LA over the weekend doing good deeds, but that is all shadowed by these shots of Halle sporting a little pre-camel celebrity cameltoe. She is so close, yet so far away but I know that Halle is a strong woman and can do anything she puts her mind to. I mean, she won the Oscar so she can most certainly train a little bit harder to really show outstanding cameltoe action. We can barely play my favorite IBBB game, “ImBringingBloggingBack Celebrity Cameltoe Rating System…to the Stars!” but I will still award Halle 1 camel out of a possible 5 because she’s showing promise and determination and she’s sending out a great message that all women can experience the cameltoe no matter what your age, race, or economic situation. Hats off to Halle!

Don’t you wanna dance, say you wanna dance, don’t you wanna dance. And I’ll officially kill myself now. Halle Berry was out and about on Robertson Boulevard the other day buying some expensive crap for her unborn bastard child. Halle is rocking her brand new home perm inspired by, always entertaining, Whitney Houston. I say, if that perm was inspired by Whitney Houston where are the receipts? Show me the receipts of that perm. Thank you, Diane.

Anyway, I realized that I hadn’t written about Halle Berry in a while but when you mix some of my favorite things; unwed knocked up mothers, home perms, old Whitney Houston jokes, and a keyboard you really have no choice. Good luck with the baby Halle, I’m sure that your “gentleman greeter” must be looking a little bit more like your new perm each and every day. Cheers.