More Mindless Stories on ‘gossip girl’
Jun
19
19
Gossip Girl Gets Pissed On
Finally, something interesting to write about Gossip Girl’s Blake Lively. After just writing yesterday how boring she was, we now get to insert a few golden shower jokes and even a doggy style joke just for good measure. Again, it’s like Santa is answering all of my prayers and “yes” I pray to Santa.
Boring Blake Lively was boringly out minding her own boring business and taking her boring dog for a boring walk on a boring street in New York with some boring dude when the boring dog up and pissed all over her boring tan dress. The paparazzi were there to capture every last second of her golden shower and Blake just stared boringly into the camera. She then covered up her boring dress with a boring bag, just like Claire Huxtable used to do when she was pregnant on the Cosby Show and nobody was supposed to know. Hell, I might as well toss in a “pregnancy rumor” about Blake. Is Blake Lively blocking her boring baby bump?
May
27
27
Chase Crawford, Urine Laced Hair?
Hey ladies, ever wonder how your favorite Chase Crawford gets his hair so stylish, stylish and highlighted just right? Well the secret may be in the urine and the feces. However, before you ask your husband to take a dump on your head (again) you may want listen to this story first, Dirty Sanchez.
So, in the same night that me and my friends ran into Brody Jenner at STK in NYC on Friday night we also saw Chase Crawford come into the restaurant as well. He rolled in around 8pm, which was kind of early since we were all making fun ourselves for having the early bird special. Anyway, he was surrounded by a ton of girls and a few dudes to which we will later see him eating dinner with just at the bottom of the stairs that take you up to the bathroom. What’s odd is that upstairs there are a few private rooms, so good for him for sitting with the rest of us second class citizens.
Anyway, my buddy Mike and I head up to the bathroom to which we are talking out loud about a plan to get into a brawl with Brody Jenner and get ourselves on the cover of Us Weekly. Let me tell ya, after a ton of vodka and wine it really sounded like a brilliant plan. When we were putting this plan together we were alone in the bathroom with the exception of the bathroom attendant (who was laughing with/at us and our plan)…..and Chase Crawford who comes out of the side bathroom stall while we are washing our hands. He legit stands in front of the mirror for a good 10 seconds and keeps playing with this hair and rubbing his hands down the sides of his hair…..and he turns around to leave….without tipping the bathroom attendant….OR washing his hands. I followed him down the stairs hoping that I would have the chance to ask him if he was doing number 1 or number 2, but no luck. I’d assume # 2 b/c what dude goes in the stall for # 1…..unless you’re Lindsay Lohan and getting your fix of coke. Just pondering. Look if you’re not going to wash your hands, that’s your deal but if you’re famous and you know 2 drunken retards are not only looking at you, but are also crafting a plan on a way to get into Us Weekly, don’t you think you’d at least rinse one hand under the faucet?
As a side note, there’s a little thing call bathroom etiquette. Sure you don’t talk to someone while they’re going to the bathroom, but if you’re both at the sink area a simple head nod is customary….as is not rubbing piss in your hair. Maybe I’m just old-fashioned. I love living in New York. I’m hot on your trail next, Olsen Twins!
Apr
21
21
Gossip Girl is Still On?
Posted by IBBB
gossip girl 
So, er, uh Gossip Girl is still on huh? I never made it past the pilot episode. I was literally forced to watch it once and was kicking and screaming like a tweaked out homeless person being dragged out of the nacho aisle of a 7-11 on the 4th of July. It’s terrible, no? Who wants to watch some anonymous blogger talk about stupid crap each week? Bloggers are losers. Oh wait. Yeah, I am. Anyway, here’s the whole gang on the cover of New York Magazine that is very reminiscent of the way that Friends used to do their covers, along with the same way the crack-pot cast of 90210 used to do theirs and Melrose Place used to do theirs. Basically, the put everyone in white and then make them take their socks off and lay down on a white bed sheet. I’ve actually made it a rule to not watch a show that has the cast do something like this…and I think I’ve been dead on every day.
So I guess Gossip Girls premieres tonight. Do shows usually start their season at the end of April? Does anyone watch this show? If so, please explain.
