More Mindless Stories on ‘dina lohan’
Well isn’t this like looking into an opposites crystal ball! Blessed Mother Dina Lohan was all sass and no frass while heading into court yesterday to face Father Michael Lohan and try to get her some of that child support money because, you know, Linds aint payin’ da billz, yo! Dinasaur Lohan is claiming that she hasn’t received child support in over one year, which is odd because I assumed that Michael Lohan’s annual bonus would cover that. No? Doesn’t have a job? Oh. Cashing in his 401K? No? Doesn’t have one? Oh. Savings account? Zip? Yowza. Selling his collection of Garbage Pail Kids? Already sold them? Oh. Oh well. Well Dinasaur can’t make ends meet with her dancing tips or extensions sales and, well, the littlest ginger Lohan may need braces so cough it up Michael!
I hope Dina doesn’t end up like Anna Nicole. You know, dead. Just wanted to make sure we were all on the same page with that. Screw you, Rusty!
Dina Lohan is Like a Broken Record. A Blond Broken Record. A Blond Broken Record Who Dresses Like a Teenager With Fake Hair.
Alright. I love me some Dinasaur Lohan. Clearly. But is there any chance she can stop saying the same crap over and over (and over) again about why she did her reality show? The Dinasaur and Ali (who is obviously pushing retirement age) were on the CBS Early Show, which apparently is still on the air, to defend their reality show “Living Lohan.” Here’s what Dinasaur had to say (please read this with a deep, deep voice):
“The only reason why I did the show originally was to diffuse the rumors. The press for two years was really horrific on us. Ali is a talented artist. I have two sons as well who have nothing to do with the business. I think at that point, you know, there’s such a weird perception of Hollywood families and we’re so not like that. We’re just normal people.”
Good thinking, Dinasaur! Nothing gets you away from the press and the spotlight quite like being in a reality show and then going on a press tour. Brilliant!
Ali, on the other hand, stated that she wanted to do the show in order to prove to people that at 14 years old she did not have a nose job. No really. She said that. Is getting a show that easy these days because if it is I’m all in. I’m heading over to E! and pitching a reality show on this basis: “I want a show to prove to everyone that I do other things than blog.” I’m just kidding. I don’t do other things.
While the Bravo A-List Awards dragged on last night I began to wonder why I was still there. Then I hear the announcer say, “Ladies and gentlemen, Dina and Ali Lohan!” I perk up and psyched and actually say the words out loud, “I F’n love Dina.” There I said it. I said it. I own it. I’m fine with it. Then Kathy Griffin comes out shaking her head. No Dina? Nope. Kathy told us that the class act that is Dina Lohan called at 3:00 to cancel her appearance. The red carpet started at like 5 and the show started taping around 7:00. I was so disappointed there was no Dina and Ali, but then Kathy decided that since they weren’t there she was going to talk smack about them….and then did for about 5 minutes. It was great. They even placed placement card of Dina and Ali on chairs up in the front since they weren’t there.