More Mindless Stories on ‘"boy's father"’
Apr
16
16
"Boy’s Father" on 16th Minute of Fame
Just when you think there is no more for “Boy’s Father” to say, “Boy’s Father” says more. Here at the award winning IBBB, we’ve been following “Boy’s Father” since he first started talking to the press after Madonna adopted his son in Malawi. Now, “Boy’s Father” is at it again claiming that he has not heard from Madonna and does not know if she currently is in Malawi to adopt another child. Here’s what “Boy’s Father” had to say, “Officially I have not heard anything. There has been no communication whatsoever but I have heard the rumors and I get the feeling that she might be coming. I am excited. I hope that there will be an opportunity for me to see my son.”
Yeah, that sounds credible. He hasn’t heard anything, but has a “feeling” she might be coming. Why not just whip out the Ouija Board and see what that has to say?
“Boy’s Father” is also a little pissed that he hasn’t heard from Madonna on how is son is doing. While he has no regrets about the adoption he claims he is disappointed that Madonna has not kept in touch even after he asked for her address and phone number so that he could contact her.
Uh, yeah. Not so much. I, personally, am shocked that Madonna would not give out her phone number and address to “Boy’s Father.” I mean he seems completely normal. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Stop asking how your son is doing. I can tell you how he’s doing. He’s fine. He’s better than fine. He’s great! He’s rich, and not hungry anymore, and has 15 butlers, and his own personal train that he can ride around the mansion. Oh, and he’s starting to develop his own “fake British accent” too just like his new mom. He probably doesn’t miss Malawi where you live. Sorry, he just doesn’t. You live in a mud hut and wear tissue boxes for shoes. He lives in a mansion and wears actual alligators as shoes. Madonna trumped you, “Boy’s Father.” Madonna trumped you. Good day.
Apr
03
03
"Boy’s Mother" Gives "Boy’s Father" a Run For His Money
There is nothing that made me crazier than having to read stories about “Boy’s Father.” If you recall, “Boy’s Father” was the father of the boy (go figure) that Madonna adopted. It seems like every other week “Boy’s Father” was coming out of the woodwork to give an interview. Well, move over “Boy’s Father” because now there is “Boy’s Mother.”
The mother of Angelina Jolie’s (bless yourself) adopted son, Pax, is now coming forward to get her 15 minutes of fame. “Boy’s Mother” was a tragic heroin addict who left her newborn at a Vietnamese hospital when he was just two days old. Some say “tragedy,” I say “jackpot.” I’m sure this little kid is psyched he’s no longer living in poverty and wearing tissue boxes for shoes and now has Angelina Jolie has a mom and is crazy rich.
“Boy’s Mother” (Pham Thu Dung – exactly) has told reporters that she never signed the adoption papers, but will not try to get her son back. “Boy’s Mother” will also not try to get money from Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt even though she is poor. “Boy’s Mother” would like to tell her son “sorry” that she had to give him away.
Yeah, nice try “lady.” You may say you don’t want money now, but just wait when you see the house that you kid lives in. You’ll pull a “Boy’s Father” before you know it and will be hitchhiking to LA to visit your new friends “Angelina” and “Brad.” Oh, and as a side note “Boy’s Mother” is a heroin addict. That’s sweet. She should try selling drugs to kids in order to get out of poverty. I heard that works.
Mar
08
08
Oh Jesus! "Boy’s Father" Wants to See Madonna’s New Son David. He’s Baaaaack!
Ok so next to Harriet Carter and Dina Lohan my other favorite person is “Boy’s Father.” In case you’re new to this site, “Boy’s Father” is Banda who is the father of Madonna’s adopted son, David. I guess they technically call that “biological father.” See how much you can learn here at IBBB? Anyway, every article I ever read about Banda always refers to him as “boy’s father” so that’s what I only call him. Moving on.
Boy’s Father is hoping that Madonna brings David and let’s him see his son when she visits Malawi in April. Madonna and Guy Ritchie are planning on swinging by Malawi to open up with $2.92 million Kabbalah Center. Suck on that Oprah!
Boy’s Father has stated, “I can’t wait to hold him in my arms again. I want to see if he still recognizes me after all this time. I want to see if he still looks like me with all the British food he is eating.”
Wait what? Um, Boy’s Father, yeah eating British food won’t change the color of his skin. I totally think he will recognize you, but he’ll probably look/run the other way. I mean right now he has probably around 15 maids, 10 butlers, his own personal train that he can drive around the mansion, and enough LEGO’s to play with that he could build an actual livable house that I could move into. You, Boy’s Father, live in a mud hut and wear tissue boxes for shoes. I wonder who he’ll choose? So, here’s my advice: Become wicked good friends with Madonna while they are there and see if you can move into the mansion with them. Ask to become like the gardener or something. Hell, even the accountant!
Jan
03
03
"Boy’s Father" Still a Pain in the Ass
Seriously dude, let’s give it a rest. The father of the Malawain boy that Madonna is adopting, whom I just call “boy’s father” (Click Here for More on “Boy’s Father”) is out in the spotlight again asking up tons of questions to Madonna.
Basically, Boy’s Father wants to see how is son is doing with Madonna, but doesn’t have her phone number, mailing address, or any other means to get in touch with her. Oh, and as a side note, Boy’s Father made this statement after the Malawai Daily Times newspaper paid him $788 for his comments. I would have told them “no deal.” Actually, who am I kidding? I totally would have taken the physical challenge or better yet I would have gone with Whoopi for the block. There were endless options.
Boy’s Father is hoping that through this press Madonna will respond to his question. I don’t think he really needs Madonna to answer. I can answer for her:
Dear Boy’s Father,
Dude, your son is doing fine. Actually, he’s doing better than fine. He’s also doing better than more than 96% of all Americans. He’s living like a king. He has like 16 maids, 10 chefs, and like $1 billion to play with when his own personal sized fully working toy train gets boring. Oh, and he is really liking not living in a tent…I would assume. But I mean, life is kinda tough for him too. He’s going to have to compete with other celebrity kids soon such as “The Shiloh” and “The Suri.” Oh, and his accent is going to be all jacked up because he’s from Malawai and currently lives in London where he will be surrounded by British people and his mom who has some type of an American-British accent. Other than those two things, he is doing kick-ass. So, if you really want to find out how he’s doing just shoot me an email and I can set you straight. If you want to talk with Madonna directly just set up a Myspace account. She must be on there right? In the meantime, take care Boy’s Father.
Luke-Warm Regards,
Pasquale
Oct
27
27
Boy’s Father a Pain in the Ass
Seriously, every time I turn around there is some new story about the “boy’s father” in reference to the boy that Madonna is trying to adopt. Every two seconds the “boy’s father” is making a statement about the adoption. He’s afraid, he was confused, he didn’t know who Madonna was, he thought she was just borrowing him, he doesn’t want her to adopt him, he does want her to adopt him, he’s in the mood for Taco Bell. I mean, this guy is relentless.
Now “boy’s father”, Yohane Banda, is “afraid that Madonna may get angry and frustrated and decided to dump my son because of these people (the Human Rights activists).”
He also said one of the nicest things you can say as a father. “Boy’s father” stated, “I’m afraid David may be sent back and the orphanage may not even accept him. So where will he end up? Here?” Ohhh, that is so sweet. Dude, why would the first place this kid goes if he gets rejected by Madonna an orphanage? Why wouldn’t he just go back with “boy’s father?”
Now “boy’s father”, Yohane Banda, is “afraid that Madonna may get angry and frustrated and decided to dump my son because of these people (the Human Rights activists).”
He also said one of the nicest things you can say as a father. “Boy’s father” stated, “I’m afraid David may be sent back and the orphanage may not even accept him. So where will he end up? Here?” Ohhh, that is so sweet. Dude, why would the first place this kid goes if he gets rejected by Madonna an orphanage? Why wouldn’t he just go back with “boy’s father?”
So, here are my thoughts. Madonna sends for “boy’s father” and has “boy’s father” live with them in London. Perhaps he’ll be their butler or assistant or something. Madonna can quickly teach him a horrible fake British accent and then they can immediately make this into a reality show that will be broadcast on the BBC and titled, “Madonna, Boy’s Father, and Me!” It will open to rave reviews. “Boy’s father” will sign endorsements with Sketchers, Axe Body Spray, and Swiffer. All will appear on American Idol as guest judges and then “boy” and “boy’s father” can head back to their village and run for mayor. It’s really a win-win.
