Amy Fisher Doesn’t Care Mary Jo Has Permanent “Side Mouth.” Even More Shocking, Amy is a Millionaire.

It’s great when an attempted murderer does some jail time, fast forwards about 15 years, and then still shows no remorse for her doings. High class Amy Fisher says she feels “no sympathy” for Mary Jo Buttafuoco. Wow. Even though it looks like Mary Jo is always on the verge of saying, “pork-chops and applesauce?” Wow.
Amy articulately stated, “Mary Jo is a nonentity. People are angry at me because I’m a millionaire. But guess what? So is Mary Jo! She made more millions off of what I did than what I made.”

Yeah, I’m pretty sure that people aren’t mad at you because you’re a millionaire. I believe, I believe, they are a little cross at you because you’re a crazy whore who shot your boyfriends wife in the lip. No? I may be confused. I think that’s what they showed in all those “Long Island Lolita” movie-of-the-weeks.

Amy continued on her apparent apology victory tour by saying, “I feel no sympathy for Mary Jo the multimillionaire! The fact that Mary Jo has a bullet in her head means nothing! I still have silicone in my boobs, and you don’t hear me complaining. She can’t feel her bullet, and I can’t feel my silicone.”

Yes, a bullet in the lip and silicone in the breast is technically the same thing. Do you know how many people also lost their lives due to silicone in the breast. I can’t wait to contact Amy via Ouija Board and ask her what hell is like.

Who Said That!?

Joey Buttafuoco and Amy Fisher Doing Reality Show. Finally, TV Worth Watching!

Joey Buttafuoco has completed his jail time for weapons charges and is rumored to be filming a “romantic” reality show with Amy Fisher. Awww that is sweet. They can be like, “Hey remember that time when I was cheating on my wife and then you shot her in the face? Yeah, the was sooo romantic of you.”

Supposedly, these two wild and crazy kids will be filmed in Central Park at a romantic restaurant so that Amy and Joey can enjoy a candlelight dinner. When the New York Post asked Joey what he thought about this reunion he stated: “I still have feelings for her. I can’t wait to have dinner with her. I can’t wait to be with her. I can’t wait to touch her.”

Uhhh ok Joey, keep it in your pants please. There will be cameras rolling and no one needs to see that mess. You know what’s great about all this? This really increases the chances that Mary Jo will be making the interview rounds and I can’t wait. Mary Jo is my favorite and I’ve been really trying to perfect my Mary Jo impression lately, but haven’t had any new material to watch. At least this will make all my Mary Jo jokes (that I’ve still been doing since 1994) relevant.