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Jan
29

Teen Mom 2 Recap: Engaged and Pregnant in Any Given Order

Posted by IBBB
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So I’m back after my recent travels and time off.  I may have missed part of the episode last week, but it appears that none of these girls gave their toddlers up for adoption yet so, well, we’re still in business.  Let’s see what Braces, Chin, Bricks, and Roots are up to this week!

Leah - Hey y’all it’s time to drop my kids off in the middle of a parking lot to their daddy because boyfriend and I are heading to a cabin in the woods so we can most likely have unprotected sex and/or get our throats slashed by a man with a knife who lives in the forest, y’all!”  Phew that was a mouthful (that’s what she said).  I’m surprised with all the “swapping of kids” in unmarked vehicles that take place in the parking lot, cops aren’t there thinking that Leah is selling twins on the black market.  I’m sure “the twins” are hoping they’re getting sold to someone without so many long extensions that are most likely getting dunked in the toilet every time Leah goes #1 or #2, y’all!  And don’t even get me going on #3 (time of the month).  Ole!  After the drop off, Leah and Jeremy head into the woods to they can basically film porn with an MTV camera crew (backup plan).  They tour the house and since Jeremy has about two more grades completed than Corey he opens the bedroom door, sees the bed, and says, “I bet this is where we’ll sleep.”  Well, Jeremy, you just shout ‘em out when you know ‘em!  Next thing you know Leah is going to unpack so they can later go into the hot tub.  Mmm clean.  I guess that’s the best way to prevent pregnancy.  I have no idea.  Anyway, once Leah leaves the room Jeremy takes out a ring from his duffel bag and hides it in a vase on the fireplace like it’s Mr Brady’s plans.  The only thing that would make this more exiting for me is if a cartoon bear entered the cabin, put his paw in the vase, and then proposed to the tin trash barrel in the kitchen.

Well we don’t have to wait to long because it’s already the “next morning” and Jeremy is up making a healthy American breakfast which consists of thick pancakes (almost as thick as Leah’s bangs) and about 2 pounds of bacon fried in what I can only assume is Chelsea’s self-tanner mixed with a liter of Curve.  However, with this breakfast comes a major surprise.  That’s right.  A marriage proposal.  He legit wakes Leah up and hands her a tray of food and she says, “Did you make me breakfast?”  No bricks, he wants you to hold this tray of food so the bear downstairs and come up here and maul you to death.  As a sidenote, I have a feeling that Chelsea has been malled to death before.  Same/different.  Anyoddlydarkthickeyebrows, Leah opens the card that came with the flowers and in girly-almost-bubble-letters it says, “Will you marry me.”  Is she even awake yet, really?  She just kind of shyly answers yes, then says “thank you” and then asks him if he wants to eat.  I was fighting back tears the whole time…but only because I officially had my head in the oven and it was getting hot!  I feel like italics really brought that point to life.  Before Leah can even pick out pieces of pancake from her mouth-of-metal they’re already talking about having kids.  I think that’s a great idea.  I hope the geneticist has one of those “frequent visit” cards where after your tenth visit you get a free DNA scan or something.  I don’t know, I’m not a doctor…I don’t know how everything medical works.  Also, Jeremy and Leah both have alcoholic fingers.  Think about it.  You totally know what I mean.

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I love how when Leah calls her mom to tell her she’s engaged for the 11th time by the time she was 20, her mom is just like “Cool.  Deuces.”  I’m sure she was too busy giving Uncle Kracker a handy in the trailer, but still.   She could have pretended she was happy.  Kind of like how she pretends that her husband isn’t really her brother.  You know, kinda like that.  Eh, at least she’s in a happy relationship and I’m just here blogging about talking garbage cans.

Later it was time to bath those darn babies in the tub.  It’s quite the upgrade from washing them in what I could only assume to have been an old rust paint bucket that was also used to catch “grease drippings” from the old town community grill.  I mean, I think she legit used to use a toilet scrubber to scrape the poverty off the one with the swim goggles.  Either way, scrub-a-dub-dub there’s bad decisions (but wonderful blessings) in the tub!  Leah is making sure to chat with the girls about Jeremy being their new and improved daddy.  She was basically like, “He’ll never be your real daddy because he ain’t none no beaver that builds dams and junk, y’all!”  and the girls seem to understand what in the holy hell she’s talking about.  I can’t wait to see the latest Us Weekly with one of those chicks giving the side-eye to the rest of Western society.  Truth be told, they’re probably doing better than me so, therefore, I raise my glass to the young’ins with one hand and then smash said glass on my ding-dong until I pray for absolute sweet release.  Goodbye cruel world!  I jest.  Purples goggles rule.

Anyway, next thing you know Leah is getting her (puke) feet scrubbed (burp) and you can hear the (vomit) scrubbing during the entire staged conversation with her friend.  I love how her friend is totally committing to that “square hair” style that “the kids” seem to be really taking to these days.  It’s like get a combover and then spritz it with AquaNet and then just “have at it” with the world.  Leah’s braces are really popping on camera during this scene for me so, naturally, I feel blessed.  I’m also hypnotized by her bangs.  Did she let one of the girls use the left-handed Crayola scissors and just try to cut Origami into her forehead?  It’s like half spiked bangs and then the other half is entirely missing.  But let’s get back to brass tax and brass tacks (I never know which one) because Leah is letting the scripted beans spill by letting her pal know that she took out her IUD, IED, GED, OPP, and PYT because Jeremy might want to make some mistakes with her just like Corey did.  In fact, Leah is feeling a little queasy so she…you guessed it…might be knocked to the up.  She thinks she needs a pregnancy test but I’m pretty sure if she takes down her pants and dips her “gentlemen greeter” into that pedicure water and then throws herself at the wall she’ll get her answer.  Obviously if her vagiola sticks to the wall she’s pregnant.  Everyone knows that.  Oh, also, if she does in fact stick to the wall it also means we’ll have two Leap Years this year.  So it’s really a win-win for everyone involved.  Her friend is shocked by Leah’s constant dumb choices and voices her concern.  I mean, she may have been reciting the Gettysburg Address for all I know.  I was in a trance just looking at her hair…that is actually square.  She’s the Peppermint Patty of our generation.

In the end, Leah heads home and takes a pregnancy test that is conveniently stashed away in the top shelf of her bathroom.  Spoiler Alert:  She’s knocked up.  She immediately tells “the twins” that she is with child.  That’s a good idea.  I’m sure nothing can go wrong since you’re about 37 seconds pregnant.  At least one of the girls screamed “no!” when Leah asked them if they wanted another sister or brother.  I mean, I think she actually said, “another sissy or boobie.”  I need a white-trash-to-english dictionary on my laptop/Apple IIc.

Jenelle - Seriously it’s like trying to memorize all the characters in a classic game of “Guess Who?” to try and keep track of Jenelle’s roommates, friends, and enemies (and eventually possible baby daddies…we’ll get to that in a few sentences).  Big J already has a new roommate after she kicked out her old roommate of 2 days for quite possibly wearing her hoodie.  Truth be told, I’m dumber for trying to even figure it out.  So in order to take her mind off of her current disaster, she and a few friends get permission from Sheriff Barb to take Ja¢e to the museum for the day.  That’s nice.  Oh also, it gets real creepy real quick.  This is due to the fact that Jenelle’s two friends perform a puppet show for Ja¢e that somehow turns Lambchop’s bastard-out-of-wedlock sock puppet swearing up a storm and reenacting the fight between Jenelle and her old roommate.  Ja¢e looks like he has no idea what’s going on and Jenelle kinda looks like she’s watching her own episode of Teen Mom.  I was waiting for a yellow-sweat-stained-sock-with-bathroom-floor-pubes to show up during the puppet show, of course, playing the role of Keiffah.  The grass stains would clearly be there to represent the grassy knoll in which he lived.  It’s all about symbolism here at Camp IBBB.  Seriously, the puppet show was creepy…almost as creepy as that episode of Different Strokes where that random guy made Dudley and Arnold watch dirty cartoons with their shirts off.  No joke, what was that episode all about??  When I was little it forced me to never play “shirts vs skins” whilst at basketball camp.  However, Father T really thought it would help us win, so we disrobed.  Where was I?

Moments later Jenelle’s time-machine is finally completed and she gets a call from her ex-boyfriend and “father” of Ja¢e, Andrew.  He leaves her a message in which he says he hasn’t talked to her in about 2 yeas, but still loves her and wants to see Ja¢e.  He also ends it with “God bless you” so know totally know he’s a recovering alcho.  Good for him.  I guess.  Obviously Andrew is in our lives right now because Jenelle feels that she needs to really hit white-trash-rock-bottom and plow through the level of trash she’s already hit.  Therefore it’s time for her to come clean to her friend that Andrew may not be the daddy-o of Ja¢e.  That $ucks.  Evidently back in the day Jenelle and Andrew got into a “physical fight” and so she left and slept over Tori’s boyfriend’s house and accidentally got drunk and “tripped on d*ck”  So, welp, that random dude might be the father.  Jenelle never told anyone this because (A) it’s probably not true and she just needed a storyline outside of jail time or (B) she felt whore-like.  This is all very Maury-like, which is nice.  My only wish is that Sally Jesse Raphael was still on the air because you totally know that Jenelle would have been sent to “Teen Bootcamp.”  No joke, those were my favorite episodes.  Go figure.  The bad teens would just yell in Sally’s face “You don’t know me!  You don’t know me!”  Oh but we do!

Later Jenelle ends up going to lunch with Barb so she can let her know about Andrew calling and the possible future DNA testing.  I legit laughed out loud (or LOL’d like the kids say) when she told Barb about banging some other dude and then not telling anyone because she felt really “slutty” afterwards and Barb just goes, “Yeah well it happens.”  Ba da ba ba ba, I’m lovin’ it.  Clearly Barb speaks from experience…that wily little minx.  Barb is actually proud of Jenelle for deciding to face this crossroads in her life and getting a DNA test to find out who the baby daddy is.  She seems calm, but you know she’s thinking, “Why can’t we just God-damn go to the friggin’ mall like every other mother/daughter?”  I don’t blame her.  Also, I blame her.  Couldn’t they just figure out if Andrew is the father of Ja¢e by giving Ja¢e a beer and see if he drinks it?  I mean that’s how they used to do it back in olden-times, I believe.

It’s time for Jenelle to call Andrew back and talk to him about possibly not being the father of Ja¢e.  I would feel really bad if he’s not the father since he’s spent so much time and money on him.  Oh wait.  So the call with Andrew was pretty comical.  These two have the emotional development of about a 10 year old.  He’s like, “So I live in Florida now and so…”  And Jenelle says, “Yeah so I have my own place now.”  Wow you guys are up to a lot!  Suddenly Andrew is saying that he wants to see Ja¢e again and then literally asks if he’s 3 years old now.  Jenelle responds that he’s 2.  She should have been like, “Ja¢e is a girl and is 14 now, you’ve missed a lot.”  I should write for this show.  Jenelle finally lets Andrew know that he might not be that dad, so in the words of one Ms. Nene Leakes, “We gon take a DNA.  That’s what we gon do!”  Rumor has it that during this scene if you remained perfectly quiet and still you could hear a chant of “Jerry!  Jerry! Jerry!” in the background.  The good news is that Jenelle tells Andrew that he has a 50/50 chance of being the dad.  Isn’t that like having a 50% chance of rain?  It’s like it’s either going to rain or it isn’t.   Eh, I think my beer idea is going to be more accurate.

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Kail - Not a hell of a lot is going on with Kail in this episode.  Although her hair seems to be getting longer so that’s good news.  It’s almost like the longer her hair gets the more her chin disappears.  I’m sure there’s a connection there somewhere, but that’s for a geneticist to figure out and not me.  I am just a simpleton and not “of the world.”  Anychins, Kail has a big date with that dude Javi and they’re going to the diner, which is super romantic.  Nothing like having to run from the table to take an emergency Shasta McNasty due to diner-food.  Hot.  And the way the farts really rip on the plastic booth seat really classes things up a bit.  I tend to turn away when Kail is eating so I’m not really sure what happens during this scene.  However, at one point I heard Kail say to Javi, “So you know I have, like, a child right?”  Uh yeah.  Hopefully he pieced all that together from the camera crew and this little old show you’re on actually called “Teen Mom.”  The date conversation is standard and all too familiar.  It was awkward and everyone just talked about their random career goals and the like.  Yawn.  I’m sleepy-pants from all this talk.

Even though the date went well, Kail tells her friend she isn’t sure if she wants a relationship with Javi since she doesn’t want to keep parading new dads in front of Issac on the regular.  I think she’s trying to convince herself she isn’t Suzi, which is sad to me because I really want her to be just like Suzi, including the hairstyle.  I’m looking for full Suzi in the near future.  Oh, and since nothing else is really going on in this episode for Kail we’re forced to tag along for Issac’s first haircut.  Riveting.  They take him to a place that looks like the movie Barbershop, which I’ve never seen but did watch the commercial for it before so I’m pretty sure I know what the entire movie is about. Is Janet in the backroom of the barbershop throwing dice against the wall?  Hopefully, but one never will really know.  I would like to will that image to life….starting NOW!  Anyway, Issac gets his haircut and looks as bored by all of this as I am.  Although didn’t he already have his haircut in the very first scene and then he is back to long hair before the haircut?  I’m looking for a white flag to wave, stat.

In the end, Javi goes with Kail to meet Issac for the very first time.  They go to a place call Rascals which is like an indoor dirtier carnival where they give out the norovirus for free.  For real, after watching that scene I got up and washed my hands.  Even though they had “fun” Kail tells Javi that she is going to start out as friends because she doesn’t want to mess with Issac since he’s her best friend.  Javi says he’s cool with it and claims that Kail is going to be his best friend.  Awesome.  I hope Kail throws away her wood-chipper because I’m pretty sure Javi is going to stuff her in there.  Hair everywhere!

Chelsea – Still no GED.  However you can click here to join me on my Facebook page and click here to follow me on Twitter!

102 Comments

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  2. Jenelle's Dead Fetus Said,

    Leah is an unappreciative bitch! I like how Germy makes her a white trash breakfast and all she can say is “aw you tried to make me breakfast… the bacon is a little burnt” WTF BITCH he made you breakfast! Be thankful, ya cunt! Did anyone else find it extremely gross when Leah just threw food on Googles/Not googles highchair trays and just let them eat like they were wild monkeys? All while she’s peeing on a dollar store pregnancy stick? So fucking disgusting!

    I also like how at the end of the episode when they play the emo music, you can see good ole Babs giving Jace a dropper of some drugs! Lmao. That poor kid.

  3. Jenelle : Ke$ha concert :: Muslims : Mecca Said,

    While I don’t think Leah should’ve been such a B about the breakfast, it did look like shit! I live in the South and I have never seen bacon cooked in that much grease. Yuck!

  4. Conspiracy Man Said,

    I nearly vomited when I saw the twins eating ff their trays. Both kids looked like unwashed pigs, and I actually felt sorry for them. It was particularly gross when Goggles started smearing the grease all over the tray and herself. I also loved how both twins were completely clear about the fact that they did not want a new sibling. It seemed to me like they totally understood what she was asking them and they gave an honest opinion back to her that was based in more sense than Leah has ever possessed.

  5. Money Train Said,

    Jenelle quote: “I didn’t want anyone to know, I didn’t want them to think I was a whore.” This is said with a straight face AFTER she tells yet another friend. So, this random beach bum is at least the 5 person to know. I now know that when you want no one to know your dark secrets you tell everyone. Got it.

  6. Conspiracy Man Said,

    I am operating on memory here and can’t guarantee I am right, but I seem to remember that on 16 & Pregnant, Jenelle’s mother asked her if she was certain Andrew was the father, and Jenelle got really mad at her and yelled that nobody else could be the father because she has never had sex with anyone but Andrew.

    Does anyone else remember this? If it did happen, then something weird is going on – in this new episode, Jenelle says that her mother and Andrew already knew about the other guy. I could never imagine MTV filming something that was completely staged, but something doesn’t jibe here.

  7. Ayrton Carson Said,

    Glad to see you are back Patrick!

    I love how Jenelle can’t even take Jace to a kid’s museum without messing it up. Who would let their friends do a puppet show in front of a toddler that featured numerous “swear” words,ecspecially in a public setting? I just don’t understand how she can’t see that it’s a bad idea.

  8. butch goes to law school Said,

    i didnt even watch this trainwreck last night,i was watching larry hagmans final scenes in dallas.it was much better than teen mom2,this recap is all i need.

  9. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    YAY!!! Uncle Patrick is here!!! ….So…I got “yelled” at for this last week, but that is exactly what I’m talking about with the twins in just diapers, while Leah is fully dressed. I’m sorry, but she is white, hillbilly trash. And I call fucking bullshit on this whole “but, I…I..just want a family!!!” No, you want to not have to work or finish school, while a man supports your lazy ass!!! The twins are old enough for daycare now, so time to have a newborn so you have an excuse to stay home and talk on your damn phone whilst throwing chum to the girls in their highchairs. Lazy twat. The shiny diner that Kail and her new Latin lover were eating in is 5 minutes from folks house…best chocolate chip pancakes in Pennsylvania. I understand her “walls” are up, due to her horrible mom and all, but she is lucky she got a second date with javi…quite rude!!!

  10. Jenny Said,

    I can’t believe Leah got pregnant on purpose! I thought it had been an accident. Jenelle & her friends are such idiots. Jace has to deal with enough fighting in his life, that puppet show was inappropriate.

  11. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    And I agree with all y’alls comments on the scary puppet show. I thought, finally she is spending time with that poor kid. Janelle could fuck up a wet dream. And, yes, she DID have a screaming match with Barn about how “dare she” suggest that it wasn’t Andrew’s kid. Unbelievable.

  12. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    °°°screaming match with BARB, but I guess barn works, too…

  13. Brenda Walsh Said,

    This particular episode felt even more scripted/re-enacted than usual. The “proposal” was the one of the most awkward things I have ever seen. Leah literally was like “yes, let’s get married. Ok, let’s eat.” Neither one of them seemed very happy or excited. Nor did Leah’s mom who was basically like “uh, ok” when she learned her daughter was engaged, leading me to believe this ALL happened off camera and MTV forced them to re-enact it. Also, way to be fuzzy on the timeline ya’ll. How long were Leah and Jeremy together before getting engaged? How long were they engaged before Leah got pregnant? I call shenanigans on this timeline going down in the way MTV is implying.

    And yeah, the scene of the twins “eating” was absolutely stomach turning. WHAT did she feed them?

  14. Corey's Interpreter Said,

    The puppet show…all of these girls on both teen mom shows curse like sailors in front of their small, impressionable children. If they can’t control themselves while cameras are on them then just what the hell is going on when the cameras are off? I understand the OCCASIONAL slip-up and blurting one out, but it happens multiple times every show for every girl.

  15. butch goes to law school Said,

    you spent way too much time on chelseas recap..

  16. SZ Said,

    Someone help me with this math: Leah said several times in this episode that she was 16 when she got pregnant with the twins. Then she said several times that she is 20 now. And it was mentioned several times that the twins just had their 2nd bdays.

    20-16 still equals 4 right? Maybe in WV 20-16=2

    And I feel like in every scene Leah had a different set of braces each time – sometimes clear, sometimes metal, sometimes WOAH SHINY metal. It’s been many yrs since I had braces but last I checked you can’t completely overhaul the type of braces you have at each orthodontist visit. Change your blue bands to red for the upcoming pep rally, sure, but not metal to plastic back to metal.

    And I loved when Leah asked the twins if they want Mommy to have a baby and they screamed “NO!” Why does a 2 yr old make better life decisions than their mother?

  17. Jenellesbeerwhileonprobation Said,

    Methinks Leah already knew about the pregnancy and thats why she dropped out of school. She “all the sudden” got her BC removed? She looked like she knew she was pregnant while telling her friend and while she was at the salon. She even looked like she knew about the proposal. I call scripted all the way.

    Why was Chelsea calling her dad “old man” over and over on the phone? WHY are you crying in bed with Aubree over your sperm donors birthday? She is seriously effing that kid up.

    Kail keeps picking the same odd looking guys with big upper lips.

  18. Chin cysts Said,

    This wasn’t actually how Germy proposed, this was a re-enactment. He actually proposed to her around Christmas AFTER she found out she was preggers surprise surprise. Perhaps she knew she was already pregnant when she took the test and just re-peed on a stick for the camera.

    How could Jenelle’s scummy ass friends ruin what could have been a really nice time for Jace? And how dare they involve Lamb Chop in that!

  19. Jenellesbeerwhileonprobation Said,

    Leah is one of those people who cant keep a straight face while lying. I figured the proposal was fake. I know for a fact that he proposed because she got pregnant and MTV didn’t want her to look like a trashbag… again. She just stared at that pregnancy test with a blank expression. If the next episode is her telling him the fake news I may need to stop watching (oh no).

  20. max, the husky killa Said,

    leah had a miscarriage with the baby she took the pregnancy test with on this episode. THEN GOT PREGNANT AGAIN and hasn’t had the baby yet.

    she said last week that she couldn’t keep up with goggles therapy. what the fuck will she do when the newborn arrives? just give goggles to corey and call it a day!

  21. BricksMaDicks Said,

    Dear god where to start. I loved seeing Lamb Chop in the play, but why are you making her say “swear” words?! DAMNIT, DON’T RUIN THE KIDS CHILDHOOD! Poor, poor Jace. Seriously. Leah is so awkward. Her two babies smearing food and tea all over them while awkwardly staring at the camera men was all too much for me. I think Javi is cute. Way too cute for Kail…or is Kail as cute as they come in Pennsylvania? Who knows. And I can’t stand-ah how-ah Chelsea-ah talks-ah! SHUT THE FUCK UP-AH!

  22. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    @bricks: hey…I’m from Pennsylvania, and I’m downright adorable! Lol.

  23. social working degree Said,

    I seriously can’t believe Chelsea is still crying over Adam. what exactly does she miss about him? being treated like crap? wondering how long it will be before he up and leaves and doesn’t call for weeks? the way he barely interacts with his daughter?

    Jenelle..ugh. I went from thinking it was nice that she was finally doing something with Jace to WTF with that puppet show. poor kid.

    I agree that Javi is pretty cute. seems like a nice guy so far as well.

    every scene with Leah seems fake. she bashes the breakfast and then barely acts excited to get engaged. I too am confused about how she had the twins at 16 (or did she have them at 17 and was pregnant at 16?) and is 20 now with 2 year olds. and yeah the eating scene was hella gross.

  24. Amby's Hand Piercing Said,

    RUN FOR YOUR LIFE JAVI!….which clearly he did not do b/c he is now married to Kail and her hair and chins.

    Germy is SO awkward– and more than ever on last night’s episode. Its hard to watch.

    Leah proved last night that she is in fact even dumber than she looks. Why would you take out your BC on purpose when you’re 19/20 (?) and have twins??!?!! WHY!

  25. Chin cysts Said,

    Regarding Leah’s age, idk why she kept saying she was 20. This was filmed January 2012 so she would have been 19, turning 20 in April. She’ll be 21 this April, two marriages a divorce and 3 children yeehaw!

  26. Jenellesbeerwhileonprobation Said,

    Im from PA too and we are nothing like her I promise! Didn’t Leah say she wanted 5 kids or something? I don’t mean to be rude but you have one with developmental problems and one who didn’t make it. It may be a sign to stop.. or at least slow the F down.

  27. social working degree Said,

    but when Leah called her mom to tell her about being engaged, didn’t her mom respond with something like “well you’re 20 years old…” this was supposedly around the time when the twins were having their 2nd birthday party. like wtf? MTV doesn’t even try to have a storyline that makes sense.

  28. Kortney Said,

    If memory serves, Dawn’s response to this engagement was similar to her first one. Dawn seems to be very monotone with anything she says. And I thought I had heard that Leah got pregnant with her IUD still in and when they removed the IUD, she miscarried. Anyone else? If that were me, I would have immediately went back on birth control to avoid another oops. But, maybe she thought that Jeremy would leave her and break the engagement if she wasn’t preggers. I don’t know. I don’t watch the show anymore. I just read these recaps. I just can’t handle sitting through an hour of this. I would rather do my Zumba workout. :)

  29. crik Said,

    @Tyler/My-kulh: Who the hell “yelled” at you last week? I “asked” if it was a big deal to not dress your kids when they’re playing around the house. It’s called “dialogue” not “oh boo, they’re ganging up on me.” This week – definitely. Naked babies smeared with grease at mealtime. At least dress the kids when cameras are around.

    At this point I just feel bad for Jenelle. She’s obviously mentally ill. It’s kind of like being an adult (which I am) and catching a glimpse of some Nick at Nite show with 16 year olds kissing. It just feels totally wrong to be a spectator in her struggle to exist – much less mother a child.

    MTV is not even trying anymore. Scene: Isaac has no hair. Scene: Isaac has long hair. Scene: No hair. Scene: Isaac gets a haircut. I’m so insulted. What are we supposed to believe anymore?

    Randy is proud of Chelsea for taking (not passing) TAKING a GED test. He’s a dentist and she’s a high school dropout with a 2 year old and is in love with a guy who can’t stand her. I just …

  30. Leah's braces Said,

    From what I recall, Leah and Jeremy got engaged and announced her pregnancy in December, and they went to the “cabin in the woods” in Gatlinburg, TN the end of January. I know, because I was vacationing there at the same time. Leah miscarried in January… So, obviously when they filmed the proposal, they were already engaged, she was pregnant and had possibly already miscarried. Good job MTV.

  31. Ayrton Carson Said,

    There are multiple news reports out today that claim MTV is cancelling Teen Mom 2. Apparently they are getting tired of dealing with all the negative publicity Jenelle is causing. They have already filmed the next batch of Teen Mom 2 so that will air later this year but that could be the end of getting to watch these amazingly positive examples of teen motherhood. MTV hasn’t responded yet to the reports because they want to make sure they notify all the cast members first.

    We won’t know for sure till MTV issues a statement but my guess is that it’s probably true. They can always get a new batch of moms and it seems like this current cast is forcing their hand with all the terrible decisions they are making.

  32. Not Goggles Said,

    I can’t even watch this show anymore, I just read these recaps. I did see a commercial of Leah telling the twins that “Momma’s gonna have another baby, y’all!” and my boyfriend said “Way to go, b*tch!”

    I also saw that it’s rumored MTV is pulling the plug on TM2 because Jenelle is mentally unstable and has all these problems.. Anyone else hear that?

  33. BricksMaDicks Said,

    Well if it makes you guys feel better, I’m from WV (but the north-eastern part close to Ohio) and no one looks, acts or talks like Leah here. She’s from the Southern “hick” section. Embarrassing. >.<

  34. Don't tase me bro Said,

    Last week- did anybody else notice that Leah’s hair seemed to get longer in ever scene? Weird.

    This week her eyebrows were huge! And it looked like she was wearing a wig at the nail salon.

  35. Janells's Ugly Toes Said,

    If MTV allows Jenelle to continue on and has been doing any filming of her tweeting her miscarriage and her disgusting comments about blood etc…I can’t imagine they will keep any viewers that have any sense of decency at all.

    This chick is seriously mentally ill. She makes Amber look like a poster child for Mother of the Year.

    Come on MTV…get her off the screen. But don’t take away Janet and Chins and all the other train wrecks…..just substitute Barb and Pirate Mike as the new teen couple…we will all watch that! Send Jenelle to an institution and carry on.

  36. Hair feathers for Ke$ha Said,

    Kail- well I must be in the minority but I think Javi is disgusting looking just like Jo. But hey she has a type.

    Chelsea- her hair is getting whiter by the episode. Dad and mom congratulating her for finally taking a test while not working is what’s wrong with Chelsea and eventually Aubree. Ten bucks she gets a steak dinner for getting a D in math…

    Jenelle- holy hell. Youre too embarrassed to tell more than a few friends you’re a slut but America knowing is okay. Got it. And again with the original bad parenting, I like Barb but why is she proud of Jenelle for speaking the truth now? Weren’t they just berating Andrew for not paying child support?!

    Leah- is a terrible actress. And if MTV made her reenact a pregnancy that already ended, that’s sick. I think Goggles will get out of WV and become the surgeon general. I’m calling it now.

  37. The Other Lindsay Said,

    I asked my fiance and his friend who was over last night if Chelsea’s look of extremely orange skin and extremely white hair was a good look and they both agreed NO. What in the hell would possess her to think that combo looks good? IT DOESN’T!

    I was hoping the puppet show was being put on by employees of the museum and Jenelle was gonna get up and beat their asses for talking smack about her like that. But alas…

    Leah’s eyebrows were some kind of terrible mess this week. I knew something was “off” then realized she was harboring runaway caterpillars on her face. You would think she would have gotten them waxed while she was at the fancy schmancy WV salon pedicure place. ICK.

  38. me2 Said,

    Goggles as surgeon general?! Bahaahahah, classic.
    This episode just confirmed what we all already knew. Leah is in fact a whore who thinks nothing of herself unless a male is jizzing in an orfice of hers. Sad, and hopefully Goggles will teach the other kids better, as no one else in that holler will. She did indeed say (or have a minion report for her) that she miscarried due to her IUD, which is common for pregnancies that occur while on that form of birth control. Why lie if you already know MTV filmed you telling the real deal?

  39. crik Said,

    It’s funny (or sad) that there is so much wrong with these girls that no one even commented on Leah’s classy hickey. I realize those things happen in the heat of the moment and I’ve had my fair share – - but not when CAMERAS ARE OUTSIDE OF THE BEDROOM DOOR AND THE SCRIPT CALLS FOR A BREAKFAST-IN-BED-SCENE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.

    I wonder if Jermy said “this is probably where we sleep” because the other rooms would have to have gone to the film crew. Just thinking out loud on that last part.

  40. J Said,

    Javi is legit attractive, and seriously he seems well rounded. Out of all those girls I have the most respect for Kail, she tries to keep it together, and I think she does a decent job. Better than half the teen moms I know (I live a couple hours away from where Chelsea lives, seriously she exemplifies the midwest to a T, yes most females out here are ignorant. We’re still going to college for our MRS degrees :/).

  41. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    Fine, then. Let’s call it my own personal opinion and pet peeve that it’s trashy, hillbilly, and lazy when kids run around in just diapers when everyone else is fully dressed, unless it’s 100 degrees in the shade or the bath is running. A few folks “dialogued” that they saw nothing wrong with it, and it didn’t make Leah, or anyone else, bad parents. That would be your opinion. Leah sure proved my point last night, though. Those kids looked dirty, disgusting, and neglected while she was fully dressed and had full hair, make up and manicure done. That is all…

  42. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    With all the WV skoolin’ maybe Leah thought IUD was really DUI and figured that was sumptin’ she didn’t want.

  43. butch goes to law school Said,

    i get what tyler is saying.its not so much that theyre running around in diapers,its that they all look like they havent been bathed in months,and when the do wear clothes,they are always dirty.look at chelseas house and leahs,clothes everywhere,leah feeding the kids on that gross carpet..

  44. friggin GED Said,

    Did Leah have LC’s old mustache going on?

  45. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    Sigh, where to begin…

    Kailyn is the only TM2 mom that I have any kinda respect for.

    Chelsea, Jenelle, and Leah act like it is their life’s purpose to be as trashy as humanly possible. I didnt even know that rich kids could be complete trash, but Chelsea has shown me otherwise. All she does is eat, bleach, fry, and whine. You would think after however many seasons she has seen herself on tv she would realize (or one of her “friends” would tell her) how pathetic she looks/is. And its sad that Chelsea does all that extra shit to her face and hair bc she actually has a really pretty face. One thing I can say for Chelsea though, at least she isnt 20yrs old marrying every man she meets.

    Poor Jace. He is going to watch these episodes one day and see that his mother does not give a fuck about him. He is going to see that she basically popped him out of her vag straight into his grandmas arms and never looked back. She claims she cant afford to get custody back or whatever right now, but she can afford to upport her drug habit and the drug habits of the trashy pieces of shit she chooses for boyfriends and fiances and husbands dope and prance around like a Dlist celebrity thinking shes the bee’s knees bc shes on TEEN MOM. I used to sympathize for Jenelle at the beginning but now its just like damn bitch you like the negative attention/drama youre in. She lives for it.

    Sweet baby Jesus. Leah. I think she sees these kids and tashtastic, tabloid-bound engagements as her mealticket. ” high im leah and all i do is talk like a cuntry (pun intended now that i think about it )4 yr old and pop out babies yawl!”

    I hope they take this crap off the air- the teen mom 3 moms seem like they have pretty logical heads on their shoulders.

  46. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    Trashtastic*

  47. Money Train Said,

    My BIL got my sister pregnant when he was 16. A month later he turned 17. (He has a November birthday.) Then, my nephew was born the following July. In November, my BIL turned 18. Therefore, the year my nephew turned two, BIL was 20. I’m not saying that’s how Leah’s math works, but that’s how it worked out in my family. 20 years ago, they didn’t have Teen Mom. If they did, I bet I would be a famous secondary character. I’d be rolling in the ONES!! Or a Twenty-aire as the McDonald’s call it.

  48. Bubby or Sissy Said,

    Randy: “whether or not you passed, it’s still a mile stone” … I’m sorry… What?!? How can we even blame Chelsea for her pathetic existence when this is what is fed to her.

    On top of Jenelle’s Bipolar Disorder and Substance Abuse does anyone definitely think she also has Borderline Personality Disorder? Talk about unstable relationships. She cannot get along with a single person consistently.

  49. Amber's Acne Said,

    Damn you Patrick, stop having a life! We need these recaps. I about died last week without it.

    Leah looks HORRIBLE with that hair. When Jeremy “woke her up” in full make-up, it looked like she had a unibrow and a mustache. I was totally confused.

  50. Amber's Acne Said,

    “….she took out her IUD, IED, GED, OPP, and PYT.”

    OMFG, I just spit my drink out everywhere. Damn you, Patrick!

  51. butch goes to law school Said,

    its all over the place that jenelle may have gotten the show the ax..

  52. Barbwahs credit score Said,

    Leah looks like a gremlin. Jeremy is Kd Lang in drag. Watching those twins eat made me want to vomit.

  53. Jenellesbeerwhileonprobation Said,

    BricksMaDicks- I also live within 15 mins of the PA/Ohio/WVa border and every once in a while I hear someone speak like Leah but I still need to watch their scenes in CC.

    MTV has released an official statement on the TM2 show… Im off to read it now in suspense. If Jenelle ruined this for us all she must go down.

  54. Catelynn's Chewed Off Fingernail Polish Said,

    When all is said and done (and cancelled), can I have Goggles?

  55. once upon a time Said,

    The 16-20 thing.. she might just be ‘counting ahead.’ I was just turned 17 when i had my son. He’s two and a half now and I say I’m 20, even though I’m still 19 for a few more months. Just how I do things lol.

    Does anyone know what Leah was feeding the kids? I was trying to figure it out, but I’m clueless..

  56. adumb's text message to bricks Said,

    “I was waiting for a yellow-sweat-stained-sock-with-bathroom-floor-pubes to show up during the puppet show, of course, playing the role of Keiffah.”

    I think I may have burst a blood vessel with that line. OMG, hilarious.

  57. Chelsea's Head That Looks Like A Meringue Said,

    Tyler Loves My-Kuhl – you calling Barb “Barn” by mistake made me laugh my arse off and I don’t know why.

    I would totally understand if this show gets canned…enough already, trash bags. At least the Teen Mom 1 girls tried to pretend they were making something better of themselves (even though we all know they weren’t).

    All of the cash these girls are earning by acting like giant turds should be put into a trust fund for the babies when they’re older – after all, they didn’t ask for the first few years of their lives to be documented in front of a world-wide audience. I always get a good laugh out of these recaps (and if my boss ever restricts this blog at my workplace after finding out how much time I spend on here during business hours, I’ll cry), but I’ll never stop feeling sorry for those kids. Seriously, I know ten year-olds with more sense than these teenage “moms” – and Jenelle? Lost cause. I second the idea to kick her off the show and let Barb/Barn take over her segments…she’s the only character who doesn’t need a script. She’s gold!

  58. Chelsea's Head That Looks Like A Meringue Said,

    Also, I don’t remember that scene between Jenelle and Barb during her 16 and Pregnant episode regarding Jace’s paternity, but my memory is vague…I’ll need to watch that episode again online to double-check. Who needs a life?
    It does sound like a made-up storyline but, if it is true, then could someone please clarify if “Tori” (as in Tori’s boyfriend) is the same Tori that Jenelle moved in with last season? So Jenelle decided to share a house with her friend without telling her that she rooted her boyfriend and may have even been impregnated by him? No wonder Tori hit her with a drumstick.

    Finally, Chelsea will pine for Adumb-AH until the day he kills her and Aubree/Aubrey (whatever; I don’t care). Mark my words.

  59. Barbwahs credit score Said,

    @Once that may be how you do things but the gremlin has no clue how old she is. The only time she gets a confirmation is when she calls Momma Dawn to tell her how she is getting married or divorced or preggo and Dawn tells her age, but aftewr that, like dressing/cleaning her kids, she forgets yall!

  60. Kortney Said,

    In regards to Leah, I live in the western part of VA. We border WV to the west. She lives about 2.5 hours from me. I have traveled over that way a time or two and I can say that most of the people over there do talk and sound that way. Shoot, we even have a good many WV people that come over here for work and they act and talk that way also. A

    On a sidenote that I found funny, the MTV show Buckwild is filmed in Kanawha County. My mom was born and raised in that county. LOL I just realized this a few days ago when I looked up Sissonville to find out where in WV it was.

  61. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    @Chelsea ’s head: my auto correct changed it to “barn” and I didn’t catch it fast enough. Also, I could very well be wrong about the paternity fight barn and Janelle had. I seem to remember trashbag and Andrew leaning against a car and BARB saying something to the effect of “do you know for sure the kid is Andrew’s???” If I’m wrong, I’ll eat my words like the gross breakfast Jermy made Leah, then smear the grease all over myself like goggles. Those poor kids….

  62. Bitch Jungle Said,

    isn’t it obvious that mtv is making up falsestorylines at this point? i.e. jace’s real dad. Andrew and Jace look exactly alike. at least i think so.

    Jenelle s definitely borderline to who ever brought that up. i am glad she miscarried. could you even imagine?

  63. Kiki Said,

    I love how Leah said to Jeremy that no one had ever brought her breakfast in bed before. Of course not, your f’in 19/20 years old you slut! You should be working and going to school at this time in your life. Not playing house. Just my opinion :)

  64. Joe's Rap Career Said,

    1. The twins were disgusting in their high chairs 2. Very awkward marriage proposal 3. I’m becoming more and more afraid of Kailyn with each episode.

  65. Joe's Rap Career Said,

    @tyler loves my-kuhl, I’m from PA too and I was thinking the same thing haha

  66. Mandy Said,

    Where the hell is my Honey Boo Boo Halloween and Thanksgiving recap?

  67. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    I kind of really want Patrick to recap *bad girls club*love and hip hop and *buckwild. Dont judge me for watchin these shows, they make me feel better- judge me for that.

    Anddd its sad to say, but im glad Jenelle miscarried too. Not out of malice for her but for the babys sake. And i may be wrong with my time on this but how many weeks ago did jenelle get sent away bc her mom caught her doping up? Do yall (shut up) think she might have been using while pregnant thus leading to the miscarraige? ….

  68. T*ts on a Stick Said,

    I wrote this really long comment yesterday but the internet kept eating it, then I’d try again and it would tell me I already said that, and I’m just not motivated to type it all up again today.

    Love how Leah compares everything Germy does to Cory. I’ll be he just loves hearing it. That proposal was the most awkward thing ever.

  69. TMs Only Passed Test: EPT Said,

    This episode really got to me. All of these girls are complete idiots!

    Jenelle is and will always be a druggie nd alcoholic. She slept with Tori’s then bf & has been wondering all this time if Jace could be her so called BFF’s exs baby. Somehow, this doesn’t surprise me one bit. Nothing Jenelle does anymore is shocking.

    Kail you were already bangn Javi before moving into your new spot. Stop acting like you just met the boy bowling. Also I agree, Javi is NOT attractive. I just don’t see it..I like his voice though lol

    Leah you are a filthy whore. I agree with Tyler loves Mykuhl, her kids ALWAYS look messy. Yet when you see them with Corey, their well dressed. Leah must spend her entire day doing her makeup, hair, nails and kegal excercises. Shes a stay at home mom. The least you can do is pick up your messy house for the few hours the camera crew will be over. But didnt that cameramen on Reddit say she used to have bloody tampons on the floor for weeks? Tampon girl should try one of those suckers…

    Chelsea looks sooo bummy in every single episode! & the white hair with smeares orange in her face is just atrocious. Why does NO ONE tell her?!! Also, Im starting to believe Chelsea uses her MTV money but they put it on Papa Randy..Her crying over Adam on his birthday really really wanted me to drag her out the bed nd kick her all the way to adams, tie them up to a tree nd just leave them there for eternity.!

  70. Janourted Fetus Said,

    Hey y’all! (I’m from NC so I can say that)! I stopped watching this mess some time ago but last week I saw a repeat of “16 and Pregnant” and immediately googled “Hope’s Mom’s eyeshadow”, which delightfully led me straight to you and now, I am caught up and have been LMAO ever since lol teehee!!! Too many thoughts about the whole thing so I’ll just ask one question: Does anyone else think Tyler laughs like Giovanni Ribisi in “The Other Sister”?

  71. Anonymous Said,

    Keefah sock puppet legit made me pee myself a little.

  72. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    Omg @ept my friend made me watch the tampon whore. Why couldnt she suck a dick to get famous like everyone else?

  73. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    I wish there was a website where all the cameramen went to talk shit and give us the inside scoop.

  74. Janourted Fetus Said,

    I stopped watching this crap some time ago, but last week I happened upon an episode of “16 and Pregnant” that I’d never seen before. I immediately googled “Hopes moms eyeshadow” cause I couldn’t get over it, and was delightfully directed here and I’ve been LMAO ever since lol teehee!

    Here’s the thing: I was a teen mom (cue Night Ranger music) and I’m damn shore glad MTV wasn’t around to record and “bastardize” every idiotic fantasy I came up with (cue Aldo Nova).

    I think these girls should be required to meet with a therapist (or some damn body) and that footage be shown along with their stories every “episode”. If I had been left with my immature brain and a camera crew during those years there is no doubt I would have been all aboard the “life is just a fantasy” train!

    Having said all that, I am enjoying moving up from self-hatred, to good ole American hatin’! I hate these girls hair, nails and tans (and desperate decisions)… My daughter went through that, plus big hoop earrings (the Rosita stage, as we affectionately refer to it) but I got her German/Irish wanna be Puerto Rican aaaasss on some birth control, and Debra Claws forbid, had that failed, I SHORE NUFF wouldn’t have agreed to let a frikkin camera crew follow her around documenting it… WHAT’S WRONG WITH THESE GD PARENTS- ’scuze me GD GRANDPARENTS?!

    Don’t let me spoil the fun! All this hatin has been very therapeutic for me! Although I’m glad MTV wasn’t around during my pickling, I could have used some of this no-nonsense feed-back baha! My kids are fine, upstanding citizens btw- or rebellious children of a teen mom… either way ;)

  75. Janourted Fetus Said,

    Sorry bout reiterating- I got the teen mom syndrome!

  76. Isaac's Giant Sneakers Said,

    SZ – YES I noticed the braces. SOOO annoying. Their hair, nails, everything change so much from episode to episode.

    Leah’s hair and eyebrows were cringeworthy. If I have a dinner party attend I get my nails done and usually a new outfit. These girls are being filmed for a television show and look like stage X disasters!

    What is up with Chelsea-ah’s sweat suit collections? Does she own any clothes without a hood and/or elastic waste?

    I have no words for Jenelle. They need to get her off this show ASAP.

  77. Felicity Said,

    Oh my gosh. A reference to “The Other Sister”. That movie is hilarious and I don’t think it’s supposed to be. Tyler laughs just like that. That’s awesome.

  78. Catelynn's Chewed Off Fingernail Polish Said,

    Ever noticed that Tyler’s head is too small for his body, but his hands are gi-normous. I think that’s some sign of in-breeding. Might ’splain a lot.

  79. crik Said,

    Whoever mentioned what Jace will think when he grows up – I – very sadly and unfortunately – predict a future of terrible grades, depression, despair, possibly high school dropout, drugs, crime, maybe prison. How can he not? Even if Barb is a great grandmother when Jenelle isn’t around, that house is so fully toxic when Jenelle comes by (which likely happens only when the producers ask her to) that Jace’s poor little brain is developing the worst coping mechanisms a human can possibly develop.

    Tyler/My-kuhl – I don’t even have kids. That’s why I *asked* if it was a big deal that the kids were playing in diapers. We’re in agreement here on most points. One thing I would keep in mind, some commenters did say that they are moms and get why Leah doesn’t dress her kids for play (not let them run around greasy and naked all the livelong day when Leah is primped and primed). Like I said, there is so much to legitimately criticize.

    Cory does dress the kids but I’m guessing that for the 2 days (and 1 night?) he has them he probably doesn’t do laundry (though according to him, Leah doesn’t either. Or maybe Leah just didn’t want to do YOUR nasty laundry, Cory). But overall, I agree that kids should be dressed. Hope that finalizes this IBBB debate.

  80. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    @crik: I have five great kids, and maybe it’s my own personal pet peeve, I don’t know WHY I feel that way about kids running around in just diapers. When my lovlies were small, I would let them run around without shirts, but shorts over the diaper if it was very hot outside. They would run around in a diaper if I was getting their clothes ready to go out, or at bath time, of course. Maybe it’s just my personal “hang up”, but it really bothers me. Let me also say, I in no way think I’m a better parent than anyone. I will never win mother of the year. And, if you think it’s cool to let your kids do that: your kids, your choice. I wasn’t trying to be condescending at all. But: when Leah is wearing a shirt, jeans, and socks and the twins are all but naked, that’s just lazy to me. If she had been in shorts and a tank top, I probably wouldn’t have thought twice about it. And the scene with them eating was totally disgusting!!! I am amazed she didn’t toss one of them the used pregnancy test to gnaw on. If I came across as condescending, I apologize.

  81. tyler loves my-kuhl Said,

    ….and I think I said it before, but I think Jace has the makings of a serial killer…a woman hating one. He looks sad and depressed and very confused all the time. I honestly don’t think I have EVER heard that kid laugh. It’s a shame, he seems like a sweet boy. He reminds me of that report they did years ago about the orphans in the foreign country who never got any affection at all. Just meals and clean clothes. He always has a “faraway” look in his eyes, like he KNOWS something isn’t right.

  82. Jenelle's "addiction" Said,

    I am finally getting to watch the show.

    Isaac throwing the skeet ball upperhanded style at the skeet ball game was cute along with answering”dinosaurs” to everything. I don’t know why Kail is saying she doesn’t want to bring Issac around boyfriend when she took him on a date. Seriously, adults that go back into the dating world go on a lot of dates, usually when the child is with tue other parent or grandparents. They don’t introduce them to their children until they are sure it is a serious thing and will last more than two years, and that is after they talk to the kid first.

    Jenelle looked trashy slumped down with her legs spread out wide when she was sitting on red red couch while on the phone with Andrew.

    I think the twins were smearing chocolate milk mixed with the brown sugar from their pastry breakfast.

  83. Conspiracy Man Said,

    Janourted fetus-

    I am guessing that many on this site are not old enough to get the Aldo Nova reference, but I did and it was completely hilarious. Aldo Nova is not mined for satire nearly enough in my mind. Thanks for really bringing it home. I remember one douche in my.highschool brought an entire car stereo, complete with car battery, and installed it in his gym locker just to play Lif is just a Fantasy. Litetally, that was the only tape he seemed to have, and it played every time I showered for basketball for two years.

  84. 电视棒 Said,

    分析的很透彻，很欣赏你的看法，学习了。

  85. Kyyyy's Shart Said,

    It’s never really bothered me how Chelsea talks until last episode when she was talking with the real estate woman in the house. She was all, “Oh, this is a kewwwwwt rewwwwm. This could be Aubreeee’s rewwwwn. I have a daughterrrr, she’s tewwwww” blehhhhssdfasdsdfghj…

  86. Janourted Fetus Said,

    Oh em GEE Conspiracy Man! That is freakin hilarious with the club locker! I knew a guy (may be rest in peace) that had a whole bar set-up in his locker, but no music… Wow, if only those two could have met! They would make fabulous teen mom grandparents (or great-grandparents as it were)!

    I wanna make Leah note… She looked West Virginia haggard- like her mouth was all sunken in- and lawd gawd the eyebrows. I don’t believe her life is her own anymore- she sold it to the devil and now she has to follow the script. It’s pitiful really…

  87. Janourted Fetus Said,

    Lol: “mined for satire” I love it ;)

  88. Janourted Fetus Said,

    Here’s one they need to add to the soundtrack: “18 and life” Skid Row lol

  89. The Pacifier Still in Use at H/S Graduation Said,

    This entire episode for me was one giant “WHAT THE WHAT?”

    You are 19 or 20, already divorced with two kids, one that has developmental problems and you have been dating a guy that was an acquaintance of your ex-husband that decided to Facebook you when he heard that you and your ex (who is supposed to be an acquaintance/friend) and you were no longer together – and after two month’s you take out (or hopefully had it removed by a medical professional) your IUD?

    Leah does not even bother to take care of the kids she has now. She admits that she is “behind” on Googles therapy. As we have all noted, those kids are filthy and at the very best unkept looking, while she takes the time, money and effort to get her hair colored how often? Extensions? Nails done? All of that not only costs money but takes time. Where are her kids then? Does she take them with, and like Amber and Gary let her kids “declare a jihad” (as our dear IBBB once stated) on the place while she is getting beautified? Or dump them on someone? I’m hoping she at least does this while the kids are with Corey, but something tells me that is not the situation.

    And yes, the scene with the kids and the food was downright disgusting, especially with her standing in the background in the bathroom grinning like a cheshire cat when the plus sign came up that she was pregnant. “Hey y’all, I done got myself knockered up again!!! Maybe I will get my own spin off show! “Spittin’ out babies…. WV Style!” Yeehaw!”

    Chelsea? I feel so sorry for little Aubree. That baby was asleep, and that whack job goes in there to lie down and sob because she is missing Adumb’s birthday? You know it’s a crying (pun intended) shame that she does not put that amount of effort into taking care of her kid or watching her dogs that she does worrying about someone that treats her like crap. Honestly? Had I ever gotten a text from the father of my child about “how do I get my name off that mistake?” that would be the last of him.

    Jenelle is just trash it’s true, but it’s becoming more and more evident that she really does have some kind of mental illness. There is really something wrong with that girl. Poor little Jace is so blank eyed all the time, and watch his face during that puppet show. Poor kid.

    And, although we all like to have our laughs at Kails oily face and chinless appearance? She is the most decent Mother of either Teen Mom or Teen Mom 2, and she has the least amount of support, and also had the least amunt of upbringing. She is at least in school to get an education, and it seems that both she and Jo are sincerely affectionate and loving to Isaac. As far as him not talking yet? Something dawned on me. She told him before to hold her hand in Spanish, and if I remember correctly from her 16 and Pregnant episode, there were a few times when Jo’s family spoke Spanish to each other. Many times children from multi-lingual homes are a little slower to initially speak. When they do, it’s often a mix of the languages, then all of the sudden they just kind of start talking. This I can say from experience growing up with parents that one spoke English and Spanish to my siblings and I, and the other spoke English and Dutch to us.

    MTV has created monsters with these girls. Although I have a feeling much of what they do for the camera – Leah always trying to trap a guy into marrying her, Jenelle getting high, high, ya always gettin’ high, Chelsea whining and baby talking; and of course don’t get me started on the original Teen Mom (GAHHHHH!), these girls are idiots to begin with, and now they are fame whores. I think they will and do anything they can just to stay in the spotlight. I feel so sorry for all of those babies who are stuck in these situations.

  90. Jenellesbeerwhileonprobation Said,

    I have to mention Farrah here. She released a video this week of how to do situps in bed. She was in a bra and it was downright pathetic. I can just see her crying every night over Jenelle being the center of attention and coming up with these desperate last stitch (see what I did there?) efforts at fame.

    Catelynn also lost 100 pounds…

  91. Corey's Interpreter Said,

    I think if Leah were to get a spinoff on Mtv, it would have to be named “F*ckwild”.

  92. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    Coreys interpreter, hey-oh!

  93. Conspiracy Man Said,

    Janourted- you will be completely freaked out to know that Aldo Nova Locker Stereo guy has like 15 Duis, starting early, right out of high school in the good old days when you could still kind of get away with that. Now he is permanently driver’s licenseless. He would have gotten along well with Locker Bar guy. They could hace jammed Aldo Nova while doing the booze cruises out on the back roads.

  94. Conspiracy Man Said,

    Pacifier-
    I am with you on the famewhore thing. Can you imagine farrah sitting around, stewing about her website traffic being taken by Jenelle? During the Jenelle downward spiral Farrah did a bunch of wacky stunts to try to get back some attention – she wore a giant, fake unibrow and defended her recent waxing; she tried to get some minor rapper to collaborate with her and went batshi* when he ignored her; and she did the ridic matress workout.

    She was screaming for attention, and it looks like she is trying every possible way to make money and prolong her 15 minutes without doing any real work. Ive heard nothing about her restaurant lately, so it sounds like that will never actually happen. She is a celebrity now and should be doing celebrity things and not stoop to regular employment like the restof the commoners.

  95. Conspiracy Man Said,

    Farrah also called Nicky Minaj (sorryabout the spelling, I’m not a fan), “ghetto”. Her agent must have told her to do any kind of press releaee to get back her rightful share of Teen Mom fan traffic – there is a limited pool of people who follow these girls, so they have to fight each other for attention. When one has drama, they all have to start some shi* inorder to remain in the public spotlight by getting a new and idiotic tatoo, dissing a celebrity or changing a boyfriend.

    I mean, what makes Farrah qualified to be giving exercise and fitness advice. Does she know that she is opening the door to lawsuits if someone slips amdisc or otherwise hurts themselves doing her insane workout? There is probably a good reason why nobody has ever released an”exercise in bed” exercise plan. There are people out there with actualneducation and training in those types of things. Is she going to start doling out tax advice next? Will she do. A web education seminar on how to be your own lawyer or how to do minor surgical procedures?

  96. Conspiracy Man Said,

    Finally, Farrah likes to point out how she is the most educated one of the teen moms, so maybe she feels qualified to give advice on subjects in which she knows nothing. I call bs on her education because the one common indicator of eduction is the ability to communicate thoughts effectively in writing. Her written blogs are so poorly written that they are almost unreadable. She writes like a 4th grader, and I can guarantee that her book was actually ghostwritten (maybe by her mom), despite the fact that she says it wasn’t.

  97. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    @conspiracyman farrah called nicki minaj ghetto? Hmmmmm… Does anyone remember on her twitter maybe a year ago when she was twitpicing and bragging her ass off about hanging out and becoming buds with Trina? Now..idk if u listen to their music but they are equally slutty. Equally meanin extremely.

  98. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    1 more thing, a 2yr cooking degree where you “text” your final to your teacher does not make you qualified to do anything except be a punchline.

  99. ThisShitIsGettingSadNow Said,

    I would rather listen to catelynn than farrah abt workout/weigt loss tips.

    Cate-worked for it
    Farrah-fake

    No comparison really.

  100. The Pacifier Still in Use at H/S Graduation Said,

    Well, here is honestly hoping Catelynn worked for her weight loss. For all we know, she dipped into the “family savings” which in that family might have just been “Butch’s coke stash” to lose the weight.

  101. your momma Said,

    I legit wanted to puke when the twins were slathering food all over themselves.

  102. jen Said,

    Thank you so much, I now have a craft project. project I must make a Keiffah sock puppet RIGHT NOW! I just need to find some loose black pubes…

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