ImBringingBloggingBack

Celebrity Gossip and Pop Culture Blog

Dec
07

Teen Mom 2 Recap: Occupy Barb’s House

teen-mom-barb-in-blackteen-mom-barb-helps-packteen-mom-barbs-main-squeezeteen-mom-barb-mocks-trashteen-mom-jenelle-tries-to-eat-barbteen-mom-laundry-day!

facebook ibbb twitter ibbb

Jenelle – No more sleeps until we find out what in the hell has happened to Barb and her little b*tch of a daughter (that’s you) Jenelle. I was good all year and even my Elf on a Shelf (which I pasted Barb’s face on and gave it a blue shirt) told me I was good and is rewarding me with a nice brawl right here in the very first crapisode!  I mean, the fact that these two can get right in each others face and not bite off an ear like Barb was Tyson and Jenelle was Holyfield is, well, beyond a concept that my mind is even able to grasp.  You know that this episode for Barb will be somber as she is sporting an all black shirt.  Of course I miss the blue shirt, but apparently it’s laundry day and perhaps Barb-o-Matic should just check the front lawn with the rest of the clothes.  Can you even imagine what the white-trash neighbors must think of these two?  It’s like an episode of COPS is playing out their front window each and every day.

The good news is that Jenelle is still sporting her blue A&F hoodie sweatshirt that must smell like the perfect mix of Keiffah, tomato soup, and sub-par effort.  Even little baby Jace, who doesn’t have a chance in hell at life thanks to these two, seems to give Jenelle the side-eye whenever she’s around.  He probably thinks she’s the boom mic operator for all he knows.  Moving on. However, before we can get to the fight, which is sadly the last 5 minutes of the episode, we get to see that Jenelle and Kieffah are sneaking around town because Barb will not allow her to see him.  She seems to think that she can get Jenelle arrested for dating him.  I seem to think that Barb can get arrested for sporting some new thick maroon bangs this season.  I mean really, where do the bangs begin and the top of the scalp end?  Eh, it’s one for the great philosophers.

I have to admit it’s like time has not passed at all for this crew.  Barb is still nuts, Kieffah and Jenelle are wearing the same clothes in, literally, all of their scenes (both seasons), and Jenelle’s random friends are still laying in the same position that they were last season in their disgusting “house.”  Seriously, that house makes my junk itch just looking at it.  I believe it’s technically the set of the Golden Girls and they just let it go.  Everything looks flammable and like it smells like Lindsay Lohan’s spray-tanned-freckled-wrists.  Smears everywhere.  Oh, and that dude with the blond mustache may or may not know he’s trying to school Jenelle on what a loser Keiffah is.  Isn’t that kinda like a Level II sex offender telling a Level III sex offender that they’re doing something wrong?  Same/same, no?

Even though Jenelle and Special K need to sneak around it provides endless laughs for me as she needs to still pick him up right near the grassy knol and corner of a random side street.  Classic Kieffah.  At least it finally explains why he’s always wearing that damn green sweatshirt.  Clearly, he’s trying to camouflage in the grass to keep safe from bears in the woods.  I call that good planning.  That Kieffah is a real go-getter!  However, even after Jenelle made it home by mid-night in order to watch Jace, Barb wouldn’t let her mind him for the day and Jenelle has a mini break-down and continues to make bad decisions thereafter and, well, beforehand too.  To sum up, she is a walking disaster.  Now that we’re on the same page, she even swears at Barb by calling her things like “Dumb b*tch” and “Stupid b*tch” and the like.  I wonder where she gets it from? Let me tell you a little something, if I ever talked to my mother that way I would still be explaining to people why my foot is growing out of my bum-bum.  Nevertheless, Jenelle goes out to see Kieffah and when he drops her off at the house, Barb catches her…like in a “To Catch a Predator” kind of way.  I was just waiting for her to ask Jenelle to take a seat and offer her some lemonade. However, instead of offering Jenelle lemonade she is offering us, as viewers, a nice glimpse of her rump-roast that’s in some tightly fitting stone-washed mom jeans.  As a wise man in his basement taping a public access television show once said, “Schwwwing!”  And then the fight begins…

Whilst it is fun to dissect the fight between Barb and Jenelle (that looks like it was the same as last years fight with the exception of Barb in black) it’s even more fun to pick out the true gems that come out of Barb’s loco boca.  For instance:

  • Well Jenelle, I’ve seen you wif Keiffaaah.  Get out.  Yaw done.
  • This is it, yaw done. Yaw nevaah heaah again.  Good-bye.  (Very formal)
  • Well guess what?  I hope you have fun livin’ in the street wif yaw boooooyfriend (Brilliant)
  • That’s it, go stay wif yaw scummy-ass boyfriend.
  • I thought you broke up with this son-of-a-b*tch?
  • I don’t want it on my property (drops laundry on the sidewalk).  Tell yaw boyfriend to come and pick you up.
  • Yaw too selfish to take care of yaw own kid, ya lil’ b*tch! (Tears in my eyes, whilst I applaud)

I tried to keep the quotes down to a quiet shout, but there were just too many to choose from.  Even the simplest of sentences makes me squeal with delight and, to be honest, the fact that she ended the fight with, “ya lil b*tch” really makes be believe that it was just for me.  Just. For. Me.   I also quite enjoyed when Barb passes the baby off to Mike and he gets smacked with the label, “Barbara’s Boyfriend.”  I mean, come on this sh*t just doesn’t make itself up.  And did you see the force she used when passing the baby off to Mike?  Someone has been getting some bigger muscles from cutting the honey turkey sliced thin at the deli counter in Walmart!  Move over Shake Weight!  It’s time to get in shape by slicing processed meats!

You know the neighbors were all peeping out the window and were like, “Feets don’t fail me now!” when they saw Barb dump all those beautiful clothes on the front lawn.  The only thing missing was some obese toothless woman in a housecoat screaming “Yaaaaaaard Sale!” at the top of her cigarette smoke filled lungs.  I actually felt bad for Jenelle when she was left sitting on the curb with her basket of unmentionables  (like it was her own version of Occupy Wall Street) waiting to see what her next move would be.  I’m joking.   I loved it.  I loved it because you know that Keiffah will be using that laundry basket as a pot for his meth lab.  I have no idea how you make meth, but I assume a pot is involved.

In the end, the fight brought tears of joy to my dead-behind-the-eyes because Barb was in rare (and rear) form.  She may be playing up to the camera but I honestly think she’s playing up to me, specifically.  And when she was bent over screaming in Jenelle’s face and we caught a little glimpse of Barb’s heaving bosom (?), well that Mike is one lucky man.  Tune in Tokyo tonight for sure! P.S., If you like this recap, help me sell out by clicking the Facebook “recommend” button and spread the word! If not, get the hell out of here. Yaaaaw dead to me, ya lil b*tch!

Chelsea – Sidenote, all these specific recaps won’t be as long as Jenelle’s because, well, I can’t stand the rest of the cast.  Moving on.  Just to catch everyone up on Chelsea, this garbage can is still bricks.  Caught up?  Good.  Chelsea is still trying to figure out if the cow really did jump over the moon and pass her GED.  I mean, at this point just take the test and answer “B” for every question and let the chips just fall where they may.  Chelsea is really morphing into Meg Griffin this season by sporting almost the same exact hat and glasses.  Per usual, I found myself shouting at the TV, “Shut up, Meg!”

Chelsea is all nervous because Adam has come out of the woodwork and wants to suddenly see Aubree.  I’m sure the fact that they’ve started filming again has nothing to do with this at all.  Since she’s the kind of girl that finds self-confidence from men who treat her poorly it only makes sense that she’s going to allow Adam to come over to the house to see them both.  While Aubree is busy drinking apple juice and arsenic out of her bottle, Chelsea is busy getting ready for Adam’s visit by doing her hair and making sure that, literally, half of it is in front of her face.  That’s a style, nowhere.  Either way, Adam comes on over and his flirting with Chelsea via his Pam Anderson barb-wire tattoo that 98% of people began to regret in 1996.  I mean, why not just get the Tasmanian Devil on your shoulder while you’re at it?  Trash heap.  Adam keeps trying to kiss Chelsea and basically uses his daughter to flirt with her, which brings the creep factor to tilt.  You know what else creeps me out?  The fact that Chelsea’s mom is sporting an embroidered sweatshirt all while having a nose ring.  One of these things doesn’t belong.  I’m kidding, they both don’t belong.  Trick question/song.

In the end, Chelsea picks rotten pumpkins with her random friend and tries to pretend that she won’t get back with Adam because she is one step away from throwing up her meals and cutting herself in the bathroom with Aubree’s Play-Doh knife.  I’m already bored with this one, but on the other hand, I think I’ve just given myself the idea that I might want to play Play-Doh next week while watching this show.  The More You Know.

Leah – Ugh, her again.  Leah is totally the Maci of this series for me.  As soon as I see her I punch myself square in the nuts, which is odd because my nuts are round.  Then I find Sponge Bob and punch him square in the nuts because, well, that finally makes sense.  Anywhereareyourcrunchycurls, since this is the first episode Leah made sure to spruce up her bleach-blond clip on weave, just like mothers in Biblical times did.  Leah is having a real hard time keeping her sanity because she’s over her kids and wants to get a job so she can escape the asbestos of the trailer and make enough money so that she and Corey can buy gas.  I shat you not.  That’s what she said.  Uh, I’m pretty sure MTV is paying you enough money that you could even get Super at the gas station.   Plus, where the hell do they live again?  I’m almost certain they can ride on lawnmowers to get to their destination.  Sure that takes gas too, but not a lot.  And if worse came to worse, I mean where are they going really?  Walmart to visit Barb?  Shop online.  Corey isn’t comfortable with Leah getting a job because he’s afraid she’s going to flirt with her co-workers.  Seriously, Russell Armstrong yourself.  Too soon?  Yeah, because when Leah flirts there’s nothing guys love more than seeing a hot chick with a Britney Spears fright-wig and then hear that she’s 19 years old and has two 1 year old twins at home…in which the home is a trailer.  Hot.  Sexy.  Sexy hot.  I mean, she could flirt by taking off her pants and winking with her gentlemen greeter but, again, the two twins at home?  Deal breaker.

After Leah started filling out applications…at the Hallmark store her sexy MILF of a mom calls her to let her know that the Dentist office she works at is looking for an assistant.  Really?  They’re that busy?  How many people in the town even have teeth?  Regardless, Leah interviews with the dentist and gets hired right on the spot.  I guess even though she doesn’t have any experience with teeth she got the job because the dentist is confident in her ability to read names out loud in the waiting room.  Let’s just hope no one is named, “Geneticist.”  Hey-oh!  In the end, Corey isn’t overly psyched that Leah got a job because he’s still afraid she’s going to flirt with the toothless homeless people in the dentist chair.  Since we know these two are getting a divorce (y’all) we can assume why all of Corey’s scenes consisted of him talking to Leah about her flirting…about her sexy crunchy curls style flirtin’.

Kail – Why is she still on this show?  I’m going to be ashamed of myself for saying this, but Kail seems like the most put together out of this whole bunch.  I give her extra points because her mom, Suzi, seems like she’s done permanent damage to Kail’s brain.  The main emphasis around Kail’s scenes deals with Halloween and trick-or-treating.  Where the hell is Janet?  I’m sorry if Janet isn’t going to be in each episode with Kail well then I’m not sure I want to watch.  I’m kidding, I’ll watch.  What the hell else am I going to do?  Read?  Hahaha.  I’m joking, I’m allergic to books and the written word.

Kail ends up calling Joe and they have a civilized conversation about him letting Kail take the baby early so she can go trick-or-treating with him.  That’s nice that they can communicate like this now.  I bet they’re banging.  I won’t even mention the fact that she’s planning on taking him out trick-or-treating at 8:00 at night.  Get the hell to bed.  It gets dark at like 5:30.  Wrap it up.  I’m referring to the trick-or-treating and in regards to condoms too.  Anyyawn, Issac is dressed up as a giraffe, Jordan is dressed up as a baby, and Kail is dressed up as a cowgirl, which really sucks because she totally should have gone as the Cowardly Lion.  Or Janet with rabies and in heat!  Ole!  Seriously, nothing else happens with Kail and I’m tired of writing what I can only assume is a 300 page manifesto of the season premiere of Teen Mom 2.  I hate me.

Enjoy these poorly written Teen Mom 2 Recap?  Wanna talk Pitocin with me?  Join me on Facebook and let’s be friends.  Awkward friends!

Speaking of joining stuff on Facebook, why not follow my “I Love Jenelle’s Mothers Accent” Facebook page too!  Details below.  While supplies last.

facebook ibbb twitter ibbb

Craptastic Thoughts from IBBB Readers!

  1. IBBB Said,

    Hello good people! Like the latest Teen Mom Recap? Wanna be friends with IBBB on Facebook? Join me!

    http://www.facebook.com/people/Patrick-Varone/1591687454

    And follow me on Twitter because, well, sometimes I use it!

    http://www.twitter.com/ibbb

    Barb is back!

    -IBBB

  2. Mandy Said,

    I just KNEW Leah’s mom’s “updated” do would be a recap highlight. After all, she OBVIOUSLY took your kind words to heart and ditched the look of Amanda. Sound efforts, in my opinion.

    Also, let’s hope my husband never decides to divorce me… After hearing what a prize I’d be with two-year-old twins… Well, that’s that!

  3. L-train Said,

    Merry Jesus Clause Christmas, Teen mom recaps are BACK! I missed Barb like woa. My favorite scene with Barb was the first one because her fly was down the whole time. She was totally trying to give you a glimpse of her gentleman greeter.

    Where is Keifah coming from in all these scenes? They just show Jenelle calling him and then 30 seconds later he appears. They said he was homeless but what kind of homeless? Is he in a shelter or sleeping in the woods?

  4. QueenofCorona Said,

    Why is Chesty Husky’s face so greazy? Does she misteak her orange makeup applicator with a slice of summer sausage? I want to reach out and blot her with a mop. And is eyeliner they only make up they sell in South Dakota? Someone needs to tell her sister you’re not suppose to use the whole eyeliner pencil in one application.

    I like how Jenelle’s meth head friends lecture her about the trouble that is Keefer. Intervention called, they want their tweakers back. And shower, all of you. For the love of narcotics, just shower already.

    I can’t say I blame Kail for not admitting to dating Lennie from Of Mice and Men. Anyone notice Isaac is looking less and less like a California Raisin this season?

  5. Lennon Said,

    I am one line into this and pissing my pants laughing…..

  6. mamacourt Said,

    Best.ReCap.EVAH!

    My face itches when I look at the trash and all the makeup they wear. Enough with the eye liner, trash bags!

    apple juice and arsenic = WIN! Although, I have to say I let my kids finish a bottle of apple juice (before I switched them to white grape). Can’t let perfectly good sugary arsenic go to waste, yo.

  7. Keiffahsgreensweatshirt Said,

    I die, I tell you! I lost 4,765 lbs of water weight crying & laughing hysterically. Shake weight vs. Walmart meat cutting= genius.

  8. Huh? Said,

    Of all the trash boxes on this show, Chelsea irritates me the most. You nailed it with her “getting her self-confidence from men who treat her poorly.” She is the worst!! The hearts in her eyes & her dumb dumb grin during the entirety of Adam’s visit made me want to vomit.

  9. Jenny Said,

    Your recap was awesome! You have such a gift!

  10. Brenda Walsh Said,

    Loved (not) Leah’s mom’s makeover! She looks much less like a mole this season.

    Does anyone remember where they stopped airing last season if relation to this? So it basically seems like they never stopped filming, and the timeline is just sort of perplexing. Also, some of those babies aren’t even one yet? How is it their first Halloween? Aren’t they all walking? Well Isaac is humongous, so it’s hard to gauge his actual age.

    Does anyone know where I can buy Keiffer’s amazing spade and heart print shorts?

  11. alwayssunny Said,

    @L-train
    i thought the same thing about keiffer magically appearing 30 seconds later after just a short stroll down the street. what is he sleeping in her neighbor’s tree house or something?

    i was also very sad about the lack of janet in this episode. i want her to be my life coach and my best friend. i am surprised at my lack of hate for kail this season. i used to hate her most due to her annoyingness and lack of ability to say the words “thank you”. but now i kind of hate her least. i’m sure it’ll all come back though, we’re only one episode in.

    finally, leah seemed pretty proud to be making a whole 8.50 an hour. i’m not positive but i think that’s minimum wage here. i don’t know what that translates to in west virginia confederate dollars but dream big girl!

  12. Erica Said,

    I’m disappointed… I just knew you were going to rip Jordan a new one for that ridiculous big baby Halloween costume!!!

  13. KittyKat Said,

    Barb quotes = Merry Christmas to me!!!!!! God I love that woman. And thanks to the caption that appears when I scroll over the photos I am now singing “Here comes ‘Barb in Black!’” over and over again.

    Glad the crunch and pube curls are gone. Oh West Virginia…

  14. Bitch Jungle Said,

    Kieffah has to smell sooo fukin bad. ew.

  15. katie Said,

    God bless you, Patrick. Please take it easy on your nuts, I worry that if you damage them too much that you and Barb may not be able to have children (once she leaves her boyfriend for the only man in this world who truly loves her)

  16. Kiera Said,

    Oh I’m sure there’s lots of dental work needed in West Virginia…meth mouth and 6-month olds drinking Mt. Dew from a bottle must sure bring in the numbers.

  17. thatsit-yaadunn Said,

    Thank you ibbb!

    As I’ve indicated many times, I effing love this blog you run and honestly, I was waiting for this recap to be published all night.

    Proof is at my 3AM tweets to @ibbb.. cah mahn, it was a Tuesday night kedd (kid in “Southy” language.. you know exactly what I mean).

    You’re a talented writer and you make people laugh their asses off.. I’m sure you wouldn’t mind me forwarding this recap’s link.

    Just when I thought you got me with the Bahb vs. Janelle recap, you pull out the Cowardly Lion card. I fold.

  18. KS Said,

    I thought for sure you would catch the “For Rent/Sale” sign behind Jenelle whilst being thrown out by Barb!

  19. Square Hair Said,

    I should be embarrassed to say this buttt I totally have those red snowflake PJs that Barb had on…and I totally got them from WallyWorld :/

    I used to like Leah last season but…has it seemed like she has changed into a b*tch?! Like when she was talking to Corey about her new job over the phone and she just kept rolling her eyes and was like, “Well are you gonna ask me about it?!” *ROLLS EYES*…they both roll their eyes a lot and it gets on my nerrrrves!!

    Hmmm Kail…Jordan is hott…that is all…

    Chelsea…you’re such a dumb biaaa…goodbye! :)

  20. Barb's Bosom Said,

    I think one of the highlights for me was when Barb said “Well guess what? I hope you have fun livin’ in the street wif yaw boooooyfriend.” Her voice got 12 shades deeper and it was like she was whispering it in Jenelle’s ear like sweet nothings!

  21. dacabsarehere Said,

    Here let me help you out you can use this as the recap for this and every episode after:

    “I wish my parents would trust me again after getting slammed at 16 and ruining my life”

    “I’m so sick of staying home and taking care of babies all day”

    “I’m so lonely, I wish he would pay more attention to me”

    STFU already. I have to admit 10 minutes into this crappy, crybaby, whine-fest I flipped to Storage Wars. That’s right I would rather watch middle-aged men pillage through garbage than a bunch of trashboxes pillage through life. It’s the same boring ass whine-fest week after week anymore and if not for the Jershey Shore trailer I may of never flipped back! Which I am not happy about either because if we have another season of Meatballs doing scissors and Mike talking about Meatballs blowing on his Vienna instead of the real point to this show … xenadrine-roid-raged blow-ups than I will be extremely let down.

    Let me just blow through the rest of the season for you …

    Chelsea takes back loser, loser is a loser, Chelsea gets cheated on, dumped on and left by loser. Tears.

    CrunchyCurls gets a job, can’t figure out whats wrong with her baby, decides Cory sucks. Tears.

    Jenelle pisses off Barb, Jenelle pisses off Barb, Jenelle … you get the picture … Tears.

    Kail realizes life sucks. Tears.

  22. Anonymous Said,

    Whyyyyy would you get married to someone if you still thought they might possibly cheat on you?!?!?!?! This makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. Barb was classic the entire episode and I loved every minute of it! I too wondered where kieffah was always coming from. I would LOVE to be driving one day and see him standing in a field on the side of the road, that would be amazing. He would be in his green hoodie, obviously.

  23. SuzieQ Said,

    The Amazingness returns.

  24. Kieffer Said,

    You forget about the real kicker to the Bard and Jenelle fight – Jenelle got caught because she lent Kieffer her car so that “he could visit some friends.” Like how the hell did she think she would get that past Barb? What a dumbass.

  25. Jenna Said,

    Awesome recap, but I was shocked that you didn’t mention Leah and Corey’s hot date at “Quaker Steak and Lube”. I thought for sure you would pick up on that…

  26. Kelli Said,

    I also noticed they went to Quaker Steak and Lube and laughed like a madwoman because I knew Patrick wuld have something to say about it.

  27. Rachel Said,

    Jesus Claus has blessed us all early! Yayyyy!

    Jenelle’s friends were seriously tweaking when they were talking about what a loser Kieffah is. Amber exhibits what I like to call “meth face.” When Barb said “boyyyyffrrrraaaaannndd” my sister and I laughed so hard. I also laughed when she accused Jenelle of being “out gettin’ hiiiiiigh all tha time.”

    I cannot believe no one has commented on the absence of Randilicious in this episode! Chelsea is just retarded, and Adam is still a douche. Same shiz, different season.

    Kail, how can you have a serious conversation with someone dressed as a giant baby? I miss Janet.

    Leah… The fame has gotten to her bleached head. She acted like a little b the whole episode. I can’t wait to see what leads up to the divorce. She’s so sweet and such a natural beauty, I’m not surprised Corey is worried about someone stealing her away. He had a severe case of crazy eyes last night.

  28. Dana Said,

    Dammit, dacabsarehere, you ruined the season for me! You’re supposed to announce it if you’re posting a spoiler! And here I thought that these idiots had matured after all this time!

    I’m going to have to watch again, because I missed Barb’s fly down and some of the finer points of the fight. I go back and forth on who I’m rooting for in the Barb vs Janelle fights. Sometimes it seems like barb just dangles Jace like a carrot and then jerks him back after Janelle jumps through Barb’s hoops. But then Janelle ruins it for me because, as a mother myself, I want to punch her in the face every time she ungratefully screams “bitch!” at her mother who is RAISING HER SON FOR HER and giving her a place to stay. I found myself throughout the who episode just wishing and hoping that she’d get caught with her hand in the Keiffah-jar, and was just giddy when she did!

    Oh, and Chelsea annoys me more than anything on the planet. She is pathetic, and deserves to be treated like that because she keeps taking him back. Oh, and I thought the same thing about the eyeliner. Like, seriously, leave some for tomorrow! Damn!

  29. blargh Said,

    Chelsea’s need to use eyeliner is prevalent in the Midwest. they all have big, I-just-rubbed-my-hair-on-the-carpet hair and raccoon eyes. I haven’t figured out why this is the case yet. Unfortunately, I feel like I know Chelsea; she’s like every other girl in the South Dakota/Iowa/Nebraska area. Makes me sad :(

  30. Heather Said,

    The timeframe here really confused me, because I was sure this footage couldn’t be over a year old. They are celebrating Halloween 2010 – the same month Leah and Corey got married in last season’s finale. They are all wearing the same clothes and fighting about the same things because literally no time has passed. When this was shot, the first season hadn’t even premiered yet, which I think explains their actions a little more. Maybe Leah really did need to earn some gas money? She wasn’t a “star” yet.

  31. Eva Said,

    I think instead of Wife Swap, MTV should film daughter swap. First up Farrah moves in with Barb, and Jenelle moves in with good ole Deb.

  32. Jillian Said,

    Daughter swap with barb and deb would be amazing. You think yaw a model? Get ridda that dawg ya lil’ b!tch.

  33. LovetoReadHere Said,

    I was disappointed that no time had passed since we left these lil bitches. Despite that, Leah’s mom was looking cuter than Leah . . . I still don’t care for Kail, but she did look good in braids, a vast improvement over the side ponytail.

  34. KittyKat Said,

    @Eva…BRILLIANT! Maybe getting chased down with a knife would help Janelle get on the straight and narrow.

  35. IBBB Said,

    Can I just say that I love all the comments here at Camp IBBB? They always crack me up. Crack is whack!

    -IBBB

  36. Penelope Said,

    “It’s time to get in shape by slicing processed meats!”

    I just almost choked to death on a piece of spicy salmon roll. Do you know how bad wasabi hurts when it sticks in your sinuses?

  37. donna Said,

    i just read amber has been diagnosed as bipolar and disassociative disorder….wow.in other news barb kicked jenelle out again.you totally know shell give her “one”more chance.

  38. SimplySarah Said,

    I enjoyed Barb’s little fast walk down the driveway with Jenelle’s basket of clothes in her hands. That’s it, yaw done!

  39. Lisa Said,

    I’m dying to know how old Barb is. She looks 60! Hard living or actual age? HMMMM.

  40. joyce Said,

    Yeah Donna–isn’t it fascinating timing that the “I Have a Medical Reason for My Behavior” news is revealed the day after the Teen Mom 2 premiere?
    Oh and she had a smackdown at the IHOP last month too. Pancakes FTW!

  41. kasey Said,

    I’m pretty sure the cast still thinks they’re filming for season 1. They CLEARLY don’t have their earnings yet. Although Chelsea was sporting jeans (albeit completely torn up) in one scene instead of the XL sweats so maybe she did have some extra cash.

  42. donna Said,

    joyce,ambers ihop incident shows to me,that she is not able to control herself and is not an effectve parent.quick,call brandon and teresa.carly needs a sister.

  43. Dana Said,

    Eve, I would totally watch daughter swap!! What an awesome idea!

  44. Claire Said,

    I seriously fight the urge to hop in my car and drive to wherever the hell it is that Chelsea lives. ND maybe? Just so I can attack her poorly dyed Old Man River combover with some scizzors and her face with some Pond’s make-up removing wipes. Nobody should model their eye make up after Alice Cooper…nobody.

  45. Rebecca Said,

    Now Jenelle can live on the grassy knoll with Keiffah!
    When Barb was throwing Jenelle’s stuff outside, I kept thinking, “Their neighbors must hate this crazy family!” Then when Jenelle was sitting on the end of the driveway, I noticed the “For Sale” sign next door. Awesome!

  46. 26yoMom Said,

    You think yaw a model? Get ridda that dawg ya lil b!tch! <— Omg! I seriously lol'd! I never do that from reading!

  47. Nancy Said,

    If we could get Barbara and Deb to swap daughters, I would watch the live feed of that shit 24/7 on the Internets, like when they did it for Big Brother.

    Kinda scary to realize that Kailyn is, like, the one teen mom I’m rooting for from this series.

  48. kas Said,

    I think Keiffah lives on Barb’s roof.

  49. KittyKat Said,

    Hah! Keiffah living on Barb’s roof. Keiffah Clause!

    Can we send Amber to live in a house with Barb AND Deb?! If that doesn’t knock the bitch straight, nothing will. (And, yes, poor baby Leah should go to Brandon and Theresa.)

    I’ve missed my IBBB family! So glad we get to be together for the holidays.

  50. Brooke Said,

    Editing note – did anyone notice that when Kail was getting in the car leaving Joe’s her hair was in 2 tight braids and when she drove away 2 seconds later, it was all down and straight??

  51. Penelope Said,

    Chelsea and Jenelle both look like they are…unclean. As in, smelling of the trash can behind the local Red Lobster. Chelsea especially. Everything about that girl looks dirty to me: her rats’ nest hair, her greasy overly made up face, her schlubby clothes. Yuck.

  52. ALF Said,

    So glad to have Barb, Jenelle and iBBB back in my life!

  53. ALF Said,

    Why did Chelsea and her fellow teen mom friend continue to lug pumpkins around that patch when there was a damn wagon not even a foot a way? WHY?! No wonder the lil bitch (TM Barb) can’t pass the GED!

  54. Miss W Said,

    Wow, Teen Mom 2 is trashier than evah…I am a closet watcher bc my friends and family give me a funny look if I bring up the show. Thank goodness I have a place to come (IBBB) talk about this train wreck!!

  55. Shenanigans Said,

    Love the recap. My favorite line in the whole 300 page manifesto?

    “Seriously, Russell Armstrong yourself.”

    I laughed so loud that I woke up my children. Never too soon!

  56. Wednesdaystreat Said,

    LOL so many times, I cannot count! That includes the comments. Barb’s tiraid to Farrah is CLASSIC!! Good one, Jillian!

    I totally agree–not only do these girls (most of them) not know how to use birth control, they also don’t shower. Lazy much?

  57. Sierra Said,

    I used to look forward to watching Teen Mom, but now I look forward to reading your blogs about it.
    And yes Brooke I noticed that! I pay attention to all the clothes and hair changes. Shows you how out of order everything is.