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Harriet Carter Product of the Week: Tricks for Nana

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Door Exercises for Nana – Who’s ready to trick Nana!?  If you shot your hand up and yelled out “I am, I am!” put your hand down because I can’t hear you.  This is just a website.  Geesh.  Anyway, if times are getting a little stale around your home then why not simply hook up your very own “Futuristic Door Opener.”  Finally an answer to “What has landing on the moon ever got us?”  You and the kids will be squealing with delight when you watch Nana struggle with this advanced pulley system when trying to exit the room.  When her arms fall from exhaustion be sure to keep shouting “Keep it up, Nana, I think I saw it open a little bit!”  To really bring this prank to a whole new level, simply place some fireworks into a metal pot, light them, and start screaming “Hurry Nana, al qaeda is attacking us!”  She’ll have 3 sets of ten reps in under no time!  But don’t just take my suggestions as Gospel, perhaps you have some of your own stunts that you’d like to try out.  Perhaps Elvis, Marilyn Monroe, and Abe Lincoln are currently player a round of poker in the other room and they need a 4th to complete their game?  Better hurry, Nana, before someone shoots Abe!  Hell, maybe you tell her baby Jessica fell back down that God-damn well and the EMTs need Nana’s wooden bucket to scoop her out in a jiffy before baby Jessica drowns?  I mean, sky is the limit. And what the hell is she smiling about?  Does this look fun to you?  It looks like she might as well be sitting on the electric chair instead of a wooden chair because I’m pretty sure this is capital punishment, you know, in Nana’s world.  I’m also almost certain by the looks of this workout contraption that after pulling those handles about 10 times the entire thing will fall apart, fall off the door, knock Nana in the head, and toss her into a permanent slumber party.  Eh, at least she’ll be the guest of honor at the party.  Ole!

Note: Contraption can also provide hours of laughs when hooked up to virtually any toilet seat or bottle of arthritis medication.

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